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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [21m] girlfriend [19f] is in tears because her cousin [18m] that she was close with will no longer talk to her because he just started dating a girl[18f] that hates and badmouths me, constantly.
POST: About 8 months ago, I was good friends with the girl that hates me now. She, let's call her Kari, is also the little sister to a friend of mine. Long story short for this part, my friend was "in love" with my current girlfriend, although they never dated and she made it clear she was not interested in him, but still she wanted to be friends with him. He got jealous and started trash talking me and almost got my girlfriend and I to break up. For two hours Kari called me a pussy, that I had no friends, and that everyone hated me because I wouldn't talk to my former friend. I got fed up with it, and out of rage, I called her skank. She blocked me on everything possible and even went on mutual friends' phones and deleted me from everything without their knowing.
Now, Kari met my girlfriend's cousin at a country music festival and began dating him (we don't know if it's for revenge, but she is a grudge holding spiteful person like that). She has bad mouthed me to a point that my girlfriend's cousin will no longer talk to my girlfriend. My girlfriend is also worried that Kari is bad mouthing me to the remainder of her family. Kari only tells half the story and leaves out the parts where she said horrible things to me and only includes me calling her a skank. We are also positive she has blocked my girlfriend from her cousin's phone.
We have no idea what to do and her cousin will not listen or even talk to my girlfriend.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend's cousin is dating a girl that hates me and only tells half the truth to my girlfriend's family. Her cousin won't talk to her anymore and we are extremely worried she is intentionally breaking apart my girlfriend's family. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [M/21] hate my mom [F/56] and dad [M/71], even though they're just depressed, lonely, and poor.
POST: Every time I get a phone call or go to visit them it completely destroys me inside. They'll talk about how they can't pay their bills, about all their doctors visits, and about how they didn't do anything today (I literally can't remember the last time they did anything exciting or productive for themselves). They'll apologize for not being better parents growing up (the past is the past, stop fucking bringing it up). My dad only, ONLY talks about politics (Yes i'm angry about the political climate in this country but it's like you're barely a fucking person. Stop talking about shit you hate and talk about what inspires you). They're both overweight and have numerous health problems, and the still continue to eat like shit and drink a massive amount of coke.
They're both so sweet, and I know that they're doing the best they can (and did the best they could with our big family at the time), but I can't fucking take it anymore. I called my Dad today to wish him a happy birthday and the phone call was just so fucking depressing. He sounded better when I said I was coming to visit this weekend but i'm dreading it. It's not like i'm not trying, but I do so well when I forget about my family and my past. After the call today (and many other days) I just felt like all the progress i'd made in keeping sane went down the drain.
It's 5am and i'm failing nearly all my classes and I couldn't concentrate on anything today. I've eaten fast food 3 times today started listening to depressing music again. I'm well aware that I should "do the best I can" and "love them the way they are" and that "you can't run away from your problems" but i'm so fucking tired of
TL;DR: | My parents are real nice and I do my best to love them but they piss me off and trigger my depression and I am a much better person when I just forget about them. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [36 F] with my roommates [27 F] & [22 F] 8 years, I'm buying house - they aren't happy
POST: I decided after living in an apartment and getting a better job that I love, to buy a house. I've been living with my roommates (who happen to also be like sisters to me - I've been adopted into their family). Both roommates work and are also going to college. I started this search for a home and found a house that I love. They came with me to see the house along with my parents. I loved it. I knew it was the house I would grow old in. My parents loved it. The girls, they weren't sold on it. I told them that this was the house. They didn't understand why I didn't want to look at other houses, my thoughts: I just knew.
Well, fast forward 5 months later and the seller of the house backed out. Long story, basically not structurally sound..he pulled it off the market because he didn't want to fix it. So I started my search again.
I found another house. Loved it. This time the same thing happened. I told them about the house, the [27] year old loved it. The [22] became instantly upset because she wasn't included in on the process. The process: Me going to a home that I 'may' buy and looking at it by myself. Really?
It should be said that I will be making them pay rent. The [22] year old pays $175/mo. The [27] will pay $300/mo. The [22] year old works 30 hrs a week and is a full time college student. The [27] year old works 40 hrs a week and is going to Grad school online. And its really not about the money. Its the way they act. As if nothing is good enough. I can't afford a $400,000 dollar home. I'm a single income person. Its just so frustrating. How do I handle the entitlement attitude? How do I say it nicely as too not hurt the friendships we have? I'm at a complete loss.
TL;DR: | So thats a small summary of my life story the last few months. I just don't know what to do. How do I make her understand that what she says hurts and that this isn't all about her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/BreakUps
TITLE: Boyfriend (25) and I (24) broke up after 6 years. Don't know what to do with myself.
POST: So we met through a friend when I was 18. Been dating since then. We broke up once or twice before but always got back together.
The issue the whole relationship was always that he never had a stable job. Always quitting or getting fired. The first couple years it didn't bother me because I was going to school and it didn't matter. But when I started working in my career, I found a job about an hour away and had to move. We would switch off once a week driving to see each other and then he started going to school.
He really puts 100% into his school work, which I always supported. But i really wanted him to work while in school. It started to feel like I was supporting him since he was staying in my place during summer and not really helping out much while I was at work. He would pitch in a little and clean but most days he'd sit around on the computer all day. Really only thinking and caring about himself.
I just couldn't do it anymore. He stopped taking care of himself and eating unhealthy, fatty foods. Even started pulling the "i forgot my wallet" when we would go out. Everything turned into a fight. I couldn't talk to him without getting annoyed or angry.
After 6 years, I know nothing about dating or where to even meet people. I'm just looking for some advice and to vent a little I guess.
TL;DR: | broke up with boyfriend of 6 years. Looking for some new dating advice and just need a place to vent since I don't have anyone else unbiased to talk to. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I've [28 M] been attracted to my coworker [29 F] for months. Went on two dates, things went great, then went luke warm, I backed off. What do I do next?
POST: So, I started working in a new department which happened to be where the girl, that I've had interest in, had been working. While we do have small interactions here and there at work, we rarely spend the work day with each other.
She started hitting me up hard via text. We went on two dates which were great, laughing drinking touching. Now, just a few weeks later, things seem luke warm at best. I asked her out again and got a noncommittal (which really means no) response.
I decided to take a step back. Not text her first. When I see her at work, I don't attempt to avoid her but don't approach her either. Just kinda keeping my cool for the past week, she brought in treats today and made sure I got one, and I think my efforts are working -but I'm not really sure.
What can I do to stoke the fire? How do I get her to be more curious about me? How do I turn things around and have her chase me instead?
TL;DR: | I've been attracted to a coworker, we went on a few dates, asked her out and she gave me a noncommittal no, I backed off and she responded to it slightly. What do I do next? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21/ M] with my girlfriend [21/ F] of 1 month; I don't know if I am ready for a relationship.
POST: I've been dating this girl for the past month and she is lovely.
She is thoughtful, encouraging, passionate about life, and we share many things in common.
Despite all of her wonderful traits, I find myself prioritizing other
things above her. I am trying to keep my head above water in school, I am not financially stable, I have been playing a lot of shows lately that tend to interrupt our spending time together (although I need the money).
She is a very talented and busy artist, and will be graduating from school by the end of the semester. Her free time is scarce as well, equating to the fact that we only see each other about twice a week.
We're both very new to relationships, and I am wondering if it is a better idea to enjoy each other as friends since it is a new relationship, rather than the stress and accountability that comes with dating.
TL;DR: | Deciding whether or not to continue dating my girlfriend, or call it off and be friends given our busy schedules and lack of time being spent together. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (F20) really enjoy the company of M20 but can't get past how tiny he is. Help?
POST: I've been talking to this guy for 3ish weeks now and I definitely am on the track to liking him as more than a friend. We have a ton in common, he's pretty attractive, and we have conversations that last for hours.
My only issue is his height. I'm 5'4" and 3/4 and he's solidly 5'4". Me being almost an inch taller than him doesn't really bother me too much, but he's super skinny as well-- as in, really underweight skinny. He doesn't really look unhealthy, he's just small in stature. I'm more on the curvy side (not really fat or anywhere close to obese, but I have some meat on me), and I constantly feel like I'm going to break him or that I look morbidly obese compared to him. It's just a really big turn off and I'm really confused on how to go about this.
Like I said, I get along with him really well and we clearly don't have a problem communicating. I'm just having trouble being physically attracted to him because of how small he is.
TL;DR: | I am emotionally attracted to a guy who is much smaller than me. He's physically attractive aesthetically and we get along amazingly, but I can't get past his height and weight. What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17 M] with my long-distance GF [18 F] have been talking for over a year, but I feel like i cannot love anyone after a while.
POST: So I've been talking with this girl for 14 months, and this summer(last week) I went to meet her for the first time. It was all good and I was crazy in love with her the first few days, but after we kissed for the first time (the day after), I just suddenly stopped feeling "the love".
I'm home now and I really do miss her but I'm just not feeling the love like I used to. I live most of my life in solitude but I genuinely feel like I love this girl, even though I can't really feel it, and it just all went so sudden(being crazy in love to not feeling anything, but still caring about her).
I know she's a great girl and I'm definitely lucky to have her, but it makes me sad when I can't give the sensation of love back to her..
TL;DR: | I met my long distance girlfriend, but after a few days of "really" being together I feel like I don't love her anymore. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I, college bound[18M], want your opinions continuing a relationship while I am in college with my [17F] girlfriend
POST: I[18M] just graduated high school. My GF[17F] and I have been together for about 2 years. I love her very much. We have a very healthy relationship. We argue but we get over it. We lost our virginity together. She's basically my best friend who I also fuck.
My gf is still in high school. From her house to my college will be about a 45 min drive.
I think we will be able to make it work. I just don't know. I have to concerns:
1. My gf is very jealous of pretty much every girl. This is partially my fault as I flirted with another girl a year or so ago. She tells me at this point she's worried Ill find someone who I love more. I don't want to put her through any pain of not knowing. (Even though I would never cheat)
2. Although I love her, I'm very young and I've only ever been with her. I kind of want to experience the world. (other vaginas)
In the end I know it's my choice, but I just want to hear everyone else's experience and opinions.
TL;DR: | Should I stay with my "high school sweetheart(for lack of a better term)" or should I go to college single? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by slapping my friend's butt
POST: This happened about 3 years ago, when I was 15. I'm a brazilian male, and in my first year of high school, we had a study trip to "Foz do Iguaçu" . On the second day there, we went on a boat ride near the falls, so everyone was wearing a raincoat, duo to the large amount of water falling. Me and my friends were pranking each other, when someone was distracted, we would pretend to throw them into the water or just slap them in the head. It all ended when our teacher started to complain about our attitude, but she=turned around, one of my friends that was wearing his own raincoat, a really cool black one, slapped me really hard in the head. I got extremelly mad, because I couldn't do anything about it.
After a few minutes waiting for my chance, I saw him crouched near the front of the boat.That was the moment I was waiting for. I got near him in silence and slapped his butt with my full power. He didn't move a bit. I looked to my right and saw him and some of my friends looking at me terrified, I frooze. I looked down again and the shyest girl in my grade turns her head around, embarrassed as hell. She had the same raincoat as my friend. Someone had just slapped her butt really hard.
I spent a few hours trying to apoligize for what i'd just done, but I even after 3 years, on our graduation, I was still afraid talking to her.
TL;DR: | On a boat ride in "Foz do Iguaçu",I was trying to get a revenge on my friend by slapping his butt, but i accidently slapped the shyest girl of my grade. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me (21f) and my slightly tumultuous breakup/friendship/potential get back problems with ex boyfriend of 2.5 years (m21)
POST: Boyfriend and I broke up 2 months ago and since then we have talked about getting back together a few times but I've kind of backed out last minute. The reason for our break up was because we were drifting apart and not seeing each other as much/getting on each other's nerves more. I think we're both hurting and do still like each other but there's so much negativity now that it's really hard to be around each other but I also feel like it's pretty sad not being able to talk to each other. I was originally thinking that maybe we can reconsider it if we are friends/really liked each other's company as friends at the end of summer we are willing to put aside any differences. We were kind of moving towards friendly terms when I found out he hooked up with a girl that was a close friend of his that I always suspected he had a thing for but he denied before we got together. I also told him I don't particularly like this girl and I didn't feel comfortable with their slightly touchiness thing though and he didn't really distance himself which led to me trying to be less jealous. Anyways I guess it's not a big deal but it did make me remember some other not so rosy times and made me realize while I feel really strongly for him maybe we should just put the nail on the coffin and say this is the end. Is that what I should do or should love prevail, or is it easier to just start anew? Another thing is it makes me really sad that we're not talking now. I guess being friends right away is hard but it would be nice to at least be friendly since we go to the same school/work in the same building. It makes me really upset to think that I will just stop talking and lose contact with someone who was so important to me but it also makes me sad whenever we talk.
TL;DR: | ex-boyfriend and I had disagreements which led to break-up. Talks of getting back together but I always got cold feet. What should I do, can we remain friendly? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by taking a picture of my friend getting a BJ
POST: Tonight I fucked up. I'm on holidays meeting a friend, so I was sleeping at his place, in a couch in his bedroom, where he lives with a girl. Another noteworthy detail is that they sleep with a dull light on the whole night.
I had some issue falling asleep, but I guess my friend thought i was fast asleep. After a while the girl started giving a blowjob to my friend. I thought it was extremely funny and decided to take a picture. Not sure why, maybe I'd mock him after a few days, or possibly just for fun.
Trying to be as silent as possible I grabbed my phone, lying next to me on the couch, slowly raised it on my tummy, turned it on while facing my body and slowly turned it toward my eyes to be sure it its light wasn't too strong. Muted it, opened the camera app and took the picture. The mobile flashed. Fuck. The guys jerked immediately. Double fuck. The turned to me. I was screwed. They immediately stopped and started asking me what the fuck I was doing. He was quite angry, I was afraid he was gonna beat me up.
We turned the lights on and started talking about what just happened. I tried to remark the irony, but the girl and my friend were really pissed, and they decided to kick me out. I thought they were kidding, but here I am now, 1AM outside without a shelter...
TL;DR: | Was sleeping on my friend's couch. He got a BJ thinking I was asleep. Took a picture with my mobile, it flashed and I got kicked out. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Update: Me [34 M] and my wife [35 F] married 9yrs, her anger issues are coming between us and hurting our kids.
POST: [Original Post Here](
We went out of town for a few days after my last post so I didn't get around to responding to a lot of comments. Thank you for the responses to those who posted, I think I knew what needed to be done but it was helpful to have it reinforced from more than just someone in my family.
Since I posted, we've talked. She's agreed to see a psychiatrist to start then we'll take it from there, if appointments are not scheduled by next week, then the divorce ultimatum comes out. I didn't have to lay out an ultimatum, but if that's what it comes to then that's what it comes to. I don't think she understands what's wrong with her actions, but she's really trying to hold it back since the incident with our son. She says things like "how am I supposed to teach my kids right from wrong?", or "how can I make them respect them me?" Which makes me think she really doesn't understand and may just be paying me lip service. But I'll give her a chance to follow through, she's so afraid of being left alone and my divorcing her that the ultimatum will be equal to me asking for divorce in her mind. Sadly, since we talked she thinks I'm blaming her now, but she thinks even our kids are blaming her and somehow out to get her one day this past week. She doesn't seem to care how guilty I feel or care at all that I was complicit in this.
My son's in therapy now, and I talk to both kids every day to find out if there were any incidents I missed while I was at work. So far we've just had one incident with our daughter that I was home for and was able to end without incident.
TL;DR: | wife has agreed to seek therapy, we'll see if she actually does it, son is in therapy, ultimatum for divorce will be applied if therapy does not happen. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What is your scariest storm story?
POST: Anything from lightning and thunder to tornado here is mine.
Out on lake Havasu in Nevada with dad, step mom, sister, uncle, aunt, and 2 cousins. The night before a lightning storm knocked out power to the city were in and did not want to go out on the lake because we knew there were still storms. About noon and 115 degrees we decided to go out. Got on boat went straight across the lake found a harbor. No more than 30 minutes later lightning storms appeared out of no where. We were stuck in this cove. All of us being in the water and 60 MPH winds kicking up sand we huddled behind the boat when lightning struck the water and we all felt a slight jolt. Ran onto the shore each adult grabbed a kid and huddled with them with towels while laying on spare life jackets. Hail, 60 MPH wind lightning and thunder right on top of us probably scariest 5 minutes of my life. Get up and we are all covered in sand start to grab our shit and get out when my dad sees some guy calling for help just floating out in the middle of the lake. Packed the boat up super quick and in our attempt to get out of there quickly we tore the prop up on some rocks. The guy was going back to the harbor when the storm hit he was on a jetski towing a broken one. Lost the jetskis (but we found them floating) he said 8+ foot waves on the lake (luckily he had a life jacket). Get back to the harbor there are about 3 house boats missing, a dock was flipped with 2 boats still attached to it and under water and a bridge that went from the docks to land was twisted and broken. Even the locals came out and were taking pictures. Also the guy was super scared because his wife and kids were on another boat going into the harbor but he found them.
TL;DR: | felt electrical shock of lightning while in water, extremely high winds, sand and saved a guy who was stuck in the middle of the lake with huge waves. Docks and boats were flipped back at the harbor. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Do I walk out on people too quickly? (21F)
POST: I'm sure this has to do with my ego/self defense issues, but I discard friendships/relationships very easily.
Eg. A good friend (24m) I have slept with on occasion and I stopped talking for three months after we got in an argument. The other night he calls me at 4 am, wasted, and says he's sorry and misses hanging out and can he please see me again. I tell him he's drunk and it was for the best we broke ties but he keeps asking and eventually I agree to meet up with him on a given day. I'm still hesitant but happy that we'll see each other again. An hour or so before we were supposed to meet he texts me and says whoops he double booked, he has to bail.
Normally this would bug me but I wouldn't really care, but the fact that he spent so long convincing me to meet up in the first place after not talking for months, and then bailing on me on the day we were supposed to reconcile really pissed me off. I just told him to forget it, delete my number.
TL;DR: | I drop people pretty quickly, I feel like most relationships/friendships aren't worth chasing after someone. Should I give people more of a chance? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23 M] and my [18 F] friend slept together and are now falling for eachother. Her [30 M] ex is suicidally in love with and manipulating her. What the fuck do I do?
POST: So long story short I met a girl, we hit it off, had sex and now we're kind of falling in love with each other. But her ex boyfriend is a fucking maniac who's threatening to kill himself if she stops talking to him. The man has a history of mental problems and family abuse so its highly likely he will act on them. She agreed to it if he would go to therapy, which he is, but it doesn't seem to be doing anything.
She feels guilty and doesn't want to just abandon him but if this goes onward it's just going to keep her from being happy, whether it's with myself or someone else. How do I get her to just leave this guy to his fate? Or better, how do I get this dude the help he needs?
TL;DR: | Girl's ex is a manipulative psycho and therapy isn't solving shit. How do we get this guy out of her life? |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: Unlawful Firearm Possession. Am I screwed for life?
POST: I live in Tennessee in the USA. I got stuck with an Unlawful Possession of a Firearm charge by giving a guy a ride from my apartment complex. Here's what happened:
I lived in a bad area of Nashville. It was 2012 or so. I broke my leg and couldn't work, but I had a car and most people in this area did not have one, so I became a taxi service. It ruined my life.
It's the first of the month and everyone is getting their government checks, so it was a busy day for me. 2 guys offer me twenty bucks to give them a ride to walmart 2 minutes away to cash their checks.
Evidently the idiot that sat up front had a gun with him, and sat it by the arm rest in the middle of my front seat. I sit right outside the entrance and they go in. A Walmart employee comes to my passenger window and tells me I need to find a parking spot. I guess he saw the gun sitting by the armrest and called the police.
So my two "clients" come back out, get in. I start to drive off, and I am surrounded by 5 cop cars and they draw guns on me and yank us all out of the car. "WHERES THE GUN!? WHERES THE FUCKING GUN!?" I have no idea what theyre talking about.
So this idiot that I gave the ride to won't claim that it is his gun, so you guessed it, I get stuck with it.
I did 14 days in jail and had a ton of fines etc. Just recently lost my license because of it.
I didn't think it would effect me that bad because it was a non violent misdemeanor. I lost my job shortly after due to a yearly background check. Couldn't find another job for a long time, and of course the one I do find is minimum wage. I've lost out of many jobs I am qualified for, but it gets to the "Okay drug and background check and we'll get you started!" and never hear back from them.
TL;DR: | Gave a guy a ride to walmart, he left a gun in my car and I got stuck with the charge because he wouldn't claim his weapon. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I [18/M] have been hanging out with this girl for several months, not sure whether I should start dating her
POST: * OK, I have been hanging out with this girl for several months now. We are really good friends, and we have a lot in common. We don't get together a lot, but probably once a month or so. I would like to more, and I think she would too, but our schedules only rarely match up. However, we talk on Facebook and text a lot, so we keep up that way. The thing is, most of our times hanging out, weren't what I would call dates, just good friends spending time together. I really would like to start actually dating her, but I am afraid that If she says no, I will lose what I have in her as a friend even. I think she would like to date me too, but I am not sure. What should I do? Should I just go for it and ask her? Or just stay good friends?
TL;DR: | I have been hanging out with this girl for several months, and now I am not sure if I should ask her to date for real. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: Can't deal with rejection anymore. I feel unlovable.
POST: Hello ladies and gentlemen, I've been pretty depressed lately for a reason that I find very embarrassing... It may sound like a stupid problem for some of you, but it has been bothering me for a couple years now.
I am incapable of "getting" the women I am attracted to. Let me clarify. Every time I meet a girl that I am sexually and intellectually attracted to I cannot move forward to something serious, casual, or anything. I am shut down almost every time.
I don't know what is wrong with me. I am intelligent, I live a somewhat healthy lifestyle, I am always exercising, I am not unattractive, and yet women seem to be extremely cold towards me.
I am tired of not receiving any affection. I miss caring about someone who cares about me.
I feel alone.
A month ago I met this pretty cool girl from one of my classes. She is funny, smart, and seems to really enjoy my company while we have Biochemistry Lab together. We exchanged numbers and started txting each other. And that was it. It's like the same movie over and over again. They seem super interested and as soon as I show interest I get shot down. They either don't reply to my txts, or just reply with one word. Every time that happens I feel like I have some sort of problem and it's my fault..
I've been dealing with rejection since I can remember, and I've got pretty good at masking my depressive side away. But it's been getting harder lately.
Every time I go out with my friends I feel like they "get all the love" from the other women even though I am as sociable and talkative.
Sorry if this is long, the feelings are pouring out as I'm writing.
TL;DR: | I never get to be with the person I'm interested in. It's eating me inside and I am very depressed about it. I feel like I am unlovable. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My exwife [39F] wants to attend my [39M] wedding. My girlfriend [29F] and I don't want her there.
POST: I married my ex wife at 22. We were high school sweethearts and got together at 16. I've known since a very young age that children were not going to be in my future. I had no interest in becoming a father at any point in my life. I know some people change their minds but for me it was a sure thing. My ex claimed she also didnt want children. We had a blissful marriage until we were 30 when she said she wanted children. I still didnt want children. This led to a lot of fighting and we eventually divorced at 32.
Even after we divorced she still had quite close relations with my family. I think everyone was shocked that we got divorced as we seemed to be happy. Eventually i told my parents and siblings i was uncomfortable having her around after the divorce and the relations faded away. 3 years later I met my current girlfriend and we are getting married soon. My girlfriend is sterilised and doesn't want children so we're much more compatible. My ex wife has contact with some of my cousins on social media so I assume thats how she found out. She congratulated me and asked for invitations to the wedding. Is it wrong of me to not want her there? She's not a bad or crazy ex and I know she won't cause any trouble or do anything spiteful. I just don't want her there. I want her completely out of my life. I kind of want to pretend she doesn't exist at all. Is that childish or petty? My girlfriend supports my decision to not invite her. I just want some some validation from reddit. Thanks.
TL;DR: | ex wife wants to attend my wedding. She's not a crazy ex or a bad person. I still don't want her there. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [16 M] and sister [13 F] living in house with dad's [55 M] heroin addict girlfriend [40 F] since august 2015
POST: Last summer while my sister and I were away at grandma's house on the opposite coast, my dad moved his girlfriend of about 3 months into the house. He said that she was a professional cook and he would frequently shower her with compliments and also require my sister and I do so as well.
My dad travels a lot for his job, in total he was gone probably ~3 months of the entire year for work. During these time periods, if my mom who has an abusive boyfriend was not available to care for us (most of the time) he would leave us with his new girlfriend.
The house would then change, no groceries would be bought and we had no money despite my dad leaving her money every time he left. She also brought her ex boyfriend [25] over who I now know was supplying her with drugs. He recently stole a car and the detectives came to our house and questioned us about it. Anyway, my sister and I missed a lot of school because of this and our lives went really downhill. The girlfriend at one point stole my $800 guitar which was gifted to me years ago and I learned to play on it. She has now admitted to taking it and offered to return it from the pawn shop.
I know the obvious answer is call CPS but now we are planning to move to grandma's state before the summer ends and we do not want to disturb our dad who has thwarted our desire to move there our entire lives. Without him it will be much more difficult or impossible to transition to the new state. If calling CPS angers him to the point of blocking our move, which he can do with his financial position, and we can move out of the house anyway, should I still call CPS and get her out? Or should I just wait out the storm and leave this place and everything with it behind?
TL;DR: | Call CPS and get her out for the short remainder of my time here or just get out and avoid the drama but possibly allow her to keep living here? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [27 M] judgement of whether to leave current gf [27] may be clouded by another girl
POST: I've been with my "girlfriend" (in quotes because we're currently in limbo) for what would soon be 3 years. It has been a great relationship with lots of up and not much down, we are very compatible as people, we have a great lifestyle and sex life and I have imagined for a long time now that she is absolutely the girl I should marry.
However for the last 6 months or so we have had repeated issues with arguments. She is a girl that prides herself on being selfless but when she does, even if inadvertently, say or do something hurtful she is incredibly stubborn and will not admit it and never ever apologise for it.
After trying to sweep this under the rug it has happened with increasing frequency to the point where it results in temporary breakups every few weeks now. The arguments are often over nothing but they escalate massively because I can't handle not ever being apologised to.
Now bizarrely she has started attributing these issues to "cultural differences" but I have never dated someone of my own culture and never had this issue before, and her using that as an excuse really disappointed me to the point where I started seriously considering leaving.
After the last argument and "break up that is a break up until one or the other decides to sweep the issues under the rug" another girl I know started making advances on me, and being quite forward about it. I'm starting to wonder whether she is clouding my judgement of whether or not I should continue trying to sort things out with my gf/ex gf.
One thing to note.. my gf/ex gf is gorgeous and I have always been extremely attracted to her, but this other girl is also unbelievably attractive, like celebrity status, I can't even believe my eyes sometimes. I wonder if that is making me bias.
TL;DR: | In limbo with gf of 3 years due to silly issues, attracting to another girl interested in me may be clouding my judgement about where to go from here |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How do I [24, M] know when I can be friends again with my ex [22, M] of two years?
POST: I'll try to keep it short.
Me and my ex broke up about two weeks ago. He broke up with me and we ended on good terms. I've had a lot of support from my friends and family and decided to cut all contact with him. During our break-up, he kept saying how he loves me as a friend. He loves me as one of his best friends and he would still like to be friends some time in the future.
We have the same friend group and it's been tough on our friends. I've also realized that I don't know myself and I don't know my feelings well enough to be able to tell when I am okay with being friends with my ex again.
TL;DR: | How does one tell if they are emotionally ready to be friends again with an ex? Is it possible to be best friends with an ex? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [26F] relationship with my boyfriend of four years [24M] needs some work
POST: To start, I want to just say that I need help repairing this relationship. I need some help figuring out how to say what I need to say without causing a fight. *I do not want to break up with my SO.*
My SO and I have lived together for a couple of years now. We have a lovely apartment that we keep clean for the most part.
My SO can be very difficult to talk to, so I need some help finding the words to say.
I want to tell him he is selfish. He doesn't give a shit about a single thing that I enjoy, and he doesn't pretend to. I put a lot of effort into his hobbies, and I do my best to be supportive, and I receive nothing in return. My hobbies have taken the back burner to the extreme. I hardly do anything I enjoy anymore because if I ask him for help/his opinion, just to get him to acknowledge me, he gets pissy.
He doesn't do anything romantic. He never buys me a surprise gift, or takes me anywhere nice, or makes me feel beautiful, or anything. If I ask him to go somewhere with me, and he can't find a way that the trip would somehow benefit him, he throws a fit and is an asshole the entire trip and the rest of the night.
He treats his friends and family so well. He talks nicely to them, he shows an interest in the things they talk about that he obviously has no real interest in (he complains later), but when it comes to me he is completely different.
He tells me that it is because he shouldn't have to hide from me. That he should never have to sugar-coat how he feels.. That he should be able to be honest with me, even if that means swearing at me, or saying the most extreme/exaggerated thing to get his honest point across.
How do I say all of this without sounding like a dick?
TL;DR: | I need help trying to get my point across that I don't feel special in this relationship without sounding inconsiderate/unappreciative. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I think I went about this all wrong. Thoughts?
POST: I went out on a date with a guy I've had a crush on for quite some time. The date went very well, in fact he asked me to join him for dinner that same day. During dinner I was showing him pictures of my dogs on my iPhone. Upon scrolling he stopped me to look at a "private" picture I had sent to my ex-boyfriend (when we were together). He commented that he wanted that picture, so being flattered, I sent it to him.
He soon left for a business trip and will every now and then text me that he wants more pictures. So seeings how I have a crush on him, I have sent him a few.
TL;DR: | I've sent lingerie modeling pics to a guy I have a crush on. I think he only views me as some girl who is only worth a text every now and then to get sexy photos. |
SUBREDDIT: r/needadvice
TITLE: Beyond frustrated with my life, and feel like I'm in quicksand. Help.
POST: I'm gonna try to keep it brief..
Im F, 27, currently living with my parents. I lived on my own last year and loved it, but due to some stupid financial decisions and also having to help out my sister with an emergency car payment, my debt began to grow and it now seems like it won't ever be paid off (its $9,000). I moved home to try to save money but It seems like every time I go to pay a big chunk of my credit card off..some stupid bill pops up, or whatever. It's not that I don't like living with my parents, but they both smoke and it just makes me physically sick to even walk in the house. I work for an amazing company, but my job consists of people yelling at me all day because their products aren't working, and sometimes it just feels like too much to take. Not to get into the love life thing cause I know its not allowed, but I've spent a year on and off with a guy who doesn't want more than sort-of boyfriend/friend with benefit, and he treats me like shit.
TL;DR: | There is not one good situation in my life right now it seems, and it continues to get worse. Reddit, how can I get my life back on track and begin to turn these situations around? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Relationship spiral of doom
POST: Vital stats: me guy 27 SO woman 27 married for two years. Dated for 4 years prior to marriage. Share a lovely dog and apartment.
We are wrestling with married life malaise, we both have stressful career transitions upcoming, and recently had a few close friends move out of town. Our sex life is sparse and unsatisfying, we are arguing frequently and I am hoping to avoid the relationship death spiral if possible. I don't feel like my wife is putting effort into improving our relationship, while we communicate well we don't solve any of our problems. After marriage she stopped exercising regularly, watches TV at all times that she is not working, and rarely takes the initiative in our social or intimate life. In our arguments she never admits fault for anything and accuses me of being negative towards all aspects of life. I feel this is unfair but will admit that upcoming career changes have me worried. I am frustrated that she doesn't appear to be interested in looking for a job outside of the current city that we live in, she carries debt from before we were married but refuses to tell me how much it is, and seems closer to her father than her husband.
To place credit where it is due, she is a very kind intelligent person and while we are having serious physical intimacy problems (infrequent sex in one position of her choice, sex is used as a motivator rather than a show of intimacy, she does not allow foreplay, and she has body issues after living a sedentary life for the last couple of years ) we share some good moments and are comfortable (too much?). To wrap this up, I find myself becoming verbally mean to her during our increasingly frequent arguments, I believe that the reason for this is that I have lost respect for a lot of the choices she has made. My behavior is not acceptable and I need to either come to terms with our limitations or walk. Are there any married folks or folks in long term relationships that have recovered from similar problems? Any advice? If you have made it this far, thanks :)
TL;DR: | Wife takes relationship for granted, I lost some respect for her, wondering if anyone has advice on how to break out of argument spiral. |
SUBREDDIT: r/weddingplanning
TITLE: Wedding Showers with FH and Guest Questions
POST: Hello friends! Sorry in advance for the wall of text.
My aunt has very generously offered to throw a wedding shower for me after FH proposed. I'm meeting with her this weekend and I think the plan for this will come up. So two questions for y'all:
1) I would really prefer to have it be a 'wedding shower' not a 'bridal shower.' I'm not the only one getting married, and also FH is pretty awesome, I would really prefer if he was there too. And I hate being the center of attention, so I figure we can both awkwardly be the center of attention.
2) My aunt has asked me to come up with the guest list...who is traditionally invited to this? For some background, the wedding is happening in Minnesota, where FH and I live, and where my aunt lives. And where the shower will be. But our friends are spread out across the country, and FH's family are all more than a 12 hour drive away. FH's family have also rumbled about maybe doing something back on the east coast in his home state, so there might be two showers. For people who don't live in the immediate area of either location, do you invite them to both and let them choose what works best? Does that come off as trying to score more gifts? I don't want to seem like we are angling for the gifts, but I know for me I would love an option if I was planning to travel out of town for a whole weekend.
TL;DR: | is it weird to have FH at wedding shower? And how to handle out of town guests when two showers are happening. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My girlfriend [25F] thinks my job is more important to me [23M] than she is. Am I being selfish?
POST: I have a question concerning my relationship (together for 6 months).
I love my girlfriend like crazy. I've had three relationships before but I've never met anyone who was this intelligent, funny and generally a good person. In fact, I couldn't imagine a life without her at the moment.
But there's this one thing. We start to fight about my job fairly often in the last couple of weeks. I'm an entrepreneur and I still study at university at the same time. This basically means that I work 8am-6pm, sometimes with university in between during the day. I sometimes work longer hours (ie up to 9pm) but I try to limit those days and have them when we didn't want to meet up after work. I live in the city I work at whereas she comes from outside but also studies in this city. So sometimes she's done with university at 4pm whereas I'm still working in my office (just a little outside the city). She doesn't understand that I simply can't take my time off work when there's still things to be done and I need to work from my computer. She constantly mentions how much time I spend at work even tough I still have all the weekend to hang out with her. The point is, she's a student but she also works on the side (just not that much). I've never complained about that, I think it's a great thing.
I'm worried about what will happen if I have bigger obligations in the future. I don't know if she can be there to support me and I also don't know if I'm being selfish by not being more flexible about my work. I know that she has to constantly adapt to my working schedule but isn't that logical? Am I being selfish?
I will quit my company (I work with another guy) next April and start studying in a different city full time. She knows my plan. The city is not that far away so I won't need to move anywhere and I can stay where I'm at now.
Thanks for your help.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend thinks I work too much but as an entrepreneur that's the time I need to invest. She also blames me for being more interested in the company than in her even though I spend quite some time with her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I 26[f] almost had sex with with a good friend of my bf 26[m] while we were broken up. We are back together, he found out, and he doesn't believe we didn't do anything.
POST: We had been together 6 years when I decided I needed to be single for a while. We broke up and about 3 months later I was hanging out with my cousins and a mutual friend of me and my ex. We were all drinking a lot. I had drank too much so the friend was trying to make me go to sleep and took me to my room. I tried coming on to him but he was reluctant. After a few minutes he freaked out realizing that I was his friend's ex and left. The next day I was writing this all down in my journal trying to figure out why the hell I did that because I still respect my ex and wouldn't want to hurt him. At the time I didn't even think it would cause problems for the friend because I was only thinking of myself. I regretted even trying to do anything.
Fast forward a few more months and my ex and I get back together. After a few weeks of everything going great I come home one day and he says he read my journal. He thinks I had sex with his friend and is pretty much heart broken over it. He talked to his friend who told him it was all me coming on to him (which it was) and that he didn't do anything with me. I told him nothing happened and it was a drunken mistake. I still don't think he believes me though cause he'll bring it up randomly. I know he feels hurt that his friend and I could betray him like that but nothing happened and we were broken up at the time. Should I feel guilty over this? I already went though feeling guilty over it and thought it was over. I do feel bad for the fact I could have put their friendship in jeopardy but am glad we didn't go though with anything.
TL;DR: | Broke up w/ long-term bf, almost had sex with one of his best friends but didn't. Got back together and he feels betrayed. Should I feel guilty? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I have two cousins who deserve a parade in their honor but will never get one. Who is the biggest unsung hero you know personally?
POST: This couple had a son, let's call him R, about 3 years younger than me. He has many disabilities. He is deaf/mute, legally blind and severely autistic. He was a sweet boy (now man) but undoubtedly a handful. When he was about 6 they adopted another boy, J. J has down's syndrome, does not speak, and will also never be able to live alone.
My cousins and their adult children live a quiet rural life, and are the sweetest people I have ever had the honor to meet. I wish their could be a holiday in their honor, but I know the wouldn't go for that.
TL;DR: | Couple of my cousins have a severely disabled child, then go out and adopt another severely disabled child because they are superheros. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU By not knowing what "Mile High Club" meant
POST: Heard the "mile high club" saying for the first time on that COD4 bonus mission a few years ago. Since then, I had heard it thrown around a few times on T.V. and stand up comedy. Using contextual hints, I came to the wrong deduction that the saying is an expression for joining a group of "Ace's" or people who've done cool things, or simply to describe a blissful moment.
I started using it as an every day saying around friends and siblings without receiving any form of correction; "OH I'M SO HAPPY! I FEEL LIKE I JOINED THE MILE HIGH CLUB!"
Today, I was working a shift at my telemarketing job. I was having a really crappy sales day which intensified with every "DIIING!" I'd hear from coworkers getting up to pound the sales bell. 15 minutes before the end of my shift, it finally happened. A well of glee invaded me as I skipped merrily towards the bell, giving it the loudest wack I could swing. As I strut back to my desk, I boastfully gloat at my peers: "Finally, I'm in the mile high club! Thought I'd never catch up to you guys."
An awkward silence fills my row before a co-worker turns around with a confused look and retorts:
"are you sure you should be saying stuff like that at work? I don't think that means what you think it means..."
Naturally, I return to my desk just as confused as my peers. Lo and behold, a quick google search solved what seemed to be years worth of slang miss-use.
TL;DR: | I obliviously compared my work performance achievements to having sex on a plane in front of my boss and co-workers. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Mixed Signals
POST: Hey There Reddit I am in a bit of a problem with a girl I really like and I am not sure what to do
I have known this girl (age 16) for my whole high school life (I am 17). She is stunningly attractive but what is even better is her fantastic personality. Only recently have we begun to hang out a lot more then usual but I really am not sure whether she likes me. She says certain things that make me think she likes me but then all of a sudden there is something else or someone else that makes me think that I am just over-analyzing.
For instance she is currently in a relationship with someone for about a couple of weeks and I get the feeling she doesn't like him that much. She would be talking to someone else about relationships and how they never last but she would be looking at me and not the person. She speaks fluent Japanese (although she is European) and I have only recently been able to translate some of the messages she has written to me saying that she loves me. But I can't tell whether she is joking or not GOD DAMN EMOTICONS. I brought it up and she tried to change topic.
She likes the same things I do and she invites me to concerts and things and has just asked me to go for a picnic (just the two of us). Now you guys are probably thinking that I am being stupid and that it is obviously something happening but she seems to have the same attitude and behavior around other people.
At the moment I have treated our *thing* as a friendship which I am sure most girls like but it is in fear that if I say anything I will either be rejected or humiliated.
TL;DR: | Girl I like sending mixed signals. Her personality is a gift and a curse and I am not sure whether to say something or make a move. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What do you think happens to us when we die?
POST: I think that death could be a dream world or something like it. I can't really back it up with anything. Except when we are sleeping, we are unconscious in reality, but sometimes conscious in our dreams. Also, no one knows exactly why we dream. In sleep, we are the closest to death that we will ever be in our life.
Our heart rate drops, our body mostly relaxes, we become unconscious and, what I like to think, is as we get closer to death in sleep we begin to fade into death or this "dream world" and just get a faint idea of it.
That's why we rarely dream lucidly, and we cannot really control when or how we dream. That's a set of abilities reserved for the fully dead. We can only get a glimpse. A small fade. We can catch that glimpse but there is always a shroud or vale making it difficult to fully grasp it.
Also, maybe the would explain why highly stressed people often don't remember as many of their dreams, as they aren't as slowed or relaxed, while happy or truly relaxed people do remember. Or maybe I'm just crazy.
TL;DR: | I like to think that when we die, we are simply immersed into an eternal lucid dream. And it sounds kind of pleasant. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU and was mistaken for a pedophile
POST: Today, it was really nice out so I decided to take my dog for a walk in the woods nearby. I brought a joint to toast along the way, as I do sometimes to spice things up. What could go wrong right?
Everythings as usual, I'm enjoying my carefree afternoon. I decide to leave, stumble out of the woods realize the local elementary students have been let out. I'm thoroughly blazed by this point.
Suddenly, my little brother and classmates being sheparded home by the safeties. He doesn't see me at first, so I'm walking fast trying to catch he and his friends. He turns around and begins talking to me, letting everyone go ahead.
Teachers take notice of suspicious hooded man walking out of woods & start walking over
"Hey, how do you know John?!
"....I'm his brother" I eventually stuttered.
"ok."
She quickly ushered him away in disbelief.
Then I realized what just happened. I behaved EXACTLY LIKE A PEDOPHILE. It also didn't help I had a grill lighter hanging out my pocket because I lost my other one. Fuck.
TL;DR: | Scared teacher by walking out of shady as fuck woods, approached her children and tried talking to one while ripped on some dank. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: AskReddit, I'm 20 years old and I feel like all hope is lost...
POST: Throwaway.
To begin with, I'm stuck in school pursuing a bachelor's degree in political science and global development. I'd like to start by saying that I absolutely hate my program. In fact, I hate the whole idea of a bachelor of arts degree. What's the point? It's not like you can do anything good with it. My marks certainly aren't good enough to go to law school. But...I'm done two and a half years so I figure I might as well stay in it. High school kids, unless you want to be stuck in a class full of douchebags who complain about the world and offer no solutions on how to fix it, don't take global development studies.
This brings me to my next point. I'm atrociously single. In high school, I had three or four relationships. One of them was serious and lasted for all of my senior year and my freshman year at college. In my sophomore year at college, I broke up with her. Ever since, I haven't been the same. I've spiraled into an overweight, weed-addicted bum who has lost all ambition. I mean seriously. I don't care enough to get in shape, to try hard in school, to pursue ANY type of romantic relationship...
(side story: I've liked this girl since the beginning of my sophomore year of university. Throughout the last year, became good friends. I got friend zoned. Totally still in love with girl. She totally has no feelings for me like that, which I know for a fact. Ugh.)
Reddit, what can I do to get motivated again? I've become so pessimistic and cynical about life and it's starting to really affect my future. I know alot of you are going to say something like "man up, you don't have real problems"" but I mean, this just happens to be my situation. Thoughts?
TL;DR: | I'm 20 years old, in college, overweight, addicted to weed and single. What can I do to get motivated again? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [20M] with my [22F] gf, 7 months on a second time around. I want to end it, but her b-day is in 3 days.
POST: So I've been seeing her for 7 months now on a second try. We have only seen each other around 7 times total since. I've developed a strong sense of loneliness, especially when seeing other couples on a daily basis being happy as can be. She seems to be a lot more invested in me than I her.
I want to break it off, but her birthday is on the 13th. I feel as though that's one of the worst times to do so. I also don't want to continue to lead her on, as that is bad too. I'm not sure if I should just end it and face the inevitable whiplash of "I don't understand" and yabba.
TL;DR: | I want to break up with my gf, her b-day is on the 13th. Good or bad idea? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Ladies, can we have a discussion about the infamous "Friend Zone"?
POST: I want to have a clarification between the ideas of the friend zone being what women use to distinguish between potential people to date and people who they want nothing more than a friendship. From what I have seen, most men feel this is a dreaded placement of an abysmal situation of remaining single forever (or at least never receiving the girl that chase after).
There's two sides to this arguement: One side says that once the guy has been put in the friend zone, he should cut his losses and try another girl and/or at another time. This isn't to say he cuts her off completely, but just stops trying to date her. The other side says the person who is the "friend zone"-er is at fault for not giving the "friend zone" -ee a chance at love, despite the fact that the "friend zone" -er probably isn't attracted to them in the first place. Since I never get to hear the woman's perspective, I was wondering what the women might think.
Personally, I agree with the former. If she isn't attracted to you, you can try to sway her into lust/love or whatever you want to from her, but you shouldn't be upset at her for not wanting anything to do with you. If you spend more time trying to learn about how people are by dating or befriending the people who do find you attractive/appealing, you might have a better chance at being less upset about your history of relationships than trying to fight this stupendously uphill battle of trying to win a person's heart. I've tried all the tricks and seen all the situations, so I speak solely from experience.
Also, I'm not ignorant to the fact that women have also been "friend zoned" and I wanted to hear that side as well. As well as any gay situations. No discrimination here.
TL;DR: | Do you believe that the problem of the friend zone is on from pressure of the "friend zone" -er or the "friend zone" -ee? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Long time friend keeps bailing on me for other plans and it's been getting me down. How do I address this?
POST: So my friend and I have had tentative plans to watch the world cup together for months. So far these plans have not come to fruition. He's been out of town for a couple weeks and I had to go take care of my ailing mother so no big deal.
Two days ago I texted him to see if he was back in town. If he was, I was going to see if he wanted to watch the game with me. Turns out he beat me to the punch. He said "yeah I get back tomorrow night (which is last night). want to watch the USA game on sunday?" I responded enthusiastically "heck yeah!" and left it at that since he was gonna be on a plane for like 4 hours minimum.
So I call him this morning to flesh out our plans and he tells me he's gonna be watching the game with people from his indoor soccer team. WTF?! After having been looking forward to this for weeks, I'm super deflated. I wanted to be like dude wtf we had plans on the phone but I was caught completely off guard. Surely he wouldn't flake this time, given that we've been planning this for months and he's the one who suggested it! So as usual I was polite and we talked for a few mins and hung up.
He pulled a similar stunt when I hosted a Super Bowl party. Not long before kick off I called him to see where he was and he told me he was going to another party.
I won't bother listing all the times he's bailed, but my gf has noticed his flakiness too and has said I need to address it. But how? Conversations like these are pretty foreign among guys (at least in my experience). We just don't talk about our feelings as much. The predominant mentality is that getting upset over something like this means you need to get better grip on your emotions, but I don't think just continuing to stuff it down is going to work for me.
TL;DR: | long time friend keeps bailing on me for other plans and it's been getting me down. How do I address this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I (25M) be worried that my gf (25F) seems less close over the last week?
POST: Ok the short of is this. Since Monday we haven't talked as much as usual and she's been calling me by my name instead of babe or any other pet name. The sane part of my mind thinks worrying about this is just dumb, the insane part of me thinks its because she hates me and is going to breakup.
But there are a few things I keep telling myself. Saturday when we went to a wedding she was close, hugging and kissing me, we even fooled around a little before her food poisoning from her breakfast kicked in. Monday she felt like shit and I only got to see her for 10 minutes before she got called into work to fix something. She didn't answer a random text I sent her Tuesday night and Wednesday I just didn't text her. I had lunch with her today and she said she's been tired all week. She also has friends from out of town that she's been hanging out with. Tuesday was the last night one of them was going to be here, and Wednesday she went to dinner with the other. I completely trust her so thats no issue for me.
We've just texted less and its nothing all lovey dovey like "babe" or "cutie". This weekend I'll be out of town so I won't see her and maybe that'll let us both recharge our batteries so to speak. So my question is, should I really be worrying? The other thing, is if things are getting stale and she's getting bored what should I do to correct this. I really like her, we've been dating since May. If she didn't want to see me she wouldn't have suggested lunch.
TL;DR: | I feel like things aren't as good as they were. What can I do to change them? Or am I just making problems where they don't exist? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: My friend spilled a jug of semen on my hair?
POST: My friend has been collecting his own semen in a fridge for months. He claimed he ejaculated into it via masturbatory methods every night. It was a jug about 1 liter in volume, and it was nearly full.
He showed me this jug because I doubted his claim that he had accomplished such a ridiculous feat. He removed the jug from his fridge and I was astounded, for it was a jug of semen.
He then took off the lid and smelled the contents. He then held the jar high, against the light on the ceiling, and examined it. I was revolted and jumped up sharply, accidentally striking his arms, knocking the jug, in such a way that the jug spilled about half of its contents into my hair, over my head.
I was absolutely disgusted. I was essentially drenched in semen. My friend is mad at ME, because I "wasted" half of his "collection". He was almost crying. Seriously.
I know I was the one who knocked the jug, but I feel he is in the wrong here. Yet he is claiming I am in the wrong. Who is right?
TL;DR: | Accidentally knocked a half a jar of semen over on my head, and my friend (the semen owner) is angry. Who is right?* |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What is the weirdest enocunter you or someone you know has had from meeting someone from craigslist?
POST: A few months ago my wifes car had gone down, so I called a person from CL, a mobile mechanic, to come look at it. As soon as I made eye contact with him, I could tell there was something shady about him. So he checks her car out and says, "I think it's this, I dont have my diagnostic tool, but I can comeback in the morning and check it all out." I said what kind of mechanic are you that doesn't have all your tools with you. He said he let his friend borrow it and he would get it back this evening. He begins to tell me that I owe him $80 for the diagnostic fee. I say i'm not paying you sense you did not properly diagnose my car. He gets angry and leaves. He texts me the next morning and asks if I still need him to come out to check on the car. I tell him no and he proceeds to cuss me out and tell me I'm a POS. I say thank you, and have a good day. So a couple of months roll around and I see the same guy on the news for exposing himself to kids at an elementary school. Not cool.
TL;DR: | Had a mobile mechanic from CL looks at my wifes car. A few months later, he's in jail for indecent exposure at an elementary school. Always trust your gut instinct, it very rarely steers you wrong! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [19M] disrespected my girlfriend [19F] before we started dating
POST: So I don't really know how to go about telling this story, it's a long one...
Last summer I met my now girlfriend on tinder. I really assumed it would be a one time hookup but we really connected. She was pretty drunk when we first met and we had sex.
We kept talking and almost went exclusive when I got cold feet and backed out at the last second. We kept having casual sex while she always wanted more.
I disrespected her to my friends and called her a slut I just used to fuck when I really liked someone else, which wasn't true. I also have a very promiscuous past which upsets her.
About 6 months ago I went for and we became exclusive and started dating. We've since seen each other every day and I truly love her. I think she's the one.
She has seen the nasty things I've said about her and says she understands, but still throws up when she reads them. I am worried she'll never get over them. She also often guilts me about it and makes me feel shitty.
I was also very hesitant to say I loved her until I meant it which took a while and offended her. In August, I said I love you in a friendly way to a female friend which really really upset her and she still guilts me and makes me feel shitty about that all the time to.
When the horrible things I've done come up i always profusely apologize while she makes me feel like shit about it. We fight a lot but also really love each other. We are also each others first SOs (maybe I'm young and naive).
I don't know how to react other than feel sad and apologize when she guilts me for the things I've done. I'm really not sure what to do. I am confident we'll move past it but it's very hard sometimes. Any advice?
TL;DR: | I was bad to my girlfriend before we started dating and she always guilts me about it and I don't know what to do |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Mixed signals from 22f. What do you think? (23m)
POST: I met a girl at a friend's little party a couple months ago, but we didn't talk much. About a month later, I saw her again at a swing dance, and she seemed surprised and happy to see me. We danced some and parted ways at the end of the night, and I didn't think anything of her at the time.
A couple days later, she messaged me on Facebook and we ended up chatting for several hours, getting to know each other, along with a lot of playful banter that I interpreted as flirting, but of course, it's just Facebook chat, so intent is hard to gauge. We've continued to chat over Facebook every day ever since (it's been almost two weeks.) One particular comment involved a joke picture we had taken at the party I met her at, where I had my shirt open, bare-chested, and she said it was "a little bit sexy ;) *wink wink*"
At this point I thought "She's definitely into me."
During one of our conversations, however, my confusion arose.
To give you some context, we were talking about how we're both non-religious in a very Christian environment, to which she said **"That's one of the reasons I don't date," (!)** and then we were kind of poking fun at our peers who got married and had kids way too young, and she mentioned how she once told a good male friend that she would be happy staying single the rest of her life as long as they can stay friends. (Notice how the wording wasn't directed at me, so I feel like she was just talking, not necessarily "trying to tell me something." We've been very open about our history and telling stories about our past ever since we started talking.)
Still, my reaction at that point was "Oh, I guess she just wants to be friends," but I feel like there's still been a certain level of flirting in our conversations, and she even brought up the "sexy" picture another time, so I'm just not sure how to read her.
TL;DR: | Girl approached me, started conversation with me, started flirting with me, then in incidental conversation, mentions she "doesn't date" and that she's happy to stay single forever as long as she has good friends. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Me [30M] asking a girl from work [20s F] for a coffee/tea and a conversation
POST: So, there's a girl at work I quite like. Not sure how she feels about me, thinks she thinks I am okay. She is relatively new, a few weeks now, so we have had a few conversations. I was quick to say hi and the like (I'm normally shy, but had to do it).
At my work we have our own desks, not designated to a specific person, maybe a little unofficially, but generally first come first serve. Anyway, for the first week she'd play Nintendo DS a fair bit on breaks, so I'd sit a few times with her. Since then (only a couple weeks) she has been more to herself, that is to say, staying at her desk during breaks, perhaps doing schoolwork, as it is finals time.
So, I'm thinking of asking her to have a conversation over a coffee or tea. I guess the best way would be while we're on break, or I was thinking if she was by her PC on break, asking if she'd like to go for a walk. A walk in this case being inside, as there is a lot of inside space 'outside' my work.
I also want to keep it organic, that is to say, be myself, but figured I'd post here for some advice/thoughts. Thanks!
TL;DR: | Best way to go about asking a girl I know a little, and get along with out to coffee/tea and a chat. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21F] with my boyfriend [21 M] of 8 months; how to deal with jealousy of other couples?
POST: I've been going out with my boyfriend for 8 months now. We are in college together, and spent the first 4 months at school, and then 4 months in the summer - most of which was spent apart, with 2 long vacations together. It's been really good so far, apart from some small bumps of feeling insecure about his feelings for me at the beginning as I was much more affectionate than he is, and over the summer I felt like the relationship was surprisingly great.
Now we have been back at school together for about 2 weeks, and it's been a little weird adjusting to a schedule after spending all our time/none of our time together (and not having any options), but the main problem that has risen up for me is jealousy of other couples. I enjoy our relationship and spending time with him, and we have a lot of both meaningful and fun experiences/conversations. However, I can't help but compare myself to my friends' relationships, which are generally more affectionate and romantic than mine is. It's mostly stuff that I wouldn't/didn't really care about (e.g. giving flowers), but it's also made me think about how I tend to be more affectionate than he is and am more likely to go out of my way to "show" him I care about him (gifts, organising things to do, etc.). I also appreciate, though, that people have different ways of showing and receiving love.
So, part of me thinks that maybe this is something I should talk to him about, because it is something that is genuinely upsetting me. On the other hand, I think that the fact that my jealousy only really started when we got back to school might be a sign that I should be the one to work on this, rather than him.
So what I would really appreciate is thoughts on how I should approach this, and also DEFINITELY some advice on how to deal with being jealous of other couples?
TL;DR: | Jealous of other couples since coming back to school; would like tips on how to deal with jealousy and also advice on whether to bring it up to boyfriend? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My girlfriend was sexually assaulted right before I was going to real up with her. [18 and 18]
POST: Im an 18 year old male currently in a long term relationship. I go to school at uchicago, and my 18 year old girlfriend is at u of I. Our relationship was very unhealthy and we had trust issues, but we foolishly decided to continue. She has been in school since August, but I just started last week. Every Time we talk it seems like a fight starts, and we dont talk very often. When I started college, I realize that I liked girls here and started forming connections, although I wouldn't cheat or anything. I finally decide to break up with her, and I called her today. She answered the phone crying, and said that a guy had taken advantage of her after a party, before I mentioned breaking up. I comforted her and heard the story, and did not break up with her. She said she didn't want to report it, which upsets me. I still don't want to continue the relationship, but I fell like I can't end it because she is so volnurable right now. What the heck am I to do? She visits in a week, and that will sorta set our relationship in stone to all of the girls that I know, and ruin the dynamic with them.
TL;DR: | I really want to break up with my girlfriend, preferably by next week, but she is a victim of sexuall assault and I feel the need to support her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 F] with my [25 M] boyfriend of five months, is it stupid/pointless to keep dating?
POST: We've been dating for about five months and both really enjoy each others company. So far we're very compatible and share a bunch of common interests. I really really like this guy, and its been a while since I've felt like this about someone.
But...there is one thing that bothers me and makes me wonder if its pointless to keep dating, despite the fact I really enjoy spending time with him. We have different expectations for our futures. I intend on having a family and he has no desire to have kids.
Now, I'm 24 years old and have no intention of marriage/kids/family for another good 6-8 years, so this is very very far away. I am in NO way trying to tie this guy down, I have zero interest in thinking about marriage any time soon... it has only been five months. But I'm just trying to figure out if it silly to continue dating if you know that eventually (if we even last that long) we will have different ideas for our life plans?
TL;DR: | I know I want kids, he knows he doesn't. Keep dating because its fun, or stop now before things go too far? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Dogtraining
TITLE: My 2nd dog has started sleeping with my roommate.
POST: I have 2 dogs & moved into a roommate housing situation 3 months ago. Recently, my younger (2 yr old) Shihpoo has taken to sleeping with my roommates. If I take her to bed with me, she whines & scratches to be let out to go sleep with the roommate.
Since this started I've been paying closer attention to the relationship dynamics between myself & both dogs & realized that my older dog (6 yr old terrier) has been displaying some odd behavior that may have something to do with this.
When I am petting/playing with younger dog, the terrier will come over to cuddle & work his way between me & the shihpoo. I've stopped interacting with the terrier when he does this & he's losing that behavior. However, the shihpoo won't come sit with me if the terrier is sitting next to me.
My shihpoo seems to be bonding more & more to my roommate. Since I work from home, I spend all day with the dogs & give the shihpoo daily training, multiple play times, trips outside for the bathroom, and grooming. My roommate feeds both dogs food from his plate frequently.
I don't mind the dog sleeping with my roommate - he lost his dog last year and I know he gets immense emotional fulfillment from having this dog so taken with him. My concern is when we move out - how do I ensure the shihpoo is still bonded to me & feels comfortable with me & the terrier?
TL;DR: | Want to ensure 2nd dog stays bonded with me & 1st dog for when we move out. How do I do this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/pettyrevenge
TITLE: Feel like stealing? Well, tit for tat.
POST: This happened a couple of days ago, but I just found this sub (Insta-sub, by the way) and I felt as if this belonged here. First time poster, pls don't punish me TOO hard daddies for any and all mistakes. Onto some backstory.
Siblings will fight over any inconsequential thing. This should come as no surprise to people with brothers and sisters, but sometimes they take your stuff without asking. All fine and dandy, I guess. But I got mad the other day, because this had been going on for a whole month, of her just constantly taking my stuff without asking, and just leaving it in her room, strewn about. She's taken everything from me, from expensive headphones, to chargers and culminating in my laptop lying precariously on her table, with about 2/3 of it off the table, with nothing but a miraculous chair being the only thing preventing my trusty jackintosh from meeting a fateful end.
Revenge? Simple. A taste of her own medicine. Taking her stuff, having it dangle off my bed, per example. This begins escalating until our ultimate confrontation, where I take her gym headphones and walk by her, when gives me a glare and asks if I had EVEN asked her to borrow her headphones. (The gall!) I then proceed to calmly answer by stating that I was simply surreptitiously borrowing something of hers, like she had done many times before. Total. Fucking. Silence.
I also used her toe-nail clipper and left delicious keratin remains behind c:
TL;DR: | Sister "borrows" a bunch of my shit, I plan my deliciously vapid revenge. By just taking a bunch of her shit. Never said I was an evil genius. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [26/M] with my [24F] GF of 6-7 years. Quick question.
POST: Hello,
I've posted on Dead Bedrooms a couple of times lately, but that's a symptom of the problem, I think.
I think the real problem, overall is that my GF and I are not wanting to live life at the same pace. She has a completely different attitude towards things than I do.
The situation: For the past 4 (FOUR!) years of our 6-1/2 year relationship, I've waited for her to finish school, I've watched as she did a piss-poor job of finding a job (her fault - I think I explained in the first post), but mostly I've just sat around kinda waiting, "Oh, things'll be fun eventually".
Recently, I've helped her with some of her problems, finally got her into therapy and some SSRIs for Anxiety and even still, 2+ months later, while she's showing signs of improving in a lot of areas, she's still not up to my pace (not saying my pace is good or her pace is bad - my pace is my pace. Hers is hers. That's that).
The decision: In a decision that's melded in my mind over the past few days, I've simply decided that I'm - **after 4 YEARS of her pace - I'm now going to simply live life at my pace** and if she doesn't want to keep up, then I guess we're through.
I'm not going to be malicious about this, I'm not going to be harsh - just very honest. I'm not going to mope on the couch with her at night, because she wants to mope on the couch. I'm still going to do what I want to do. If this breaks us up, fine - if not, woohoo.
My question: Is this a healthy or an unhealthy decision? It feels callous, but after 4/6 years at her speed, what the fuck else can I do?
TL;DR: | Been "waiting" for roughly 4 years of a 6-7 year relationship for things to get exciting. They haven't. I'm fed up. Does my question above make me a bastard? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: What to do and say about me [15M] asking girlfriend's [16F] dad to date her?
POST: So, me [15M] and my friend [16F] have liked eachother for about a month now. We just now decided to tell people and we thought it'd be easier if we just told our parents "hey I'm going on a date" or "hey, can I go on a date?" the latter of those two is what happened. When she asked her dad he seemed to be a little bit upset (even tho I think he likes me and I KNOW her family likes me) and said he needed to talk to me before the date. Well he couldn't talk to me before the date so he told her I needed to talk with him if I wanted to date her consistently and let her go on this date. Understandable. I should have asked him, but it just never really accured to me. I believe I will see him this Sunday, (along with the whole fam, most likely) so I was thinking about asking him/talking to him then. But what should I say? Should I say "I know I should have asked before Thursday and I'm sorry, but, can I date your daughter?" ? Help would be appreciated lol.
TL;DR: | What should I do about asking/talking to my girlfriends dad (and possibly her mom) about dating her and more importantly HOW should I ask/start the conversation? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M] with my GF [18 F] 3 years, I broke up with her 3rd week of school, we go to the same college.
POST: We pre-emptively took a break going into college. That lasted about 4 days. Big mistake. When we started talking again, i found out she hooked up with her best friend the same night we decided to take that pre-emptive break. I had always been suspicious of this person throughout our 3 years together, so it killed me.
We went through this awful on/off period for about a week. Kept saying she loved me and that there was no one else she wanted. I couldn't take it anymore. According to her, she wanted to make it work but wanted her own circle of friends, didnt want to bring me to parties most of the time, and had an issue with seeing me routinely (is once a day really too frequent? like come on). It felt like she wanted me to break up with her the whole time. I couldn't take it anymore.
Basically, I broke up with her 3 weeks into school. I bump into her at least once a day. Our school's campus is very small. I found out from other friends that they have seen her fooling around with douch-ey guys at parties (after having separated, so technically not cheating, just moved on way quicker than i would have liked).
I desperately want to move on and socialize, but all I really want to do is keep to myself and sulk. I have no good friends at the moment, I don't really connect with anyone yet. I have social anxiety to begin with, so this just further agitates the issue. I don't know what to do.
TL;DR: | Brokeup with gf 3 weeks into school. Small campus so I see her all the time. What do i do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/pettyrevenge
TITLE: I'll just make a user use Linux
POST: So my roommate is probably one of the most inconsiderate, unsympathetic, jerkwards on the entire planet. He does typical horrible roommate stuff such as not doing dishes, moving all my stuff without asking, inviting girls over without asking/warning, etc. It's even worse since we're in dorms so I don't even have a room to retreat to. For the most part I just put up with it, but he went just a little too far and I decided I've had it.
So a little back story, about 2 weeks ago I got my wisdom teeth removed. I had to travel about an hour to my parents' place since my surgery was scheduled at the dental place by their house. No big deal. About a week after I had to go back down in order for my check up appointment. Once again, no big deal except when I came back he had crossed the line. So I have one of those foam mattress things on my bed to make my dorm bed a little more comfortable. When I got back, I saw my sheets had been ripped off my mattress and my foam mattress was gone. I looked at him and asked where it was and he proceeds to take it out from under his sheets and said his girl wasn't comfortable enough. Now I'm a pretty chill person but that crossed the line, however I'm not much for confrontation, so I plotted.
The revenge. So I have this old laptop I don't use much and made a dedicated "Netflix machine" for the two of us and he uses it pretty frequently but it's kinda slow so I told him I'd do some maintenance to it to speed it up. He was all for it. However little did he know that'd mean me installing a completely different operating system onto the machine (he's a pretty typical end user type of guy) and not putting any short cut to the internet browser for easy Netflix access. I put it back and now I'm just waiting for him to attempt to use it
TL;DR: | Roommate fucked with my bed so I changed the operating system on the computer to an operating system he'll never be able to figure out. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27 M] with my husband [29 M] of 2 years, and I don't know how to leave the relationship.
POST: Without getting into all the details, a recent series of events has confirmed to me that the relationship with my husband isn't going to work out. No one is really at fault. Our relationship moved too fast to be healthy; started dating to moving in together in 3 months, married in 8 months. We forced our lives together in such a short period of time. Immigration was a factor, as he is foreign and would be deported without me. Trying so hard to make things work and taking on massive financial challenges took it's toll on how I felt about him and the relationship and I no longer want to continue lying about it.
During our last fight I tried to take the opportunity to bring up the issue in a calm way. I let him know that I feel like we are trying to make things work and damaging ourselves in the process. I told him I didn't love him anymore and that we needed to discuss what we were going to do about our living situation and his immigration status. He immediately went into attack mode and tried accusing me of a lot of things that didn't make sense, but after he saw I wasn't relenting or taking it he changed his tune and became contrite and "wanted to make things work". I gave in because in reality, I don't know how my life would logically work without him right now.. I was recently laid off and haven't found employment yet, and I certainly can't afford to move out. His immigration file will likely be completed in the next few months too, essentially giving him permanent residency and I don't want to mess that up, especially given how much money we've spent on it, though one of the stipulations is that we have to be living together for at least 2 years in order for him to keep it..But I can't make it work with him. The resentment I feel for him due to recent events has just killed any chance of me feeling anything for him again. I don't want to be in this relationship, but I don't know the smartest way of leaving it without completely ripping apart both our lives.. What do I do..
TL;DR: | I want to leave my husband, but immigration and financial circumstances make it complicated and I don't know the best way to go about it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm (27f) trapped with his with my bf's (27m) friend (30ish m) who keeps using racial slurs.
POST: So I'm white and my boyfriend is black we've been together a little more than 1.5yrs. Most of his friends are black so I've gotten used to the frequent casual use of the n-word.
My parents always taught me no matter the circumstances you do not use racial slurs.
Obviously the rules on n***** have changed, the African american community really has reclaimed the word and made it their own. I don't think that makes it okay for white people to say it. Like: I as a woman can call my girl (as long as shes okay with it) my bitch but if her boyfriend does I'm gonna be pissed.
Here's the point though...this pasty ass motherfucker will not stop with the n-word. It's like every other word out of his mouth. I'm super annoyed and offended. My boyfriend doesn't seem to care though.
If my black boyfriend isn't offended this guy is using a racial slur, do I really have the right to be? And is it smart to bring it up to my boyfriend?
TL;DR: | I'm more offended by this guy using the n-word than my boyfriend who is black. Is that messed up of me? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [22F] have some trust issues with my boyfriend [21M] of 6 years, wondering what the protocol is on reading each other's texts.
POST: We've been together since our mid-teens, and have had our ups and downs. He has done some awful things during our time together, which included talking inappropriately to girls via text message and other social networks (read: sexting). We've always managed to work through them but I've never gotten over the heartbreak and have never managed to completely, fully regain trust.
So we were just hanging out tonight with my dog, and he forgot his phone at my place. I battled with it for a long time. We have had many talks about cheating, inappropriate behaviour, etc, and he has always, *always* insisted that he has cleaned up his act. Despite that, I couldn't stop myself from looking into his phone, and of course I found things that I didn't want to see.
One of the messages is him asking his buddy to "not mention the shot with that chick because I'm trying to patch things up with the gf" (this was around 2 weeks ago, I have no idea what he's referring to) and the other was him flirting with a girl, calling her delicious, cute, asking her to come drink with his buddies and save him a dance. This is a girl who I have explicitly brought up to him before because I got a feeling that there was something going on.
Neither of these things are serious enough to warrant a huge fight (at least not from what I could tell). They would have been even less serious if he was open with me about it from the beginning. But now I'm stuck in a rough spot - do I call him on the lies but admit that I broke into his phone? Or pretend I don't know what happened?
I don't want to be a hypocrite and lie to him. That wouldn't accomplish anything. I feel like I should be honest. Is it worth the shit storm it would bring up?
TL;DR: | Boyfriend has had some dishonest moments in the past, I can't quite trust him, and I read his texts. Found some things that I didn't like, but am not sure whether I should approach it with him. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20M] with two floor mates [20F?], feel like I'm being made into a joke but I don't know what to do
POST: Ever since the beginning of this year at college, two girls on my floor have been acting odd around me, smiling, giving each other looks and snickering when they saw me around the building. Today one of them got in the elevator with me, started smiling and texting.
When I got back to my room I could hear one of them a few rooms over saying "YOU RODE IN THE ELEVATOR WITH HIM?!" and both of them laughing pretty hard. I feel powerless in the situation, I think it is making my social anxiety worse but I'm not really sure how to deal with the issue in the best way.
I don't see any reason why they would see me as a joke, I have never even spoken to them...Regardless it hurts quite a bit to know you're the victim of someone else's joke. Sorry if this issue sounds minor in comparison to some of the other posts on the sub, I just need some advice.
TL;DR: | Girls on my floor are making me into a joke and it's making me feel awful. Not sure how to address the issue. |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Need suggestions on first personal credit card(s).
POST: Hello, so I am 23, just finished school and have a full time job now. It just hit me that its time to finally get some personal credit cards of my own. I was wondering if you guys could help me out. I have a good credit score since I was fortunate enough to have the paid off right out of school (long story) and my mom put me on some of her cards with all good payments. So, I have pretty good credit, no debt, and have a decent paying job. I also just recently applied for a Chase Freedom Card that I should be receiving in the mail shortly. What do you guys think I should be doing for my first credit card (or cards)? I want to build my credit and learn more about how everything works. Do you guys think that the Chase Freedom is a good card to get? Do you guys have a recommendation for another card to get as well? Or should i just stick with one card for now?
TL;DR: | I have good credit, no debt, about to get my first Chase Freedom Card. Should i stick with one card? Get another one? What's a good one to get as well? Just trying to build credit and learn. |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: Getting sent to collections
POST: First sorry about the formatting I'm on my phone, so please forgive my grammar.
I recently worked for a medical office in Massachusetts that has been doing some really shady things. I didn't agree with the owners terrible ethics so I resigned a few weeks ago. Today I went to lunch with my coworker (she still works there). After catching up she starts telling me that the owner sent a personal friend I know to collections today. She expressed her discomfort in having to deal with the situation because she feels it was wrong. Here is what she said happened.
Patient often times have insurance that does not cover the type of care the office provides. In these cases we offer payment plans that stretch the cost of treatment out over a year. The patient is given a contract listing all payments and due dates and has to set up automatic payment. This particular patient used a debit card for the automatic withdraws. So around December we sent it a notice letting her know the expiration date on the card was coming up. She contacted us and said she hadn't gotten a new card yet but would give us the new number in February when this card expired. The boss had a hissy fit and basically wanted intimation now. Even though the payments were getting made. So fast forward to this week. The patient calls in with the new card number Friday evening after the office closed. Her payment was due the following Monday. My friend asked the doctor what she should do and he said send her to collections. The patient called in that day tried to pay AGAIN on the day her payment was due. She was denied and sent to collections anyway.
This is not the first time he had done things like this. It doesn't even make good sense. Even if she pays the collection agency he now only will get 55%. Again it is the reason I resigned. So I really want to try and help this former patient.
Does anyone know if this is even legal?
TL;DR: | My old boss sent someone I know to collections even though she called in to pay her payment on the bill due date. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17 M] with my best friend [17 F] 7 years, might have feelings for her
POST: So I used to have a huge crush on this girl in school. Long story short she wasn't interested in me so I hung around as a friend. 7 years later we're best friends and basically extremely close to each other. She thinks of me as a friend/brother/gay best friend and I think of her as a best friend.
Thing is, she sends me pics of boys and tells me about how much she loves this guy or that guy and me being me, I just listen to it. Not long after she is most likely going to have a boyfriend. I feel like someone stabs me each time she talks about boys, mainly because those are the boys she picked over me. Even though I want to be best friends with her it hurts me to stay friends.
I can't get away from her, or break the friendship because we really love each other in a platonic way and she has helped me through so much, I don't want to be selfish and just leave her. Both of us are depressed and each other's company is what keeps us going. If I stop talking to her I will feel empty because there is no one in my life like her, or even has the potential to be as close to me as she is.
TL;DR: | Have a girl best friend. Might still have feelings for her. Talking to her hurts me, not talking to her hurts me. What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Am I [22F] manipulating my parents?
POST: I have severe social anxiety, so I've been living with my parents while I'm studying. They're not happy about it. Here's why:
* I've recently failed several papers. They put this down to laziness. I put it down to anxiety, but maybe it's the same thing.
* I have been seeing a therapist for 3 years and "nothing has changed". I think I've made improvements, and so does my therapist, but my parents disagree. They compare me to other people my age who have jobs, social lives, and have finished their studies, and tell me I'm a disappointment and a wasted life. When I agree, they tell me to stop being a victim.
* I am not currently taking medication for my anxiety and depression, which they say is selfish. I did try medication for two years, but it left me with sexual dysfunction (that I can't tell them about, obviously) and disordered eating (because I was so concerned about gaining weight on the medication, another thing that I can't tell them about), and there is no medication available that does not carry the risk of one of those side effects.
From their perspective, my mental illness is a ploy to make myself look like a victim so that I can manipulate them into letting me live in their house. From my perspective, I am sick of my mental illness and I hate seeing the stress that it causes them, but I have no other options. I have no friends, no way to find a job, and I can't talk to people outside of my immediate family. If I could find a way out, I wouldn't be living here.
So, what do outsiders think? I guess I'm looking for people to judge me, because something needs to change. Not sure how to get out of this situation.
TL;DR: | I'm living with my parents because I have anxiety and they resent me for leeching off them. Not sure what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: [question] buying new clothes.
POST: Hi. I got engaged to my girlfriend this summer and we are getting married next year. Some both of us are overweight and want to lose it. We made a deal to get down to our as close as we can to our goal weight. Mine being 80 kg and he's being 47. It has gone well so far and I have gone from 125 to 111kg.
Now this week I noticed that my pants that I wear are getting a bit lose. So i have to pull them up all the time. I have a belt that I can use to keep them up but I started to think of how I should do in the future. So my question is. Is it better to buy clothes like pants and shorts while I drop in weight? Or should I wait until I reach my goal weight?
TL;DR: | is it better to buy new clothes as you lose weight? Or should I wait until I get to where I want to be? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I am [23 M] who has been interested in [23 F] for the last few months but she has a boyfriend.
POST: I just started graduate school in Europe and I am from the States. I met this girl a few days into moving into my new dorm. She lives on the same floor.
First time I met her, I immediately began falling for her. The more we talked, the more I realized she was the girl I've been looking for. A few days later I found out she has a boyfriend back in the States for the last 5 years. As time went on she started coming over and we cuddle and talk about our lives, families, goals, etc.
Just as I felt like we were clicking, she threw the brother tag on me. But as a month or so went by, she started deflecting when I'd jokingly call her my sister. The cuddling and closeness has gone on for about 2-3 months now and this past weekend I was drunk and she was sober but she came over anyways and we were cuddling to a point where it was not ok.
We were wrapped around each other and fell asleep holding hands. But my biggest problem is that she never wants to hang out. She'll come when she wants to come but never when I ask.
I understand school is extremely challenging and our professional aspiration is not the easiest to attain. I guess I'm just lost. Does she like me? Does she not? Am I just a filler for her boyfriend? Would love to hear your thoughts. I just know that when I'm with her I forget time. But I don't want to be in a position where I fall this hard for someone who has no intentions of reciprocating.
TL;DR: | Went to school, found a girl. Girl has boyfriend. We spend time together but can't tell if this is something more on her side or she is just using me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23F] with my new neighbors who are abusing their children.
POST: I moved here a month ago, it's a small apartment, so I can hear what other people do better. From what I gathered, I think there's a mother, father, grandmother and grandfather, and the two girls. Anyway, the girls are no longer toddlers, so it makes no sense that I hear them crying every fucking day. Usually I don't know the context but I heard the mother/grandmother beating one of them twice. I'm honestly afraid for them. I also hear the girls laughing a lot like happy kids do but still.
If my country was serious about child abuse I would've called someone ages ago. But it isn't, and it saddens me that there's little I could do, I think my only option would be to confront them and tell them that they're not raising their kids properly. What if they're seriously abusing them, like inflicting torture or something? I have no idea what I have to do.
To be honest, if there was a hypothetical bad case of abuse, and someone called the police, the kids might be taken into an orphanage, and the orphanages here are worse, they are sketchy as hell. I don't want to state where I live, but bear in mind there are many homeless children out here, a lot of corruption, the police doesn't do shit, and that won't change for a long time.
There was another episode a few hours ago, and all I wanted to do was shout "Leave that poor kid alone you fucking animal!"
TL;DR: | My neigbours are abusive to their kids and I have no options. Should I talk to them, threaten to call the police? |
SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: SV Below 290 For the First Time in 5 Years! (M/28/6'2")
POST: I started at 303 3 and a half weeks ago, my weigh-in today was at 289! My next goal is to get back into the weight-class I wrestled at in high-school (215-275). My eventual goal is an even 200. Thank you r/loseit, you guys are an unending inspiration! Good luck to everyone!
TL;DR: | Eating less, moving a whole HELL of a lot more, drinking a lot of water, no sodas, less beer, getting out and doing stuff on the weekend. All of this has led to a lighter, more energetic me! |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, How would you go about putting 45-50 minute audio recordings on to the Internet weekly?
POST: So here's the full situation, I run the sound booth at a church, and they've decided that they want the sermons recorded (usually clock in around 45-50 minutes) and distributed, My problem becomes delivering the media. 70% of the church members are elderly, most not very good at computers (they'll get a CD version if they can't even turn on a computer), so I'm looking for a solution that's user-friendly. I was considering just posting the audio to Youtube, but remembered that you're limited to 10 minute videos on non-sponsor accounts. Stream-able would be the best approach in my opinion, but I'm not sure how to go about it, which is why I'm asking Reddit.
TL;DR: | I need to upload 45-50 min. audio files, what do you think is the most user friendly way to deliver them? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Is he genuinely 'busy' or is something else going on?
POST: Hi reddit. This one will take a little bit of background (first post on /r/relationships but I'll do my best).
I met this guy just over a month ago. I'm female, 17 and he's male, French, 27. The age gap came as a surprise to both of us, as he though me older and I thought him younger. We're both okay with it.
He approached me out of the blue in a coffee shop at the mall where I was before work and asked to sit with me. He started asking lots of questions and was very friendly and approachable. I agreed to meet him after my shift for another coffee, he was easy to get on with and seemed interested.
Since that point we met for coffee a lot and even went out in the evening a couple of times together. He's been texting me, everything seemed positive but then he got very busy with work.
While I've made an effort to make other plans, he continues to be very busy and I've only seen him once in the past few weeks. He tells me that he does really want to spend time with me; at one point I did ask him if I had the wrong idea about the two of us and he insisted he was just busy, not that he'd lost interest. Still, he won't make solid plans with me.
I guess what I'm asking is whether you guys think it's worth putting effort into. I feel that even if he *was* just looking for sex (16 is the age of consent where I live), that he'd be making some more effort. I've been trying to make plans, and I'm genuinely interested in this guy. And from everything he's said, he still fancies me!
Is there anything I can do to make it work, or should I just leave it for him to chase me for a while? Should I do anything differently? Help!
TL;DR: | 10 year age gap, we're both really into each other, but he's keeps saying he's busy and won't make plans with me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 M] with my GF [26 F] of 1 month, Invited me to Christmas w/the fam, I'm not comfortable inviting her
POST: So my gf invited me to Christmas dinner literally the week we started "officially dating," which I'm not gonna lie made me very uncomfortable but apparently her fam expects the bf to go so, not wanting to insult anyone, I said yes. Problem is, I am in NO WAY comfortable inviting someone I've only been dating for a month to Christmas with my family. I get it, her family likes to include s/os regardless of dating duration but in my family bringing someone to Christmas is kind of a big deal.
I tried explaining this to her and to begin with she was a little upset (this was almost a month ago btw) but said she understood. Well now that Christmas is in a few days she brought it back up again and says she doesn't understand why "I don't want to spend Christmas with her" and that she feels unwanted. I tried re-explaining that in my family we just don't bring people we've been dating for a month or so and that bringing someone is usually a precursor to a certain circular shiny object with a diamond attached, but she still continues to think it's just me not wanting to see her. Am I in the wrong for not wanting to bring her yet? Is there anything I can do/say to show her that she's not unwanted, this is just how my family is about Christmas?
TL;DR: | GF of 1 month invited me to Christmas days after we were official. I said yes, but don't feel comfortable bringing her to mine and shes upset. Thoughts? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Idk what to do
POST: I've been with this girl I'm madly in love with for about a year. I'm 22m she's 21f. She's moving into a new on campus apartment and will have a new roommate who is single, and will want to go out and meet guys all the time. The last year I had my own place and my girl stayed with me every day, every night. We've spent countless hours together. We planned on me moving in with her because my lease ended at my place and she's going from a studio to a 2 bedroom. The plan was since it's two bedrooms I would stay with her. But I have a pitbull and there's a $200 a month pet bill. Basically my only options are to get rid of my 2 year old sweet dog that I've had since 4 months, and live with my gf. Or stay at my moms and only see my gf once or twice a week. I find 2 problems with that; 1 I have needs. Not being able to see her more than a couple times a week is going to really hurt and make me possibly want to cheat. And it will worry me that she will cheat on me because her roommate is single and wants to have girls nights out. I'm scared she'll get drunk and accidently fuck some guy. I don't want to keep texting her where are you and shit like some crazy fucker. The reason I would only be able to see her a couple times a week max is because her school is 35 minutes from my parents house. Which I haven't lived at for almost 5 years. It's all so fucked and I don't know if I should break up with her or what. I have huge trust issues. This is the first girl I've ever trusted very deeply. But this living situation, choosing between my dog and her is really hard. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm so lost and depressed. I need outside perspectives. Please help.
TL;DR: | I have to choose between living with my girlfriend who I love deeply and getting rid of my dog or only seeing my gf once or twice a week. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: BF (30M) monitors my (24F) search history
POST: Hey I'm new to Reddit and would like to ask the community for some advice.
I've been dating my boyfriend for six months and we've been friends for two years, we are very close and passionate for each other.
He's a software engineer and incredibly smart, he takes care of me, he's loyal and sweet, he cooks for me and buys me things all the time.
The only problem is that he closely monitors my search history, IMs, Facebook, phone logs etc. and whenever he sees something strange we have an argument about it. Sometimes he'd see a number on my phone record that he doesn't recognise and I would get in trouble for it, then I'd have to explain that it's just my boss, or a family member. e lets time pass by after he sees something he doesn't like, then the whole thing just explodes into an argument.
I don't have anything to hide but I do occasionally watch porn and he gets incredibly mad about it and considers it as cheating. I've tried explaining to him that it doesn't substitute him it's just something I do to relieve stress.. weird but it works for me.
On Facebook I've deleted my exs' profiles and I rarely use it any more, but recently for some reason I clicked on my ex's profile because he was tagged in a post of a friend, and when my bf saw that I went on this profile he flipped out. I don't feel anything for my ex, honestly I'm not sure why I clicked his profile, I think it was just simple curiosity, but it doesn't mean anything.
A few months ago my bf tried installing a keylogger on my PC and I confronted him about it and told him its an invasion of privacy. I also used to share memes or YouTube links on Facebook and would get likes from my male friends - it would also upset him.
I'm really not sure what to do about this situation any more, I love him very much and I just want him to stop making a big deal out of everything, I wish he'd trust me but I don't know what I can do to convince him I'm trustworthy.
I'd really appreciate your opinions on this :)
TL;DR: | BF (30M) frequently monitors my (24F) search history - gets upset if he finds porn links or that I've visited an ex's profile. Don't know how to confront him. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by going to sleep too early
POST: Actually this happened nearly a year ago while I was camping with a friend of mine. Btw I am a 20 year old male and English is not my native language.
After coming back from a canoe trip we decided to grill some steaks and drink some beers. In the middle of the we decided to go to sleep, so we put our campfire out and took the beer into one of our tents.
We went in our separated tents and I slept directly.
Suddenly I wake up in the middle of the night with an urgent need to poop. And I mean fucking urgent. I put on my trousers, go out of the tent and put on my shoes. And when I bend down to tie them I feel it. The warmth of my own poop. In my trousers. In the middle of the night.
I head to the bathrooms (about 1km) to see what I've done. On the way comes more and more out of me. It's even in my shoes! After cleaning myself down there with Toiletpaper I put TP into my underwear and head back to my tent to get some towels to shower. After coming back to the bathrooms I go into a shower just to realize that you need change to pay for warm water. So I rush back to my tent, smelling like I shat myself to see, that I have no change left. I go back to the bathroom, shower ice cold and try to wash my clothes, which didn't work so I had to leave them smelly and wash them 2 days later at home.
TL;DR: | Was canoeing and camping, drank some beer and ate some steaks, went to sleep, shat myself, had to shower ice cold. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Parenting
TITLE: Mom starved children
POST: My wife is a nurse and works typically three to four 12 hour shifts a week, though she goes in at 5:30am and sometimes doesn't get home until after 7pm. My children (daughter 3yrs, and son 11mo) usually wake up early, but there are times when they don't wake up early enough to spend time with their mom. Even if they are up early enough, the time they get to spend with my wife is not quality time as she is frantically getting everything ready to leave on time. Sometimes at night, the 11 month old will be asleep by the time my wife gets home. Long story short, the kids don't get to see their mom on the regular like they see me.
The decreased time spent with their mom has created some separation issues for my children. And in particular, my daughter. While at day care or at home with me, she is absolutely fine. But when my wife decides to take the kids for the day instead of taking them to daycare, it becomes a train wreck. Melt down after meltdown; constant attention seeking; creating failures out of nothing to get sympathy attention. It has become very draining for my wife. She is getting to the point of wanting to not keep them home on select days despite the fact that she misses them greatly.
Her shifts are constantly changing, so there is no regularity to when they are seeing them. One thought I've had is that they are used to getting a trickle of attention from mom. Then all of a sudden, without warning, full torrential attention. They both fight over her attention.
We are at loss of what to do.
TL;DR: | Wife is a nurse, is gone a lot. Kids go nuts for her attention to the point of it creating a stressful home situation. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [M22] am hoping to live with a good friend [F20] next year at college. Any way to help convince her father [M50s] it's okay?
POST: Like the title said, I'm hoping to get an apartment with a friend of mine. She currently has a boyfriend (who as far as I know is fine with it), and I'm currently single. There's absolutely nothing romantic between us at all. She and I know each other through the campus theatre group. She is currently planning on living on campus with other girls, and I mentioned we should look at getting a two bedroom apartment since it's cheaper and allows for more indepedence. She agreed, and talked to her mom about it, who was fine. They're both worried that her dad will say no, since I'm a guy and she's a girl. He's extremely protective, especially because he's a cop, and typically sees the worst case scenario in any situation. Her mom is going to talk to her dad about it tomorrow, and I'm wondering if there's anything worth mentioning that might help soften the blow. It's necessary that we have his approval, since they help pay for her school. I've mentioned that I'd be more than willing to talk to him and address any concerns he may have. The place we'd likely be getting is just off campus, and isn't any less safe than living on campus would be.
TL;DR: | A friend and I want to live together, but her dad will probably say no. Anything I can do to help convince him? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My girlfriend [21 F] of 9 months gets angry at me (22 M) for things I did before we ever met.
POST: My girlfriend and I both attend Syracuse, and we're out on summer vacation. As soon as we left for summer, she started getting angry at me almost daily. Mostly little things that were resolved in a minute or two, but occasionally these turn into full-blown arguments that last for an hour.
Most of these revolve around my previous relationship that ended almost a year before we ever started dating. I try to maintain good relations with everyone, and she is no different. Most of our contact revolves around the occasional facebook comment or a picture "like", but we are both in relationships now and none of it is flirty or anything like that.
It got to the point where I was yelled at for being tagged in a picture that was almost 2 years old (of which I had no control). I'm almost afraid to talk to my female friends that I've known for years without having to play 20 questions about who the person is. The occasional phonecall from a girl inviting us to go out with a group of friends usually ends up in a fight fairly quickly.
My girlfriend is a great person, don't get me wrong. We get along great and have a lot of things in common. I have never, nor will I ever cheat on her, but the jealousy is so intense that sometimes I have no idea what to do. I don't want the relationship to end because of something as silly as this.
TL;DR: | Girlfriend is jealous of ex and female friends, gets angry about things I did before we ever met. What to do about it in a way that keeps the relationship intact (if possible)? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I [F20] don't know how to deal with busy boyfriend [M22]
POST: We've been going out for just a little over a year now. We are both in school, but his work load is just more intensive than mine. I respect his need to take time to do assignments/study, so when he is bogged down with school then we cancel our plans to hang out. I totally understand this! Usually it's me who cancels our plans because I don't want to cause his grades to go down if he doesn't finish papers/study since he was spending time with me. Since that'd totally just make me feel guilty.
But I am not entirely sure if I'm okay with having our plans put on the back burner as often as it happens. A lot of the times when we cancel plans, it's because he procrastinated on assignments from playing video games or from derping around on the internet - even when he knows we made plans at the end of the week and that he should get his work done. I feel like he just doesn't make time to spend with me.
This isn't to say that I am not busy either. It's just that I get all the things I need to get done so that I have time to go out with him or hang out with friends or whatever.
I get all excited and giddy at the thought of spending time with him when we make plans, so when they get cancelled it's really disappointing and a bummer. We usually hang out once a week, and sometimes even just once every 2 weeks.
He is such a sweet and funny person otherwise. And I really do love him. I just wonder if there's any advice on how to be in a relationship with someone who is busier than you are, or if there's any way to have him make time for me or maybe I am just screwed. Who knows. ): I am afraid of bringing this up with him in case I come off as clingy, or end up just being another nuisance to add to his worries and work pile.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend is really busy, I don't feel like he makes time for me since we cancel our plans often, how do I deal with this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: It's just the beginning! (could use encouragement)
POST: I was originally going to title this as "getting a little discouraged" before I decided to take a new spin on things.
A little background: I'm 27f, 5'3'' and 207.5 lbs as of this morning. I'd like to be around 130-140 lbs. I rededicated myself to losing weight 2 weeks ago. I just got tired of making excuses for myself. So I joined myfitness pal, got a fitbit, and I've been taking ballroom classes (3x/week) for almost a month now. When I started using MFP, I realized I had only been eating around 650-800 calories a day. Yikes! The first week, I lost 5 lbs. I felt great. This week, not only have I gone to dance class 3 times, but I've worked out 2 other days. Despite working out 5 times this week, I've still gained half a pound. It's a little discouraging to do such good work to see nothing for it. I changed my settings from lightly active to sedentary, considering I'm back in school.
TL;DR: | I worked hard this week and ended up gaining. My brain knows that I won't lose every week but my subconscious is still disappointed. |
SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: With a computer games programming degree, struggling to break into the IT industry
POST: I feel like I'm stuck in a rut at the moment and don't really see a way out.
I graduated back in 2014 as a Computer Games Programmer, being based in the UK I quickly figured out how hard it would be to get a job in this Industry. After about 10 months of solid applying I had not one single interview, with the advice from careers advisers and IT recruiters I decided to shelf the games Industry and look towards a career in IT. Along with my 2:1 University degree I also had a college degree in Computing, a Microsoft degree in desktop support and also with a certificate in ECDL (essentially a degree in all the Microsoft packages) I started applying for admin, data input and technical support jobs.
From the start of 2015 till now I have only received one interview. I have been to so many recruiters and careers specialists with my CV and cover letters, tweaked them several times over and they all said the same thing to me "The fact you have a university degree should greatly improve your chances in getting a job" but now I feel like this isn't the case. I feel like I'm stuck between two kind of jobs, the jobs like admin support, data input, office junior, I get almost instantly rejected because I'm over qualified for these starter positions, and then we get the other jobs that pay a little more and ask a little more from the candidate that also reject me, stating I have no actual IT experience for the position.
No matter how I word my CV's and Cover Letters they all think I don't care about their job and I'll leave as soon as I get the chance, while that may be the case for a lot of people, it isn't for me. I intend to work in an IT position and work my way up in this Industry.
Is there anything I could do to benefit me getting a starter IT position? I've been told going back to college could be an option, but realistically is getting **another** degree in Computing suddenly going to make people interested?
TL;DR: | Computer Games Graduate can't get an IT position anywhere, either too qualified or no experience, would really appreciate some advice from anyone who has been in a similar situation |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My girlfriend is still active on OKCupid. [m25][f26] How do I define a boundary for things like this?
POST: We have been dating for just a month now. We met through mutual friends, but we both have OKcupid accounts. I haven't been logging in and messaging others since we started dating.
She told me she found my profile about a week ago. I logged in and found her in my visitors list and I noticed that she logged in earlier in the morning. I checked back later and she logged in again in the evening. She is still listed as single. After I saw this, I changed my status to seeing someone.
It bothers me to think she is seeking dates from other guys. I have heard of girls keeping their accounts active as a way to get attention and keep their ego up, but what are these guys doing that I cant?
I plan on telling her that I changed my status and that I don't feel comfortable with her advertising herself as single on a dating site. I am looking for advice on the best way to handle this conversation. Thanks!
TL;DR: | Gurrl, why are you still active on OKC? I am too good to you to be an "in-betweener" |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: 'The Internet'
POST: **Perhaps this wasn't the most relevant title either**
This will be my first personal post to /r/self and I'm not sure what is permitted here. I wanted to ********** tonight and I also wanted to post somewhere that I intended to do so. I have several different accounts on different websites that I could inform 'the internet' (as if 'the internet' is a higher being that has a collective consciousness) of my plan, however, there are people that know me in real life that can view my posts.
An issue with this is: The effects of your actions aren't as long lasting if whatever you may do... is on the internet. But, if your 'physical' surrounding is affected you become paranoid (at least I have). Everybody I know understands what I mean when I say you can do what you wish when no one you know (or care about) is around. Everyone I know feels more comfortable to do what they want when there isn't an attachment made. Of course!
I was thinking about how I want to post about what I'M DOING, and I want to post it badly. But I'm so afraid of having my immediate surrounding (the fellows who know me outside of 'the internet') negative. When I was littler I knew the internet wasn't a foreign land where nothing could affect me. I knew that the internet was very responsive... I think would be the word. What I do will have response. I'm afraid of being seen as an idiot by everyone here. And I usually have a rather high respect for redditors because they typically have very well-structured ideas and facts.
But, I feel now, even if I am an idiot on the internet, at least people can tell me and I'll have an understanding with how I can improve, whose values I value, and learn more from direct interaction with more internet gentlemen and ladies.
TL;DR: | I've decided to try breaking out of my internet shell and start posting things no matter if I'll look like an idiot |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by taking a shot of Fire Cider.
POST: This actually happened today, though I really wish it didn't.
To start the story off, I was hanging out at my boyfriend's house and we were eating pizza while watching some videos on youtube. His mom called from the kitchen telling me to come there, with uncontrollable laughter.
Being curious, I decide to go figure out what's going on. When I get there my boyfriend's brother, mom, and sister are laughing and snickering. "Come on, drink this and I'll give you $5!" She usually makes a lot of smoothie concoctions, I figured this was one of those. At worst it'd be a bunch of fruit and veggies with soy milk. Thinking this was an easy five, I took the glass and downed it.
This is where I fuck up. Thinking it'd go down no problem, I begin to gag and can't swallow. They're edging me on so I hold my nose and force it down... And then it burns to the point where I can barely breathe. It feels like my throat is closing up and I leap toward the sink to get some water, only when the water goes in everything comes out. Not only did I puke up the drink, along with it came the pizza I was craving all day and finally had only half an hour ago.
Turns out that the drink was something called "Fire Cider" which is supposed to relieve joint pain and do some other things. It contains raw apple cider vinegar, honey, oranges, lemons, onions, ginger, horseradish, habanero pepper, garlic and turmeric. I'm not a person who enjoys spicy things so of course it didn't go down well.
His mom felt bad for me and ended up giving me $10 instead, but she recorded all of this but deleted it after she saw how miserable I was and they all got quite the laugh out of it. I sat bent over the sink for a good ten minutes before I felt like I could walk all the way back to the SO's room and sink into his bed and cry.
TL;DR: | Was dared to down mystery drink, puked it up and still can't feel my throat after 6 hours. (Was also laughed at quite a bit :c) |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27 M] with my wife [24 F] need serious advise.
POST: Hello redditors!
My wife and I have been together for 8 and 1/2 years and She is 5 months pregnant. We work jobs that require us to drive 120 miles a day. Thankfully we commute together. The issue is on the weekends she has recently wanted to go out every weekend. Not just outside to our koi pond, or play with the dogs. As in shop, and drive around all weekend and do/accomplish nothing... Commuting sucks, and driving in a car 120 miles a day+... I have started to tell her no. We're not going anywhere.
Don't get me wrong I don't mind going out, just not every weekend... and when I tell her I don't want to... she makes me feel so crappy that I don't want to do anything, and I put on an act to make keep her happy... but it's starting yo run me dry.
Am I wrong to put my foot down once in a while? When the baby comes yeah... different story.
TL;DR: | Am i wrong in wanting to stay home every couple weekends when we sit in a car 4 hours a day (weekdays)? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (22 M) wants more than friends, she (25 f) doesn't know what she wants.
POST: A little background, we have been friends for a while and I have always had something for her. Recently we started getting closer and closer and finally we hooked up. She doesn't regret it and we have hung out a lot since then. That is where things get weird.
We hang out all the time and till way late in the night, we talk all the time, we kiss and we act like a couple but only when it is just us. She always tells me she doesnt wanna hurt me and that i shouldnt get attached but it's too late and I told her that. She doesn't know where to go from there mostly cause i would be her first non ldr and we share a lot of the same friends so she doesnt want things to get weird. Should i be worried or should i just try to go with the flow and hope things work out?
TL;DR: | Friends who hooked up and now i want more but she isnt sure yet due to inexperience with relationships and because she doesnt want to ruin our group of friends. What should i do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22 M] with my ex [19 F] of 10 months, I'm completely over her a month later, is it alright to send her a happy birthday message?
POST: Ex gf of 10 months dumped me about 5 weeks ago and I took it hard. She was my first everything and it was so unexpected to me, as I cared about her very much. In retrospect she didn't treat me very well, and to be fair, I had grown complacent with my life.
I spent about 3 weeks miserable. I coped by getting in shape and getting my life together. Now, 5 weeks post-breakup, my life is finally on track, I'm 15 lbs lighter, and in general I'm a better person. I've also met an awesome girl. Our first date lasted an entire day and we had an amazing connection. I had basically been over my ex before meeting this girl, but after sleeping with new girl 4-5 times on the first date, I had a revelation and no longer hold any resentment or ill will towards my ex, even after the way she treated me. I have zero desire to get back with my ex and wouldn't even if she begged me to. But I don't like holding grudges against people.
The breakup was not friendly, and I angrily told my ex to "not to talk to me for awhile" the day after we broke up. We haven't spoken since. She probably thinks that I hate her, which bothers me, as she was once very important to me. For my birthday a few months ago, my ex spent a considerable amount of money for a very meaningful gift. I would feel bad if I couldn't even return a simple birthday wish.
I no longer have her number but am friends with her on facebook. Is it alright to send her a short, "Hey happy birthday, I hope you are doing well" message?
TL;DR: | ok to break no contact and give a short "Happy birthday" if you're over your ex, she dumped you, and you have no desire to get back together? |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: How can I (27F) learn to decline/ say no?
POST: I haven't really learned to say no when I grew up. I come from a family with a physically abusive father and as a child I was not allowed to answer back, disagree or say no to him without fearing to get beaten.
I've seen a therapist for 4 years, attended self defense and martial arts classes and I feel a lot more confident than some years ago, however I still struggle to say no, especially to men who are older than me and are close to the age of my father.
There is this older guy "Peter" (about 60) in my swim club who used to be my swimming instructor. He is always telling me he wants to help me in becoming a better swimmer, he already offered to train with me after my training is over, to go on a lake together to practice free water swimming or to drive me to a swim meet.
I feel unconformatable in Peter's presence as he's always staring at my body when he's talking to me (and I only wear a swimsuit) and I've said to him several times that I'm not interested or have other people who I train with. I feel like he may be sexually interested in me (and I'm totally not in him), I wouldn't want to spend any time alone with him.
Peter stopped asking me for some months, but two days ago, he was there again and offered to help me again. What can I do to make him stop talking to me?
(I'm not a native speaker of English, so my wording is probably a bit awkward.)
TL;DR: | I have a problem declining my former swimming instructor's offers to help me/ meet me privately. Please give me some advice on how to say no. |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Can anyone suggest a REVERSE budgeting tool/income requirement calculator?
POST: I checked the wiki, but didn't really find what I was looking for.
I'm hoping to find a tool that will allow me to enter my budget, including fixed and estimated variable expenses. To put that another way, *the amount of money I expect to pay out each month*.
Then, given that information, tell me how much gross income (before taxes) that I would need to make in order to support that budget.
I've found some tools for categorizing my expenses and figuring out how much I *am* spending each month, and I've found some tools that let me enter a salary amount and withholding amounts to figure out how much of it I'd get to take home. But I haven't found anything that will let me plug in a number (the amount of *net income* I need), and return the amount I would need to be paid in order to sustain it.
I'm not making enough to cover my bills right now, so I'm looking for a higher paying job, but I would really benefit from an approximate number that I can work with as far as what my minimum salary requirement actually is.
TL;DR: | I need to take a minimum net income and figure out how much money I need to be making in order to support it |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22F] with my friend [25F], is it rude to not attend her Christening?
POST: So I've been friends with this girl for over 15 years now and we basically grew up together. Recently she got engaged and wants to get married and have a ceremony in the church, which requires her to take religious classes/ attend mass/ etc. Prior to this, she was not religious at all and only went to church on major holidays due to her parents' wishes.
So on to the problem: Today, she invited me to her Christening and the party afterwards, which will be occurring this upcoming Saturday. I told her I probably wouldn't make it because I wanted to spend that day with my boyfriend (who lives an hour away/ I see 1x/week) and we were also planning on seeing an opera that night. While I probably COULD make it, there will be traffic getting to my boyfriend the later I leave my place. Also, I didn't feel that my attendance would have been that important to her since she's doing it to get married, not for any personal religious reasons. However, she seemed slightly annoyed when I said I probably wouldn't go.
My question is, Was it rude of me to decline? Should I have sucked it up and said I'd go? While I may or may not change my decision based on the answers I get, I do want to know what proper etiquette is for future reference. Thanks in advance for any help you can give me!
TL;DR: | My friend invited me to her Christening and party, which I declined. Was I in the wrong to decline? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [28F] I have a long term relationship with [27M], but I think I am falling hard for one of my teachers.
POST: We have been together for 2 years and living together for the last year. It's a good relationship, he loves me very much and is very kind. I have had passionate crazy relationships in the past so I thought he would be the "best" guy to settle with. Everyone (friends, family) think he is adorable and so good to me but I feel like something is missing.
I didn't realize how much I miss passion in my relationship until I met my french teacher (3 months ago). He instantly light up the room for me and I couldn't stop staring into his eyes. I have been obsessing over him ever since, think about him all the time, I see his face during sex with my boyfriend, I dream of him every other night, en so on...
I don't know how to handle all the feelings Im having. Worst part is after class is over I am going back to my hometown and probably never see him again. The only thing I do know for sure is he likes me too, I see it in his eyes and in the way he get's nervous when I around him but he might have a girlfriend or other issues.
I am kinda desperate and have no idea how to handle the situation, any advice?
Thanks in advance so much!
TL;DR: | I am in a good relationship, but I think I am falling in love with one of my teachers. What do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (21F) partner (26M) of about 6ish maybe more months keeps going through my phone
POST: So we've been together a while. Weren't serious at the start which is why I say 6ish months because we never laid out any rules at the start (which was in January this year) so it was all kind of casual at the beginning, now it's more serious than ever! We recently moved in together, we usually have a very good and stable relationship so everything is pretty much on point in nearly every aspect but lately I catch him searching through my phone.. I've never once given him reason to think there's something going on and I'd never cheat on him in any way. The only guys other than him that I speak to are his mates or life long friends of mine. I'm just confused like is this a trust thing only or is there a deeper reason that I might be missing here? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
TL;DR: | my boyfriend keeps going through my phone and I've never given him reason. Is there something I could do to help him trust me more? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Should I (16M) make a move on one of my best friends (16F) of two years? How can I do so without harming our current friendship?
POST: Basically two years ago I met a girl, but long story short, nothing really came of it. It also turned out that she already had a boyfriend I didn't know about at the time.
Anyways, after that we just became really good friends over the past 2 years but I have realised I have strong feelings for her and want to try to make a move on her again although it could damage our current friendship if I get turned down. So... Should I try it? How could I try without damaging the friendship we currently have if I'm turned down?
TL;DR: | Should I try to make a move on one of my best friends of 2 years? And how can I do so without damaging our friendship? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I need help on how to handle the problem I'm having with an insurance company.
POST: So here's what happened, on 7/27 my car was parked in the parking lot at my apartment building. That night the car next to mine caught on fire from what is believed to be electrical problems and later had a small explosion. During this incident my car sustained fire damage including a partially melted front bumper, blinker, cowl, tire damage and other smaller things. Both me and the other party contacted our insurance companies that night to report the incident. After waiting thirteen days and spending much time trying to contact the other insurance company unsuccessfully and not having a car to drive, on 8/8 an adjuster finally came and looked at my car. They came to an estimate of around $1650 in damages. I called the insurance company today (8/11), however, and they said they wouldn't be able to send a check yet because they were looking into whether or not they are actually liable for the situation and I may not receive any money from them at all.
On top of this here are a few other points:
* I have not been given funds for a rental car, even though the letter they sent me says I should have been.
* I only have liability on my car since I am a 21 year old driving a 1996 Mercury Mystique and it's all I can afford so it likely wouldn't cover any of the damages.
* I have had to borrow my girlfriends car to get to and from work or have her drop me off/pick me up for the past two weeks since I can't drive my car.
Is there anything I can do about this situation? Or am I just unlucky as shit?
TL;DR: | Car caught on fire next to mine causing $1650 in damages to my car and I may not get any money for it whatsoever. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How do I get my ex-girlfriend to change her email password so that I can move on?
POST: It's just too easy, but sometimes I can't help it. I always, always end up feeling like diarrhea shit afterward, but it's been a couple weeks since I have last done it. The urge to log into her email just grows over time at the thought that there's bound to be even more about me to read, and I think it's going to be most painful of all when there's nothing. It's been several months, and it's just this last thread that needs to be cut so that I can move on.
I don't want to just up and tell her I've been reading her email. This would stir up a reason for us to talk, and give her more opportunity to talk down on me. I know this is a shitty invasion of privacy, but I think I've suffered for this sin enough. I have no creative solutions at this point.
Also, if you could lay out in great detail why going back and reading her email is a horrible fucking idea, I don't know maybe it would help reading it in someone else's words. I don't want to, but I definitely have, and I definitely feel the impulse on a consistent basis.
TL;DR: | I need a way to tell the ex to change her password without telling her I've been reading her email. Also, fucking stop me please. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22F] with my husband [28M] of 2 years, he's upset I put a deposit down on a tattoo. He compares me to his ex and won't tell me why.
POST: I [22f] have been married to my husband [28M] for 2 years and we have been together for about 3 years in total. We are great, we run into arguments and fight but we always talk it out. Eventually the problem gets solved but we never disrespect the other.
I've always liked tattoos, they are a way to express yourself without the use of words and each of the tattoos I have mean a lot to me.
I have two tattoos, one on my inner wrist and the other on my shoulder. When I got those two he was upset but we talked and he was fine with it. In the end he said it was my body so it was my decision. And it's true it's my body so it's my decision, I'm saving up for the tattoo and it's going to be on me.
I met with a tattoo artist today about a tattoo I have been wanting to get for about a year now. I've been talking about meeting up with a artist for about a month now and today was the day.
I put a deposit down and I have my appointment in May to actually get it done. I came home and told him and he was upset and angry, which was the reaction I was expecting.
When I asked him why he said I do whatever I want to do because it's my body. His anger and upset is linked to his ex, I'm not clear on the details and he won't tell me the details.
I hate that he compares me to his ex, I hate that he won't talk to me and I hate that he feels like he gets a say in what I do with my body. Yes we are married but I'm still my own person and I own my body.
TL;DR: | I [22f] put a deposit down for my tattoo, but my husband [28M] is upset and angry and won't tell me why. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20 M] with my GF [20 F] 2yr , how to start flirting again/regular correspondence?
POST: Hi all,
I was basically just wanting some opinions on how one might start flirting again with my SO. At the start of the relationship and in the first year, whenever we were apart (long distance outside of term time) we would communicate all the time, always talking and flirting etc. Recently however I am lucky to get a reply once a day, and it feels like i am being a drag trying to spark up a conversation.
I would like to be chatty and flirt with my girlfriend but by the time i get a reply its hours have past. I feel like she doesnt consider me much when she is away during the holiday periods (uni students) as her friendships etc occupy a lot of her time. What might you suggest? Should i leave her to her own devices and let her talk to me on her own terms? I also dont know how to go about flirting without sounding like im trying to get something off her...
I have already brought it up in conversation my feelings, and we agreed to try consider the other persons situation more, but nothing much changes.
TL;DR: | Used to be very chatty over holiday seasons, now little communication. what can i do to get the ball rolling? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [22 M] girlfriend [24 F] of 7 years drunkenly cheated on me.
POST: We were drinking in the backyard with some friends, and then she decided to go out to a local bar with her best friend. The bar was empty, but they met some random people that said they were down to have a party at their house. Even though multiple people left for the house, only 4 showed up (my gf, her friend, and two guys).
The two ladies were wasted by this point, and her friend passed out. Leaving out the details, my gf ended up having sex with one of the guys. She swears to having said "no" to hooking up with him the entire night but that she eventually "gave in" to his advances. She emphasized that it wasn't rape, so I don't know what to think.
This isn't the first time she has gotten way too drunk and done stupid shit, but this is definitely the most serious offense. I don't want to break-up with her because we've been through so much together and I don't want to go have "revenge sex" to get even with her. So what should I do?
TL;DR: | GF got drunk and had sex with some guy. Anyone been in a similar situation? Any advice? What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, I have a nerve that is being compressed by a mess of scar tissue. It sucks, anyone know how to fix this?
POST: Two years ago I had much needed reconstructive surgery to rebuild the ligaments on the outside of my ankle. The took an accessory tendon from the same ankle to make a new ligament. I healed great, had some nerve issues (numb toes), but who cares about numb toes when you can surf again.
While the surgery has made my ankle strong as hell, the resulting scar tissue is compressing my superficial peroneal nerve. Numb toes has turned into fire leg, that keeps me awake at night and leaves me rocking and holding my leg. We tried numbing the nerve out, it worked for a few months but wore off. I am slowly getting my fire leg back, and I am terrified. The doctors at this point have no solution except pain medication. I'm 26, used to be athletic, and really can't be stoned out of my mind for the rest of my life (fun as it sounds).
TL;DR: | My superficial peroneal nerve is compressed, ouch. I tried numbing it out, wore off. Don't want to take pain medication as a solution. So... |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: My father [59M] has said that he will not be attending my [28M] wedding because of my decision to take my girlfriends [28F] last name when we get married!
POST: For the past year, me and my girlfriend have been engaged and this November we will be getting married. My father has really approved our relationship for the past five years we've been dating and really cared about us both. But, just last week, he has said that he would not be attending my wedding because of the decision to take my girlfriend's last name when I get married.
He has not taken this lightly and quite frankly, it's been terrible to be around him. He's been very toxic to me and even my girlfriend. He's been saying that she is controlling me and using me for her own needs. It is clear that she is the breadwinner in our relationship as she works at a very high-end business, while I work at a local hotel in the middle of the city we live in. But he was never bothered by that. But he's really bothered by this!
He got into an argument with my girlfriend and it was really embarrassing to watch! I jumped in and told him to stop and said to him that we have made this decision as a couple. But he refused to listen My girlfriend said that she does not want to see my father again! However, we did, but they are not on the best of terms now and it's really concerning for the whole family.
My mother fully supports our decision and thinks that it's a really nice thing to do. But my father is just concerned that my girlfriend is using me when she clearly not! It's really made me mad and I don't know what to do about it all! The wedding is still going, it's just that I want my father to understand our decision.
Any advice?
TL;DR: | My father has said that he will not be attending our wedding because I made the decision to take my girlfriend's last name. He and my girlfriend have been arguing about it and he thinks that she is taking control of me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (20F) failed 1st year medical school. I dont know what to do anymore.
POST: Ive wanted to study about the human body and become a physician for a long time. I took everything science and math available in high school. I thought my average was good.
I live in NA (north america) but it requires an undergrad degree before being able to study medicine so I wanted to study in UK where you can start straight out of high school.
The first time i applied for UK med school, this was in the last year of high school, my ukcat score was average and i wasnt prepared for the only one interview i was offered. So after high school, i studied first year undergrad science at a local university.
Midway through first year of university, i reapplied for uk med schools. My ukcat was better, my interview skills were better, i received more interviews and got accepted to a few med schools. I accepted one med schools offer, it was my preference too. This was during second semester, I started to not take my classes seriously since i didnt need them anymore. Or so i thought.
This is after my first year of medical school. Today, i get the results back for my first year of med school. I failed. I failed sem 1, i failed sem 2, i retook the exam in the summer and still failed. It didnt help that med school had only one big exam every semester and no homework, instead practice questions sometimes without answers, so i wasnt able to track my progress. But really its all my fault.
I dont know what i do now. I feel like my life is over. Overdramatic definitely but yea.
I dont know what in doing this year. If i go straight back to university or i should take some time off to work. If i can go back to my old university. What to even study now. If i can pass it.
And in the uk my parents bought me an apartment, its furnished and with my stuff. Im even holding my friends storage boxes.
What will my friends and parents think?
TL;DR: | Since high school, i worked to get to medical school and today i failed 1st year. I dont know what to do now. I know its not the end of the world but it feels like it is. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dogs
TITLE: Destructive chewing
POST: Beethoven, Marley.... meet [Lego] those two have nothing on him.
When you meet my 6 month old Border Collie/ Lab mix he seems well behaved. He knows a variety of tricks and walks on a leash relatively well for his age (although that was not easy). He spends 8 hours a day in the house without us but he gets daily LONG walks and gets to play outside and run for at least an hour a day.
We have been confining him to our deck until he was fully potty trained and now he is allowed in the living room/dining room area. When we are home he's not allowed in the kitchen and he does pretty well with that however since we've been letting him inside, he has started destroying things.
They're usually harmless things like a stack of napkins he decided would be tasty and today he decided to chew apart the wood handles on his toy box. I was greeted with wood chips everywhere and puke on the floor containing wood chips. He has eaten underwear, sandals, napkins, paper towels, firewood, and tears his toys all to pieces.
Problem is he NEVER does that when we're home. He won't go anywhere near those things. So if he only does it when I'm not home, how am I supposed to change this behavior? I've tried hiding and waiting for him to go back for the thing he was chewing on when I got home and telling him no. Then I reinforced good behavior by treating him when he chose his moose antler or pork bone.
He has dozens of toys to chew on, pork bones, and a moose antler (which he LOVES). He's not teething anymore, he has all of his big boy teeth. He's getting fixed in 2 weeks which I'm not sure if that has much to do with this...
Any advice on how I can get him to stop destroying things when I'm not home?
TL;DR: | My puppy won't stop chewing but only does it when we're not home. He's given lots of other things to chew on and is exercised daily. How do I get him to stop? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My[22M] girlfriend[20F] of 14 months is boring in bed and I want more.
POST: I[22] started having sex at 15 and have enjoyed exploring my sexuality since then, this is my first real relationship. I met her[20] at college and fell for her right away. She was brilliant, funny and we had so much in common except when it came to sex because she was a virgin.
..at first, I was very happy, one thing a lot of guys like is innocence in the sex department and the idea that no other man has been with her, I know it's weird but those things went through my mind. I thought it would be hot teaching her the robes and all that and it was!
for a while but there needs to be interest in learning.
We didn't have sex for almost the first 5 months which was fine, porn got me through the sexual part of it and she was more than enough to satisfy the emotional side of a relationship because she is an awesome person.
We had sex and it was excellent, she was a bit timid but I made sure she felt comfortable and it was good for two months.
...in the beginning it was great, she is so hot and the connection we had is spiritual but after a while of the same position(guess which) it got a bit boring, I mean I was cumming but it wasn't getting anymore exciting and she had always said no when I tried to change into different positions. She likes eye contact and it is great but a guy needs some variety.
I asked her when we were not in bed weather we could do some other stuff like doggy style, 69 and even that was too much for her and she feels it's too impersonal, we've had a few minor fights over it.
...a nice body and a certain kind of sex can only keep the interest of a guy for so long. I need more but I don't feel like it's going to happen. I love her and I think she is the greatest person I have ever met but our incompatibility in the bedroom is killing us.
How do I talk to her about this in a constructive manner?
TL;DR: | My gf wont do any of the stuff I want to do in bed, and it's getting to the point were I'm ignoring her good parts and am ready to leave. |
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