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SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How can we constructively and constitutionally get rid of the two party system in U.S. politics?
POST: If you aren't upset with the way the two party system in the U.S. works then your doing something wrong. Imagine a country where there are no political parties, and candidates are chosen by the collective because they will do what is best for the country as a whole. They don't have to conform to party lines and big time donors. They just simply do what is right. The extremists and the guys with the cash have the voice in the party, not the collective. This is not how the system is supposed to work. With no parties, any candidate can run and people can choose who they want based on their own views. The extremists get shut up, bringing most candidates to the middle ground that most Americans are on. Unfortunately we can't shut up the money unless everyone votes, which historically doesn't happen.
The problem here is that people have the albeit, well deserved, right to assemble. I by no means disagree with that constitutional right. And humans naturally form groups with other people similar to themselves. So no matter what people of like minded ideas will group together. This is actually good because as we know most Americans fall in the middle, while the democratic and republican parties consistently pull candidates to the right or left. So without parties to pull candidates one way or the other, most Americans will have a candidate who agrees with their ideology.
The reason I ask this is because I cannot think of a way to solve this problem. So I ask the hive, how can we solve this issue? I refuse to believe it is unsolvable.
Sorry for the essay...
TL;DR: | Party system is fucked. Cannot ban people's right to form groups. Need candidates that are not constrained by party politics. Solve this problem reddit. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Girlfriend cheated on me
POST: Hi, RA. My girlfriend cheated on me, and I'm furious and really hurt.
We aren't completely serious (because I plan to go back to my country eventually), but she says she loves me all the time. She's Chinese and we both live in a big city.
On Saturday she met a guy from a web site that she says is friendship oriented, not dating. They met once and were cordial. They met later that night (in his apartment, which she claims is because she felt ill that day). After promising there was no pressure and they were just going to talk, and he started to seduce her. They didn't do much--he kissed her a few times (cheek, lips, ear) and she kissed him back a few times before she said stop and resisted. They had a talk, and then he continued to hit on her and try to make her horny. She said she wanted to leave and asked him to walk her home.
She told me about some of this after we got drunk together, but then later while comforting me, told me that she hadn't kissed me, he had only kissed her. I foolishly went into a long rant about the standards of relationships where I'm from, and how it's her responsibility to get herself out of a situation like that. But she was really much more complicit. She actually convinced me she didn't know it was wrong.
I'm alternating between being furious and depressed. I feel betrayed for more reason than one--being monogamous is difficult for me.
She said she loves me and doesn't want an open relationship. I've been so upset with her for the past 24 hours that I can tell she's getting fed up with it.
I don't want to break up with her, because things were pretty good (I like her, the sex was good, she speaks English, and is really attractive.) At the same time, I didn't want to marry her. Can I just cheat on her and call it even? I'm not sure that would make me feel better. What can I do? I hurt. The thought of breaking up with her and having lots of sex (even paid for) doesn't make me feel better.
TL;DR: | Girlfriend kissed a guy a few times then stopped. Later lied to me about it. Came clean when I pressured her. What can I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I want to reconnect with some grade school friends, but I need advice
POST: As I said in the title, I have a couple of grade school friends I want to reconnect with. When grade school ended I went to a different high school than my friends in the group. Since we began high school, I have only talked to them once or twice, but not for any long length of time. Other than these couple of times I have never seen them.
Our two schools are kind of rivals, so when there are mutual sporting events I try to find one of them, but they are never there. We aren't in the same circles anymore, so I don't see them at parties or anything. The only ways of contact I have are Xbox (which they are always on) and Facebook.
I am worried that they might be angered by me if I try to suddenly contact them. I feel like I ditched them a little bit when I went to a different high school because I was our kind of the groups leader (Not to sound pretentious). I'm worried they'll resent me or something. I also don't want to sound creepy after I haven't seen them in two years.
TL;DR: | I want to reconnect with old friends, but I haven't talked to them in a long time. I don't want to be creepy when contacting them, and I am worried they could be mad at me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How can I [25 M] help my sister [27 F]?
POST: My sister, Sarah, is an awesome person. She is kind, generous and caring. She's the kind of person loves all her family and friends, and will not hesitate to help them out if she can. She's got a 10/10 mothering instinct and just wants to take care of everybody. She's also really smart, and passionate about the things she has an interest in.
The problem is that she's... kind of like this really nice car with a starting problem. Sarah lacks motivation. Once she decides to do something, it's brilliant. But to get her started on it is an issue. She's suffered from depression (has just been getting out of another round in the past few months) and is very insecure. She's also terrified of rejection, and I think this is the reason why she's scared to start anything; she doesn't know how it will end up.
She just graduated, and is looking for a job... or trying to. I know my sister is capable of getting a job, but she's just so *scared*. How can I help my sister be the best version of herself? How can I help her motivate herself?
TL;DR: | Have an awesome sister who struggles with insecurities and has a starting problem. How can I help her overcome it and be the best she can be? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Do I have to many (professional) interests? How can I promote my self for buisiness?
POST: *
TL;DR: | I love to work in many different fields: sound, recording, light, advertisement, webstuff, technical stuff. It's hard to find anybody who has a use for my strengths. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [19/M] My girlfriend's Muslim parents found out about us and are now trying to break us apart. Please help.
POST: Hi everyone,
So I just got off the phone with my girlfriend and I'm pretty fucking pissed. Basically, she's had to hide her dating me from her parents because they have a conservative Muslim background and don't want her dating anyone right now, *especially* not a white, atheist boy.
She lives with her aunt and uncle up here at my university. We've been dating for a bit now and through some Facebook privacy goofup on her part, her aunt and uncle found out about us. They have not told her parents yet.
What makes me **FUCKING LIVID** is that these people are trying to control my girlfriend's life. She's an adult, for Christ's sake, so treat her like one.
*Yes*, I understand it's a different culture. But it's a culture my girlfriend wants nothing of. As much as I'd love for her to just tell her folks off, she can't while she's still financially dependent on her dad and lives with her aunt and uncle. They expect her to just study hard and date only later in life, and even then it has to be a Muslim man they approve of. Well **FUCK** you guys.
I don't want to lose her over this. But now they're trying to restrict when she can be on campus and want her to break up with me. I don't know what to do. Those cultural ideas are outdated and do not belong in my girlfriend's life. I want her to just try talking to them, but she's not nearly as confrontational as I am.
Please help, guys. I know this is an odd hour and many of you may not see this, but I'm really at a loss here. This is a culture I do not understand and do not know how to counter effectively, if I can at all.
TL;DR: | GF has Muslim family who wants to break us apart. I say fuck them, but my gf is still dependent on them financially. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: What to do with pics of old SO's? 26[M]
POST: I am a 26 yr old male, and my gf of 2 years is 25. I was only involved with one other girl seriously before my current gf. I dated that girl for 3 years in college, and I thought we would be together for longer. She ended up dumping me, and I was very broken up until I met my current gf. Now things are amazing, and I don't think about the past.
I still have lots of old pics and letters from my old gf that I haven't thrown away. They just sit tucked away in the closet in a bag. I have NO FEELINGS for her, but I also feel like we made important memories, and that she was a big part of my life at one point. In short, I feel like throwing it all away will be something that I regret because they were impactful at one time. I also realize this may not be fair to my current gf because it looks like I still have feelings for another girl, and that I'm basically hiding it from my gf.
So do I keep the stuff or throw it out for good?
TL;DR: | Have pics/letters from old SO, feel like they're important memories, but should I throw away out of respect for my current gf? |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: How do I calculate interest rate? 3,065 in CC debt, want to pay it off before the end of the year.
POST: 21 years old, $3,065 in CC debt, want to pay it off before the end of the year.
I REALLY want to get my shit together and start saving. I know I have a spending problem. Before I can save, I need to pay off my debt. And then my taxes. I was planning on doing the snowball method, but also read up on avalanching. Is there an way way to find out all of my interest rates?
Based on last month's statement balance and the interest I was charged, can I calculate my interest rate? Or do I have to call each lender individually? I opened all of my accounts rather irresponsibly and I Have no idea where any of the paperwork is.
I make roughly $1,800 a month. I am a 1099 contractor so I owe back taxes (about 3k) and I have a delinquent speeding ticket (roughly $350). I just took a second job that will be be adding roughly another $100 income per month.
I have my own studio but have no rent or utility responsibilities. My non-credit bills total $150 a month. That is my car insurance and phone bill.
TL;DR: | Based on last month's statement balance and the interest I was charged, can I calculate my interest rate? Or do I have to call each lender individually? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: unexpected changes. she moved, I'm stuck.
POST: Going through a weird situation not totally sure how to handle it and well going a little stir crazy.
Both my girlfriend and i are 24 years old we've lived together for the past 4 years till recently when she told me she needed her space (3 or 4 months ago). So she moved into a basement suite a couple blocks from my work so I could always see her when i was done my shift.
About a month ago I got a text from no where from her landlord informing me that she had given her notice to move and left the same day, packed up what she could fit in her SUV, sold things to friends or donated it and left, took about 2 weeks to finally get a hold of her. she's currently in Ontario at her fathers house living in his basement so she can pay off her debt quicker. shes asked me to move to be with her. after emailing and faxing resumes for the last 2 months and just taking a break from it for now. I haven't received a single email or phone call regarding any jobs.
so fast forward to today. I fell asleep as soon as i got home from work last night apparently in my sleeping state she called and left multiple voice-mails. Turns out shes slept with a guy and feels horrible about it and apologizes none stop. now I'm not sure if i should move or if i should even visit in 4 weeks. I'm at a lose reddit!
I pretty much just need some advice on the whole situation I've racked my own brain looking for answers and just keep coming back confused and slightly more aggravated with everything/one
TL;DR: | girlfriend moved without telling me, slept with a guy she meet and wants to keep the relationship alive. cant find a job so not sure if its worth moving. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Trans* boyfriend of 5 years is no longer interested in having sex with me?
POST: I am 21 and my boyfriend is 19. He is transgender and has been on testosterone for almost 4 months. For the past 6 months or so, our sex life has been non-existent unless I discuss how upset I am with our relationship and try to communicate with him that a sexless relationship is not what I want, nor do is it what I deserve. He promised it was due to dysphoria, and once he was really feeling like himself, his libido will most likely return.
Except it hasn't. We have been having less sex than we had pre-hormones and last night he told me he isn't sexually interested in me. I said that I accecpt and recognize his feelings, but that is not what I want out of the relationship. He then back tracked and said he thought I was sexy but doesn't want to have sex. All in all it's confusing as fuck and I feel like he isn't being honest with me.
TL;DR: | My boyfriend of 5 years is no longer interested in having sex. Is it because he is trans and on testosterone, or is he just not that into me and doesn't want to admit it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: 25M longest drought of my life. What happened?!
POST: I graduated college at 23 having sealed the deal with 8 girls (I lost it at 20...stupid decision to wait that long). Since then I lived in the middle of nowhere where dating just wasn't an option, but now have lived in one of the biggest cities in the US for nearly a year where meeting girls should be cake. I've made out with 8 more girls since the last time I had sex but for whatever reason, I can't start a relationship, fling, or even get laid.
Now I'm starting to bald and feel like my love life is over and I'm freaking out. Have I just been unlucky or am I screwed now that I look way older than my age and am losing my confidence fast? I know confidence is everything and this is a bad attitude to break a dry spell but I'm really feeling like I'm losing it and it sucks. I'm smart, athletic, have a good job, am tall, and in great shape, but I still feel like an old man trying to get back in the game and it's just not working.
TL;DR: | Not virgin who lost game out of nowhere and now at 25yo feels like his dating life is over and doesn't know how it happened. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by talking to my dentist about Gag reflex's
POST: So a little background. I have been dating my girlfriend for a little over a year. She's perfect for me in every way. Her family is fantastic, I have kind of a shitty home life and they welcomed me into feeling like a part of there family.
So 2 weeks ago during dinner at her house one night the question of which dentist I see came up in conversation. Her Father is a dentist and owns his own practice in my town. I explained to them that though my teeth are fine I have not been in a few years both because I don't have Dental and have quite possibly the worst Gag reflex of anyone I know. He offered/insisted to help me out and told me to come by for a cleaning/x-rays/general check. He said that he was sure he could help me get through the gag reflex issue.
So 3 days ago I go to his office. Immediately upon him sticking his fingers in my mouth I start gagging. He pauses and says wow you weren't kidding. He calmed me down worked with helping me focus on breathing through my nose and generally just made me comfortable to the point where I was able to overcome it. while I still had a few outbursts during the session it was the first time I can ever remember even just being able to get all the way through a dental procedure.
Here is where things go south... Yesterday I go over for dinner again. My girlfriend with her Mother,Father, 26 year old sister, and 15 year old brother all sitting around the table. So of course how the appointment went comes up. We start joking about my Gag reflex and her little brother asks if it is genetic or something. This prompts everyone to start stating how strong of a gag reflex they have.
That's when I say it. "Well Sarah doesn't have a gag reflex at all". Everyone gets quiet my girlfriends eyes get huge and she turns bright red, her older sister begins to uncontrollably laugh and it was quite possibly the most awkward silence I have ever experienced in my life. After what felt like an eternity her mother changed the subject and I left quite quickly.
TL;DR: | Talked about Gag reflex's with my dentist, Ended up telling him his daughter Deepthroats like a champ. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by testing a golf glove
POST: This happened a few years ago.
First, a bit of a background: I was travelling to the US for the first time and I'm from a country where everything is heavily taxed at customs, unless you escape them by pretending to be a business traveller without too much luggage.
Going to an American Wal-Mart for the first time was like being in paradise. A real shopping spree started and I spent a shitload of money on all sorts of foods and goods, ranging from heavy duty aluminum foil to peanut butter. I bought everything that was impossible to find or too expensive to buy where I live.
Among the things I bought there were some golf gloves and a baseball bat. Here's where the FU starts: I was staying at a friend's house which was recently built and refurbished. So I took all the shopping bags to my room and decided to try the golf glove. Needed something to swing and check the grip... well, there's a baseball bat! Not the same thing but enough to test the glove. Glove fits nicely, then I try a swing...
My friend was on the other room. He says this was the loudest and longest noise of shattered glass he ever heard. Afraid I had broken the living room mirror which was floor to ceiling, he rushed to see what happened and found me on my room, to his temporary relief. I had my eyes wide open, frozen on final golf swing position and still holding the baseball bat, looking down and mumbling "dude... I don't know... what the..."
Turns out I didn't check my surroundings before the swing and not only smashed the ceiling fan lamp and the bulb on the upward movement but provoked a rain of glass. Shards were everywhere. The bed, the shopping bags, my luggage, my hair, my shoulders. My friend and host got pissed. Not enough to ruin the trip, thankfully, but still amazed at my stupidity.
Well, I said I would clean everything and pay for a new ceiling fan...
TL;DR: | Smashed the ceiling fan lamp with a baseball bat while hosted at my friend's house, testing my golf glove while indoors. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me[20/F] with my partner [20M] 6months, not sure whether I want to be single
POST: I'm just not sure whether I want to be in a relationship right now. I love my boyfriend dearly and I would feel truly horrible if I ever hurt him, and the time we spend together is wonderful but sometimes when i'm by myself I feel really unsure about whether I actually want to be with anyone in a serious thing right now, because everyone always says your 20s are when you're meant to date lots of people.
I don't want to break up with him, but the relationship is getting serious and I can't ever see us breaking up, which makes me nervous, and there's just this itch for me sometimes when i'm alone where I wonder where this is really heading and if I really want to be here or be alone.
But then later i'll be having a great time with him and thinking 'oh i can't believe I was worrying about that' and horrified that I would ever think about us breaking up as somewhat freeing.
TL;DR: | Is it normal to get an 'itch' about whether you're missing out on being single when you're in a relationship or does it mean you're not ready to be in one |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [19 M] doesn't know what to do about an attempt and contact from [50 M] father.
POST: My father abandoned me when I was young (I don't remember exactly how old I was, blocked most of it, but sub 10). He refused to pay child support, running off spending money on alcohol, drugs and women (This is from hear say, my mother didn't talk about him. However, she did give us information when he tried to contact us a few years after he left, we both refused). However, my mother just handed me a card that he sent her for me, she told me that in it is a phone number and an e-mail address that I can contact him with.
so here is the question, I don't want any contact with him, I can't forgive him and I don't want him in my life, should I make that clear to him in an e-mail or should I just throw away the card hoping he gets the message?
Advice and stories of your experience is welcome, thanks in advance.
TL;DR: | Father who abandoned me sends a card in hopes of contact, I don't want contact. Should I make this clear to him or ignore the card. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Help me [F22] with my mom [F50] who intends to screw over me and my grandma [F80].
POST: Ok I'll try to keep this short and sweet but I will answer questions.
Ok so soon my Grandma wont be able to drive, she's diabetic and her eyes are starting to go ( you know old age and such.) She currently has either a 2010 or a 2012 Camry. Her plan is to have mom give me her 2001 Camry, and mom takes the 2010/ 2012.
*However* it's come to my attention that mom intends to take grandmas car and sell the one she has now and give me none of the money. This is upsetting to me for a couple reasons.
*Reason one is I'm unemployed and have been trying to get a job since last August.
*Reason two having the car could potentially help me get a job since I wouldn't have to force my hours around my boyfriends schedule, or the bus schedule.
My moms reasoning for selling the car without my input is:
*I can't afford gas.
*And I can't afford the insurance.
The other reason I could afford the car is my grandma has even offered to pay the insurance until I could get a job. My grandma also said that if I were to take her to appointments (doctor, hair, chiropractor) she would pay for the gas. Basically what I'm asking is should I confront/ talk to my mom or bypass her and go directly to my grandma?
TL;DR: | Mom is trying to keep money from selling a car that I'm supposed to getting, while getting a new car for herself. I need help! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [23/m] Can't trust my girlfriend (26/f) out dancing!
POST: My girlfriend is going out line dancing with her roommate and we were all talking about it and they start talking about the exciting part of dancing. She says that she loves two-step because of the feeling she gets when a man spins her around on the dance floor and controls her. She said its exciting to feel dominated/controlled and makes her "curious to see what else he can do." After discussing how her attitude behind it upset me she said that the attitude and feeling she expressed was just from when she was with her ex, who she was not satisfied with. Since she was not receiving the emotional and physical needs from him, she sought it out on the dance floor. She insists that I meet these needs for her and it would be different now that those needs are met. She wants to go out without me so she can have time to spend with her roommate, which I am all for. But even after talking about it, the whole thing makes me uneasy.
I know that she is in a different mindset now but it is all too easy to fall back into an old mindset when in a familiar place.
Background: My girlfriend and I have been dating about a month and it has been the most incredible relationship of my life, but the problem of distrust started at the beginning of our relationship. When it started she was dating her long distance boyfriend and we were both just looking for sex. Essentially I was the "other guy". Our feeling grew and broke up with her boyfriend and we got together. I was not the first guy she cheated with on him because she was never sexually satisfied with him in the first place.
A few other notes:
-she is a very flirtatious person naturally and has said she does it because she likes the attention.
-she has acted inappropriately (feeding a mutual friend of ours) when drinking while I was there (she was very drunk)
TL;DR: | Girlfriend was talking about very dancing with other men in a sexualized manner, although she insists it will be different now that we are together. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (20M) am in love with a good friend (20F) but she has a boyfriend and I'm in greif
POST: It all started quite a while ago when I prematurely asked her out. She rejected me and I was sad for a while but easily recovered. She told me she didn't want a boyfriend at the time with school and all. I think we hadn't built up a close enough relationship. I settled for the friend-zone quite happily for a couple of months.
Then out of nowhere she says yes when one of my friends asks her out. Excuse me? I was devastated. It was worse because I think rather poorly of this friend. I thought "what does he have that I don't?" I mostly got over it in a couple of months and decided I needed to talk to other girls.
I've been trying for a while but haven't found anyone particularly interesting enough to ask out. I've been pretty lonely like this for a while now. Lately I've started to talk with this girl a lot more often again and now we have a very close friendship. I'll bother her when I need help with my crippling loneliness and she comes to me when her boyfriend isn't around for her.
But now I'm starting to get very strong feelings for her. And it's made worse when I see her boyfriend holding her and such. When I know they're alone together I can't think of anything else. I am starting to become painfully jealus and sour. Furthermore I often worry about what he may be doing with her (She's a fairly shy girl and I feel like he may be pressuring her out of her comfort zone). Also she will spend money on him but he wont spend anything on her.
So here is my question. I need advice on the issue. Do I try to convince her I'm the better man and take her away from him because she does often complain that he's ignoring her and I surely wouldn't do that If she was mine. Or do I try to move on and try to find another girl to drive me crazy?
TL;DR: | I'm lonely and the girl I love has a boyfriend that treats her poorly, do I try to take her or do I move on and find a different girl to drive me crazy? Thanks in advance. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Just got kicked out of my house. Here's my situation. Has anyone else been here or anyone else that can give me insight on what to do next?
POST: Reddit, there has to be someone out there with insight that they can give me.
I just got kicked out of my house for smoking weed. I have nowhere to go, no car, no amenities or resources to my name other than my laptop, and maybe my phone if I'm allowed to keep it. I'm 19 years old studying at community college because my parents pulled me out of Illinois State last year for smoking weed also. I have a job for Jimmy Johns delivering sandwiches, but I don't know how my job will hold up now that I don't have a car.
Anyways, I don't have any family to call for a place to stay, all of my friends are at their respective colleges, and I can't even communicate with them other than facebook. I have 7,000 dollars to my name right now, and I need a car in order to make any sort of living, so I will probably have around 5,500 after buying it, and then I need to pay for insurance so I have no idea how much that will be. What should I do next? Anyone ever been in this situation before? I just straight up don't know what to do. Don't know how to do taxes, don't have a debit card, and don't know what bills or anything my parents are going to throw on my shoulders.
Thanks guys, hopefully someone can help me.
TL;DR: | got kicked out of my house, no car no phone, have 7,000 dollars with nowhere to stay. What do I spend it on and where do I go? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by texting my friend a reference from the movie Airplane!
POST: Backstory: My friend and I have kind of been on the rocks for the better part of 6 months now. He has a lot going on in his life, so it's understandable, but we've kind of drifted from best friends to good friends.
What happened: I had texted a few of my friends to get lunch today. This friend in particular, who I had expected not to respond at all, responded quickly and enthusiastically with a "Yes!".
I responded "Great, I'll drive!" to which he responds "Can we stop at Best Buy after?"
Since I'm the wannabe comedian in the friend-group, I say "Surely you can't be serious!" expecting the response "I am serious; and don't call me Shirley" from the beloved movie Airplane!, which I know he's seen many times.
Instead, I got cursed out over text message, was called selfish and mean, and was told that if he decided to go that he would just drive himself since I'm too self-absorbed to stop at a place that's on the way home.
The outcome: Here we are now. He won't talk to me. I tried explaining, but to no avail. He did not show up at lunch either.
TL;DR: | Airplane! reference went over friend's head, he thought I was being rude, hasn't spoken to me since. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 M] with my gf [23F]of 2.5 years, did I overreact and was I wrong?
POST: So I'll keep this short and simple, because I feel I am in the right, but I guess I just need the approval of internet people and to justify my actions. And some of your advice is actually really good in this subreddit.
So my gf and I have been dating for 2.5 years, and I believe around April sometime she met this guy and they went out on a date behind my back. I knoew about the guy, but not about the date and he ends up leaving the state for about 4 months. I didn't find out until about August and I had asked her if she still talked to him (I wasn't too fond of him) and she said "no". I left it at that, but around August sometime I see a mysterious text from a name I don't recognize, turns out it was him and they had been texting, snap chatting, FB messaging, whatever the entire time....blah blah blah some arguments occur and she lies and lies...but we get over it, and she promises to never communicate with him again (this is important for later; and also I still do not trust her)
So turns out, she still snapchats him months after I find out, even though she promised never to communicate with him. And just last night I found she sent him a snapchat, even though she told me it was an innocent one (a pciture of the sky, or her dog I don't quite remember). But that's not the point, she lied and broke her promise even after breaking my trust earlier in the year.
So reddit was I wrong to call it quits after an innocent snapchat, but a huge broken promise? Also, this is not the first time; I believe we are past the point of "talking it out".
TL;DR: | gf texts some guy for months, I catch her, we fight, she promises never to communicate with him anymore, and then I still catch her snapchatting him quite frequently. Was I wrong to end it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [24M] I can only attract girls I'm not into...is loneliness better than empty relationships?
POST: I've been in three or four serious relationships so far and not one of them was with a girl I was really into--they all just kind of fell into my lap. Girl was into me, it was convenient, I was tired of being lonely, etc. so I went with it. The girls were all attractive, nice, and my friends/family generally liked them. Not bottom feeders by any means, but they just didn't do it for me. I need a girl who is passionate about something. None of these girls had a passion for anything. They were just living their lives.
Right now I'm several dates in with a girl who is a solid 7 or 8 out of 10, has some mutual friends, is nice, good sex, etc but we have zero in common and again no passion beyond shopping and brunch.
There have been 2 or 3 girls I've known that I've been absolutely floored by and feel like I could have had a great relationship with. I even got a couple dates with them but it never worked out--I usually get phased out.
To be honest, I'm not really looking for "the one" at this young of an age, I just want for once to be in a relationship with a girl I really like or potentially love. 1-Any advice? 2-Is it better to be lonely or in a relationship with someone you don't love?
TL;DR: | Can only land girls I'm not into; want to figure out how to fix it. In the mean time, is being lonely better or worse than being in an empty relationship? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: Another childhood TIFU
POST: I read the story about the guy stomping the cup that he placed on a nail to keep it still and it reminded me of the time when I was a small child that knew everything at a young age. I had seen in some cartoon where a character stepped on a rake and it hit him in the face. Since I was clearly a genius, I knew that the rake stomping bit was clearly BS and I went outside to prove it. I found a rake and placed it in the yard and then I stomped the ever loving shit out of it. You can imagine my surprise when an instant later I had a very sharp vertical pain emanating from my face as well as two busted lips. That day I had a TIFU and a TIL moment in about a millisecond.
TL;DR: | Genius kid me stomped a rake and didn't expect to get hit in the face. Got hit in the face. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Am I [20M] wrong for establishing a rule that my girlfriend [20F] and I can only drink when together because she cheated on me whilst drunk?
POST: I have never been the controlling type in relationships.
My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year now, but we have previously dated in the past for about 3 years before taking a small break.
A few months ago my girlfriend visited a friend at a college and attended "DayGlow" a rave/festival/electronic dance music type thing that tours at colleges. She ended up getting wasted very early on into the night and hooked up with some kid on the dance floor. I did not attend the festival and found out a few days later.
She confronted to me about it and we had an arguement as I have loved this girl since early highschool and nothing like this has ever happened before. Trying my hardest not to end the relationship I established a rule that we weren't allowed to drink without our SO present, something we both agreed on. But lately, I constantly find myself asking her if she's drinking whenever she goes out to a BBQ or someones house.
It's hard to cope when someone cheats. I have heard on /r/relationships that being too drunk isn't an excuse and merely don't like the idea of her drinking without me because of the fear of something like this happening again. She thinks it's slightly controlling but I am slowly working on building trust again. I completely trust her, I love her, but I do not trust her drinking without me there. Am I wrong? Am I taking this the completely wrong way?
TL;DR: | My girlfriend cheated on me while drunk without me present at a festival, I made a rule that we can't drink without each other around anymore. Am I being controlling or just trying to save this relationship? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Just found out the long-term (2+yrs) GF of the guy (M/30) I'm (F/23) dating died two months ago...
POST: I've been seeing this guy for three weeks (met on POF) and everything has been going really, really well. We've talked about how the chemistry between us is unlike anything either of us have ever experienced.
After many great dates I decided to look up this guy on Facebook. Of course, I glance through his public profile pictures and see many photos with him and this same chick. Type the girl's name into search and the first thing that comes up is a "In Celebration Of ____ Life" page. I click. It's her. Turns out she passed two months ago.
So here's the thing... He hasn't mentioned anything about this. I mean, I know three weeks in it might be a little weird to say, "Oh hey, by the way, my girlfriend died right before we met." So now I only know about this because of Facebook stalking...
Do I bring this up with him? If so, how?
Honestly, no idea how to go forward. We've only been chilling for three weeks, but things have really been awesome. Would like to continue seeing this guy? Is it worth it?
TL;DR: | Met an amazing guy. After three weeks and many dates, I Facebook creeped to find out his long term girlfriend died two months ago... What now... |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (23F) found my Significant Other's (21M) porn.
POST: Okay so I guess I really should have known this would happen someday. I knew he watched porn. I don't particularly like it, but I don't consider it cheating and I'm not going to attempt to make him stop.
He had forgotten his Nintendo 3ds with me and I opened it up and was poking around. I opened the Internet browser and bam...porn everywhere. I was surprised because I didn't really expect to find it on a 3ds.
So, knowing what he likes to watch on his own time is a little weird for me. I have some self-esteem issues so my mind quickly started comparing myself to these girls. That mixed with the guilt from looking through his game system without his permission, and I'm feeling like a mess.
How do I tell him about this? I feel like I'm not going to be able to just forget about it and act like I never found it. I don't like the thought of hiding this from him.
TL;DR: | I looked through my SO's 3DS and found porn in the Internet browser. How do I tell him about what I've done? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (26m) have been Engaged 3x currently engaged and failing again (to 23f)
POST: I (27) met my fiance (23) about 2.5 years ago. We work retail together and I'm a college student. Currently a senior. She went back to school, currently a failing freshman.
We were both in relationships when we met. My gf broke up with me and she immediately started flirting with me. After about a month she ended things with her bf of 4 years to date me (for the record, she never cheated on him).
For the first several months everything was pretty good. I proposed after about 8 months telling her i dont want to get married until im through college and it seems that things have been downhill since.
We do the dance with no pants about 1 - 2 times a month max (which has been the norm from the beginning but really low for me). I'm good with money, she's not so much.
She gets upset if I spend too much time with my family. She was extremely irritated that I decided not to go to a concert with her. I didn't go because my grandfather passed away and I spent the day installing a security system for my 87 year old grandmother who lives alone now. It was a 13 hour install.
Most of my family doesn't like her, but then, they haven't liked most of my gfs.
She seems unhappy most of the time but insists that she loves me and wants to make things work but talking about our problems doesn't seem to help.
All of my ex 's have kids now and a few are married. I'm worried I just over think things and need to let go and work on being happy where I am or I'll never get married/have a family.
Am I being rational thinking I should start over again or am I over thinking it? I'm wondering if there comes a point that I should stop focusing on what's wrong and just stick it out, even if I'm unhappy.
TL;DR: | engaged for the 3rd time, thinking of leaving fiance for things that I feel are reasonable but not sure if it's all just me being over critical. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by telling my sister her boyfriend cheated on her
POST: My sister has always told me to tell her if her mqn fucks up, cheating, talking to other women, ect. So i was on social media and i saw her man with another woman. Knowing that if i didnt say anything to her she would have found out or she would have asked me why i did not tell her. So being the younger sister i figured that it would be best to just bring her the news. Upon locating her engrossed in her video game i figued that before she gets pissed off, bite the bullet and tell her.
I went into her room to 'let the cat out of the bag'. I told her to pause the game so i could tell her something important. To which she just says im listening and continues to play her game. Now that she is playing her game still instead of actually answering me by pausing the game, i tell her that i found a picture of her man with another woman.
Now that she has been playing her ge the entire duration of this statement/conversation she flips out on me. Cursing at me throwing objects at me, whatever was closest to her she as throwing; pens, pencils word searches, empty cans of soda, bottles of selzer in various fullness, tv remotes, and a decoration plant. Why? Because i made her die s she ws playing her game. I tell her to calm down because i have something important to tell her.
So she asks me what possibly could be important to cause her to die in her game. Being how livid i was to the fact that she told me to i needed to tell her, i just blurted out 'YOUR BOYFRIEND IS CHEATING ON YOU' she bursts into tears and i show her th picture. She looks at it and says to me 'he isn't cheating one you bitch, thats his cousin'.
TL;DR: | sister wanted me to tell her when her boyfriemd cheats on her, found image of him and another woman, turns out it was his cousin. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [Breakups] How do I [20F] get over the fact that my ex [24M] ruined our relationship?
POST: We broke up last October. We talked about it a couple times. His mom was diagnosed with cancer while we were dating. He asked me to see him less. He pushed me away. He had multiple issues with the relationship (all of which I'd been happy to work on had he communicated), and "dropped hints" that I never picked up on. He wanted to see me more when his mom was diagnosed. Despite what he was saying. He wanted me to initiate sex more, but then would reject me constantly. And make some passive aggressive comment about how I shouldn't have done it so early, or late. **All** of our unhappiness in the relationship would have been solved if he **communicated**.
It breaks my heart. Because I love his mom. And I wanted to be there for him. I wanted to hold him, and talk to him. But, I kept all this quiet, because he told me that he didn't want any of that. I went through **months** of anguish for **nothing**.
I'm pissed. I'm sad. I don't ever want him back. He's a major dick. He would feed into my insecurities whenever I made a mistake. Then get mad that I was insecure.
I had such a wonderful view of him. And in a matter of weeks. My entire world view of him is changed. I just want to be over this already.
TL;DR: | ex boyfriend ruined our relationship by refusing to communicate. And decided to be adolescent and drop hints. Made me feel like constant shit for no good reason. How do I get over it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Has anybody had a bad eBay experience with getting an item that was described incorrectly? Was it solved?
POST: So I bought this used external Hard Drive, LaCie D2 Quadra to be exact 2TB model. It was sold by a good seller and it was a buy it now listing. It was a fair price for a 2TB so I bought it before somebody beat me to it. My bad experience started to happen as soon as I paid for it because the seller didn't send it for a week. So I messages him no response and finally he sent it and apologized for not responding. So I decide the drive and I am a bit dissatisfied with the appearance because it was dirty and it looked like it used to have stickers all over it. But I could've lived with that especially since it was used. But then I plugged it in. It wasn't 2Tb. Instead it was 1.5Tb. I thought it was partitioned but after reformatting it wasn't. I look up the serial on the LaCke website and guess what. 1.5 Tb. I contacted the seller, he didn't respond once again. I opened a case and then he responds. He states that the drive is 2tb and told me to reformat and that the LaCie site says its 2Tb and that it probably needs reformatting, which I already did, and that he strictly says no refunds. Well this is against eBay rules to sell something misleading. So I explain that I did the reformatting check the site and it is all 1.5Tb. So that is my current bad experience with this asshole. By the way what should I do? And has anybody had a similar experience?
TL;DR: | Bought a 2tb hard drive, got a 1.5tb instead, requested a refund, sellers a prick. What should I do now that I opened a case? Did you have a similar experience? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: He [27, M] wants the key to my [25, M] apartment.
POST: I am in a 8 month relationship with my boyfriend and within that time, I am renting a studio apartment, living alone. It's on the bottom floor, and it's not in the worst part of the neighborhood, but it's also not the nicest.
Our relationship is pretty good, we only briefly broke up once (fault to my own), but doing great now.
He likes to stay over every once in a while during the week. Problem is, I leave for work earlier than he leaves for class. He suggested today to let him stay as I leave, and he can lock the bottom lock on his way out. I suggested that the top lock wouldn't be locked, so he says I should give him a key to solve that problem.
I told him I wasn't sure and started to get lectured on trust and I shouldn't be afraid of anything. My problem with that is that a couple weeks ago, he joked about coming over without me knowing to "surprise" me, and he showed me how easy it could be to break into my place if I don't lock my windows (on ground floor). I mention these times to him and he keeps saying it was a joke.
Still feeling uneasy about lending him a key, I'd much rather him just lock the bottom lock on his way out next time. Maybe I'm being paranoid. Not sure what to do.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend wants key to apartment so he can sleep in as I leave for work, worried about general safety and not sure what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [18f] I'm Jealous of my Boyfriend's [15f] Female Friend
POST: I'm 18, my boyfriend is 15, and so is his friend. Throughout out 7 month relationship he's maintained a close friendship with this girl, they've been friends for years and I know they have no romantic history together. But I still do get jealous when he hangs out with her. And how sometimes when my boyfriend and I hang out, she tried texting him, and that makes me really upset. How can I talk to him about it without seeming like I'm trying to control him? I don't want to end their friendship at all, I just want him to distance himself from her a bit and maybe not talk to eachother as often, especially if it's while I'm with him.
TL;DR: | I'm jealous of my boyfriends friendship with a girl, and I want them to not be so close. But I don't want to be controlling. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by going to the gym
POST: So this happened about an hour ago.
I recently received [this shirt] from the reddit gifts secret santa and decided that i should wear it to the gym today, as it would be a bit of a laugh.
Getting to the gym, I start off with a quick 20 min spin cycle workout and move on to the weights, where I set up on the calf machine. I see that the weight already set on the machine is at 100+ kg and quickly change it to <60 kgs, as I didn't wanna pull anything.
That's pretty much where the fuck up begins.
So when I set up on said machine, I didn't notice that someone had already left their shirt and phone right next to it (which apparently is gym code for: Someones on this machine, gtfo) and ignorantly continued my workout. Out of no where, massive dude pops up right in front of me (who i later found out to be a national rugby player) and says "Hey, smartarse, you can see i'm working out here, right? You wanna work on this six pack of yours then you can head over there." He points to the direction of another group of machines. I apologize profusely and leave the machine to head over to the ones he pointed out, wondering why he was being such a dick and also wondering why he specifically suggested a six pack workout.
That was when I remembered I wore that stupid fucking shirt.
Pretty much maximum embarrassment, left gym as soon as I worked it all out, shirt won't be worn to the gym again (sorry secret santa).
TL;DR: | Went to the gym wearing a witty shirt, stole a rugby players machine, said rugby player goes to continue his workout to find me in his machine leaving me extremely embarrassed. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [18 M] have been with my girlfriend [19 F] for a year and 4 months, will be meeting her parents soon but a lot of what they "know" about me isn't true
POST: background:
I met my girlfriend online, we'd been friends for about a year and started meeting in person roughly once per month in London(we both live in the UK, London is pretty much in between us both). We've been a couple for well over a year now, but her parents only found out about half a year ago and she told them (originally, when they knew we had been seeing each other but thought we were friends) that I used to go to one of her old schools as a child, as opposed to how we really met, on the internet. The reason for this is how strict and protective her parents are of her, and how much they dislike her interacting with people from the internet.
Her brother, who knows about most of the stuff and is cool with it, allowed her to invite me to his wedding which will be in October, however her parents want to meet me first, in the summer or something. Her parents are almost definitely going to ask me about growing up in their town, and knowing their daughter in school, which means we're going to have to tell them that we met online and that we've been together for over a year. They'll find out that she's been lying to them all this time, and that I'm not entirely who they thought I was.
I would be surprised if both her mum and dad were okay with it, it seems like her dad is already unhappy about meeting me and definitely about the idea of me staying over, if I go to her brother's wedding.
Just to clarify why my girlfriend lied about me in the first place, had her parents known we've only spoken over the internet they would not have let her meet me in person, let alone be in a relationship with me. My parents were totally cool with it from the beginning and have met her multiple times
TL;DR: | meeting my long distance girlfriend's parents, truth will probably come out, worried about the result and how to break it to them. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: I did CPR for the first time the other day.
POST: While im in school to become a firefighter i volunteer with my local fire department and do ride alongs at a Fire Station. On a Call recently it was to a patient in cardiac arrest, i jumped on CPR while we treated her. She didn't end up making it, most people would be horrified see someone die, i really didn't feel anything. I felt for the family that was there because i can only imagine what it would be like to see that happen to one my family members.
Ive been around the fire service and heard many stories about bad calls for years (my dad, uncle and cousin are firefighters), so maybe its kinda desensitized me to these kinds of things. I don't feel bad that i don't feel bad, i just wonder why.
TL;DR: | Did CPR on a patient who died, i didn't feel horrible seeing a dead person/ a person who died that i tried to save. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Should [30/M] reach out to my unknowing half-brother to get in contact with my father?
POST: I have never met or spoken to my biological father once in my life. My mother became pregnant due to some crazy meds she was on that basically canceled out her birth control. She thought all was well because my father was separated from his wife and she thought that this would just accelerate their relationship. Turns out that when my father said he was separated from his wife he meant she wasn't there with him at that moment (Father was a Blue-Angels pilot and my mother was hot and bothered for Pilots after watching Top Gun to many times). They both came to an agreement that she wouldn't get an abortion (obviously), that he would pay child support, and I legally could not have contact with him until I was 18.
Well, I am 30 now and I have recently had a kid and my curiosity has come to the point I can no longer ignore it. I have tried to look up contact information for my father to reach out to him but since he now wears a few stars on his shoulder contact information is next to impossible to find. I knew from stories my mother had told me that I have a half-brother very close to my age and what his name was. Thanks to the internet I found him on Facebook and I also found out I have a younger half brother.
I want to get to know my father. I'm not angry with him, I don't want money, and I also don't want to ruin his family. I know that sometimes these reunions don't go like the do on Oprah where we both cry, hug, and say we love each other but I can't ignore wanting to know my father anymore. Hell, he may feel the same way about me but is afraid I am angry and wont reach out to me.
My only in I can find is through my half-brothers. I can't help but think it would be terribly wrong of me to show up and say, "Hey dude, we have the same Dad because your Dad is a liar face." Should I just move on? I am just torn with how to handle this.
TL;DR: | Maverick knocked up my Mom and told me to go away until I am 18. I 30 now and want to talk to him but I can only find my half-brothers contact information. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: M[23] Broke up with GF[21]. First real love. What to expect?
POST: I broke up with her because this is what she said she might want. She admittedly doesn't know what she wants, and I feel pretty broken up about it.
We had the kind of relationship where I just loved and loved and loved, and it was simply too intense at times. I was dependent, clingy, and definitely too naive. Naivete in this instance is strange because I knew I was behaving as though I was naive, but it just felt so damn good that I kept doing it.
She's been in relationships since before she could truly comprehend the gravity of their impact on her, and because of that it's left her confused. She's a truly awesome lady, and I don't hold much bitterness about the whole ordeal.
Technically this is a "break," but it's hard to say what that means. I write this story as though I'm a sappy romantic who wouldn't leave a girl in this situation, but I did, because I'm pretty sure it's what she wanted.
She has this funny way of not being able to pinpoint exactly how she's feeling, and because of that I've developed the ability to sort of discern what she wants, or how she feels.
This whole thing sucks, and I think I made the right choice, but I wanted to ask this sub for advice. I'll take the bad with the good news, and I sincerely appreciate your time.
Thanks.
TL;DR: | Broke up with girl. Didn't want to. I think it's what she wants. Still very much in love. What should I expect in this grieving process? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [21M] girlfriend [21F] freaked out at me lastnight. Is she overreacting?
POST: We only see each other on weekends due to distance, so every night we fall asleep on the phone together. She has anxiety, which I completely support her for. Lastnight at around 3:00 AM, she kept calling my name to wake me up. She told me she had a bad dream, and needs to hear me talk. I just kept saying how excited I am to see her this weekend, etc, and dozed back off. I woke up to her yelling "Fine, so much for me coming to you with my problems. Maybe I won't next time" (or something along those lines, I was half asleep) and she hung up the phone. Was I being insensitive without realizing it?
TL;DR: | Girlfriend, with anxiety, had bad dream. Woke me up, and I fell asleep while trying to reassure her. She's angry. |
SUBREDDIT: r/travel
TITLE: First time putting together a travel plan for a trip in Europe....Help
POST: My parents are taking me to Europe this Summer and they gave me the task of putting together a travel plan (sort of) for maybe about a week to ten days in Europe. I don't need to worry much about financial issues like what hotels we should stay in and how much it would cost to travel from place to place or how we would travel (I'm guessing a rental car) for I am only fourteen but I do need to write down where we are going, what we will do in each city and places I would particularly like to eat at. When I go to Europe, I would love to experience the food and the feel of being there as in pretty much all the amazing things that are there. My main goals are London, Paris, Prague, Munich, and Venice. I've looked at a map and I'm not too confident that I chose the best places because of the distance and placement of each city as this is my first time doing this but this is why I ask Reddit for help and tips. I don't ask you guys to do all the work for me because this seems like a good lesson for me but I would appreciate little tidbits of info to make this an efficient trip.
TL;DR: | I'm organizing a travel to Europe but I need info and tips from people who have been to this place and can provide tips on where the best places are. |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: Mistakenly reported someone for drunk driving; did I do the right thing?
POST: So today an...odd...guy showed up at my door. He didn't seem to know where he was and claimed that he lived in my apartment. In addition, he said that my next door neighbors' garden had not been there the day before. His speech was slurred, he was talking someone incoherently, and could barely stand up. In addition, he had driven his car straight through a parking space and over the curb and had parked it on the grass/sidewalk. After mumbling for a few minutes, he introduced himself, thanked me for my time, and drove away.
Needless to say, the above behavior reminded me very much of an extremely drunk person. So I called the police and let them know, gave them the guy's license plate, etc. Turns out he has some medical condition (and is taking medication) that does not make it unsafe for him to drive, but can make him look a bit loopy. Or at least, that's what the police told me when they showed up a few minutes later and had talked to him a while. On top of that, he lives in my apartment complex.
So now I just feel pretty awful for reporting someone for drunk driving who wasn't actually drunk, wasting his time, the police's time, and introducing whatever might come of all his neighbors seeing three cops show up at his door and drill him for a bit. So what do you guys think; did I do the right thing in this situation?
Bonus question: what do I do if I run into him again? I'm pretty sure I'd just die from shame right then and there.
TL;DR: | Encountered a drunk-looking guy driving, told the police, and it turns out he has some medical condition instead of being drunk and is ok to drive. Was calling the police the right thing to do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Need input on a personal finance app, questions inside. [Serious]
POST: First off I making a finance app and I am looking to find out common file formats I should consider supporting to load a users financial data, as a side not I will not be supporting logging into a users financial institution ( i.e. Mint does this ). If you think the idea is stupid because I am not supporting trusting a third party with your financial information, target ring a bell?(Mint holds everything and network security is not bulletproof), as my app will be using the local storage on your phone so I do not even hold onto a users financials at all. Although the user will have the option of using a google drive account or the cloud to save a back up of the information.
I want to support some common file formats, what should they be? Some interest calculators and other financial calculations, what should they be? I also want to have a feature about if someone can afford something and the possible risk of the purchase. Any input is welcome except for telling me you will not use it because it doesn't give me your bank account info.
TL;DR: | What file formats should a finance app support? What calculators should it support? I don't care if you won't use it because it doesn't automatically have access to all your financial accounts. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by waking up and having sex. [NSFW]
POST: So, I need to give a little bit of a back story. My morning ritual after I wake up is to smoke a cigarette, take out my dogs, let the cats in, and feed the animals.
Well, this morning, I was feeling a little frisky. I rolled over in bed and nudged my boyfriend to wake up. He got the hint after I was... should I say..*feeling him up*.
Well, we got in the mood, and I was instantly put into doggy. While face down, my puppy decided to jump on the bed in lick my face. "GO AWAY LOLA" we barked at her while my boyfriend pushed her out of the way. Now, we have a queen size bed, so she decided to go on the edge and whimper while we were going at it.
She's whining and whining, all whilst telling her to shut up. "She must just be hungry. This is about the time I feed her" I suggested. Well, my boyfriend rolls me over into missionary and our puppy decided to come a little closer. Pushed her away again. Then we both smelled this distinguished smell along with a warmth all under and around us. THE LITTLE SHIT PISSED NEXT TO US WHILE WE WERE DOING IT!
FUCK! SHE NEEDED TO GO OUT! SHE WASNT WHINING BECAUSE SHE WAS HUNGRY!
It was all over my legs and back, all over my boyfriends hands and legs. Hell, I think a little got on our poo tang and skin flute.
I was so mad. We instantaneously threw her outside and proceeded to shower like we never showered before.
TL;DR: | Had morning sex with the boyfriend. Didnt let the dog out, so she proceeded to piss on us while having sex. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [24M] feeling ignored by gf [22F] when with friends
POST: We've been together for a month now.
Whenever we're with friends, the gf hates acting close with me. We don't sit next to each other, and we rarely talk.
When it's just us, though, we're very close.
I understand that there's "us time" and "friends time", but I feel like a stranger around her when we're with friends.
We were like this when we were just dating. I've brought it up before, and she said she wasn't comfortable taking that step yet. I was hoping that would have changed after we were official, but it hasn't.
Her ex of a LTR broke up with her because he felt she never seemed to care for him, and he felt that she would rather spend time with her friends than with him. I dismissed it as him being insecure, but now that I've gotten to know this girl, I'm beginning to think his reasoning may have been legitimate.
I don't want to break up over something that may be insignificant. Am I placing too much weight on an aspect of our relationship that shouldn't really matter? I want to be closer with her when it's not just the two of us, but it's not what she wants.
TL;DR: | Gf acts close when we're alone but distant when with friends. I want to be closer but she doesn't. Enough reason to break up? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Lab assistants, technicians and administrators of reddit, Where do you buy all of your chemical supplies and equipment?
POST: I am not affiliated with any institution that may have standard channels for acquiring bulk chemicals or laboratory equipment, but would like to purchase some for personal use.
I'm not looking for anything really out of the ordinary, in fact right now I'm just looking for bulk amounts of isopropyl alcohol, something I could easily buy at like walmart or something, but particularly with the iso, I'm finding that it's far more expensive from chemical suppliers than it is from normal stores. For instance, [this] is the cheapest iso I could find above 90% which is $24 for a 500mL bottle, where as at walmart I could get 471mL for like $2.
What are the restrictions for more... sensitive chemicals like strong acids, industrial solvents and specific chemicals (for instance, where would I go for a kilogram of Copper (II) Sulfate)? I suppose I should mention at this point that I'm inside the US and reiterate that I have no affiliation with any relevant institution, I just love chemistry.
I understand that there are a few key reagents that are unfortunately impossible to get without having the FBI/NSA/DEA/DOJ crawl all the way up my ass for, but I don't know of a full list or if one even really exists.
TL;DR: | Where can I buy chemicals/reagents in bulk with no institutional affiliation and without winding up on an FBI watchlist? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Alternative ways to dealing with depression?
POST: I'm 17 and have suffered from depression since I was about 16. I won't go in to details right now but just please don't automatically assume that because i'm 17 that its all teen anxt and we are all self absorbed pricks. I am after genuine help here, but i guess haters gonna hate. Either way, I saw a psychologist once a week when i was early 16's for a few months, and it kinda helped, but still never really got over it. Recently (last 4 months) have sucked balls, and have been back to see a different psychologist (old one is on maternity leave) and tried out two different anti-depressants (Zoloft and Mirtizapine), and neither of them really work. The side effects outweigh the little good they do.
I was wondering if anyone could offer alternative methods to just seeing a psychologist and taking medication, because neither seem to work. I am a musician and love music, so i was thinking music or art therapy might be a good option. Does anyone have experience from any of these?
TL;DR: | i have depression and doctors and meds do not do the job for whatever reason, anybody have alternative methods they would like to share? |
SUBREDDIT: r/college
TITLE: If you hear something pay attention: an awful first post, but I want to say this, after last night
POST: Even if it's normal for your neighborhood keep an ear out. Because it might not be. I heard a girl sobbing, and crying last night and I assumed it was a bad breakup or a bad trip (I live on the bar walk home) I heard a guy talking to her. I thought it was normal until it was too late. She screamed "oh god somebody please wake up!", while pounding on the window of the car (I think--I don't know what was being pounded on), I looked out the window and this guy had this tiny girl in his arms cramming her into an suv.
I called 911 while I running down the stairs and then after the car. The car circled back around the block and tuned in the same direction it did the first time it left, the girl wasn't visible the second time (I don't know why it did this). A neighbor came out across the street half a minute after I did, while the car circled back (because of the screaming and what he saw out the window), and he got a partial plate and details (my night vision is crap I guess or I was scared). I don't think it's much to go on though.
TL;DR: | Look the hell out the window if it sounds bad. It's not nosy, its the decent thing to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by getting a severe sunburn and ruining plans I've had scheduled for 6 months
POST: So obligatory this didn't happen today, but on saturday. A little back story first, in August of 2015 I found the artist that I wanted to do a watercolor tattoo to honor my grandmother's passing. I submitted a request for an appointment and was put in the wait list until she started booking appointments again. In January I heard back from her and the earliest she could fit me in was june.
So fast forward to this past Saturday (6 days away from my tattoo appointment) and I decided that it would be a fantastic day to take my son to a waterfront festival and spend time with my mom as she is moving across country on Tuesday. It was a great time, he played in one of those child sized hampster balls, he made a wooden boat, got his face painted... the works. I realized my error early on that I had forgotten sunscreen and being a mother my initial instinct was to shield my son from the sun, with my own body.
I am such an idiot. I'm a fair skinned red head, and I KNOW the sun and I do not get along. So now, I have a SEVERE sunburn complete with blisters. And now I'll need to reschedule my appointment that I have been waiting almost a year for. Oh and my son? Yeah he tans, so any sun he did get on saturday just added to his brown-ness. Meanwhile I look like a lobster and can't move.
TL;DR: | scheduled a tattoo appointment 6 months out (been waiting almost a year) and ruined my plans by getting the worst sunburn I've ever had, less than a week before I'm supposed to go under the needle. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I have been in a serious relationship for 2.5 years and I think I need to end it.
POST: I have been dating a guy that I met freshman year of college. Throughout our relationship I have caught him numerous times chatting and texting with other girls outside of the relationship. I have confronted him about these issues time and time again, however he always just apologized, a couple of weeks would go by and he would start doing it again. He chalked it up to it being a "sex addiction" and that he has to watch porn and chat with girls. While I see sex addiction as a legitimate addiction, I am not entirely sure if that is what my boyfriend has? I have been hurt by him so much but I love him and want him to be healthy and stop all of that behavior. Any suggestions?
TL;DR: | My boyfriend claims he has a sex addiction and continues to talk to other girls during our relationship and does not want to change his ways. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I [21F] tell my mom [50F] that I'm pregnant?
POST: Can't believe I'm posting this. I found out 2 days ago that I am pregnant. My boyfriend is 21M and we have been dating a little shy of a year. We are both seniors in college - both attending a very well-know, prestigious university. We are both very ambitious and have lots of career plans and goals. We've talked about having a future together and I feel good and secure within the relationship, but having a child at this time in our lives was NOT in the cards.
My boyfriend says he wants me to terminate the pregnancy immediately. I thought that at first, too, but over the past 2 days, I've become really emotional and unsure of what to do.
I would like to ask my mom for advice. I haven't told anyone about the pregnancy besides my boyfriend and my doctor. Problem is, I'm not sure if telling her will do more harm or good. I really have NO idea what she will advise that I do. She is smart and cares for me a lot, and I think her input would be helpful moving forward.
Cons:
* She will be very disappointed and think less of me
* She is already EXTREMELY stressed out with other family things going on and I'm afraid this will be too much of a burden on her
* I am not sure of her stance on abortion. She is somewhat religious (I am not)
* I am scared that if I tell her I'm pregnant and don't do what she recommends, it will irreparably damage our relationship. What if she is really against abortion and I still decide I want to terminate?
Pros:
* I can get her advice and perspective to guide me in my decision
* Emotional support
* If she is ok with the abortion, she will help me pay for it. Right now, I'm looking at around $600. I can afford to pay this on my own, but it will place a huge financial burden on me.
TL;DR: | Unexpectedly pregnant and unsure of what to do. Want to tell my mom for advice, support, and possibly financial assistance, but it might cause more harm than good. Should I talk to her or deal with this by myself? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm (20f) at the end of my sexual comfort zone, will BF (21m) get bored?
POST: BF and I have been together 2.5 years and lost our virginities to each other 3 weeks ago. We've tried PiV three times. I don't really like it, but I'm happy to do it for his sake, as he does things for me (oral, fingering) that don't benefit him.
My question is, now that we've made our way around the 'bases', there's nothing left that both of us are comfortable with. We've finished experimenting and now have a routine. I'm okay with it, but will BF be? He hasn't said anything yet, but he does have a lower drive so I'm wondering if it'll get lower as this routine gets older. We're looking forward to a long term relationship, hopefully marriage. Is sexual boredom something I should be concerned about? If so, is there something I can do besides going beyond my physical boundaries?
TL;DR: | BF and I have gone around the bases, nothing left to do. Will he get bored of the routine? What can I do that doesn't compromise my boundaries? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: There is a kid who is a junior, like me, in my highschool who wants to fight me with his 18 year old friend.
POST: There is a kid in my highschool and two years ago I told his girlfriend that he was cheating on her because one of my friends was really sad that she was dating that asshole and they weren't friends anymore.
They broke up but eventually got back together and it seemed like nothing changed. I only talked to her that one time and I never talked to him. two years later he comes up to me, asks me my name, and starts talking shit and saying he's gonna beat the shit out of me with this other guy (18 year old highschool drop out) I never talked to but is dating my ex-girlfriend. I have no beef with that other guy and I have no idea why this guy is freaking out over something two years ago when it doesn't affect him at all right now. I can't negotiate with this guy because he is basically a terrorist and everytime I see him in the halls I try to say I didn't do anything but he just starts talking shit and there is no point.
I thought things had blown over besides the whole calling me a bitch every time he passes me in the hall. Today a couple different people I know says he's gonna beat the shit out of me after school today with his friend. I didn't want to deal with it so I just walked home. What the fuck should I do? Try to fight these crazy assholes? If I tell someone they'll just find me Outside of school and fucking stab me or some shit. I accept hilariously funny answers that don't help me in anyway as well.
TL;DR: | There's some asshole kid who wants to kill me because of something I did 2 years ago. Leave me advice or a joke to make me feel better please. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Housing situations with girlfriend
POST: Hey all, just looking for some insight. Girlfriend is moving in with me soon. I currently live at a place that is co-owned by my parents and I. My parents do not live with me; let alone the same state. It was just the smarter move to get the house and it will eventually (six or seven years) become my parent's retirement home. I don't plan to be living here when that time comes either.
The girlfriend is fine with the living situation, but would want to move into an apartment down the road (not literally). Is it odd of me that I would rather wait and save up more funds and move into a house of our own rather than step down from a house to an apartment? I have nothing against apartments in general, but it would be just us living here outside of the times my family visit us (which would happen regardless of where we live).
Thoughts?
TL;DR: | Girlfriend wants an apartment together sometime soon when we will already be living in a house that is co-owned with me, but not occupied by parents. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [25 M] with my GF [24 F] for 3 months, want to get back together with her abusive ex
POST: I met this very religious girl in my old office. She is a smart and gorgeous girl, unfortunately that she is too skinny and doesn't look joyful at all. So, she wasn't my type. She complained about her BF who beginning to abuse her verbally out of neediness and jealousness to me and my friend. I and my friends knew that this is the beginning of an abusive relationship. Their relationship deteriorates to the point that she got slapped and broke up. I knew that he would beg her for another chance and begin another cycle of their abusive relationship again and again.
I have a bad habit of taking other people (male, female, beauty, ugly) issues as my own. So, I tried to give her support during her depression period and show her how bad her previous relationship was. She revealed to me about her abusive father who kept spying Facebook of everyone in the family. I took pity of her and developed feeling for her in the process. We dated each other about a month later (In my defense, I'm not the kind of "NICE GUY" who use kindness to get sex).
Her ex kept harassing her from times to times during this 3 months period over the text, but she never blocked him. She didn't want me to do anything just to be safe and tried to hide this from everyone at her church.
For the past week, both of them began to talk with each other again. She told me that she talked with him as a friend and didn't want him to do anything crazy. Until this weekend, when he saw us together and began to treat her over texts then blocked her before she could text anything back. She was really scared of him and decided to stay at a hotel instead of her apartment for the week. We planned to find her a new apartment just to flee from him on the next weekend (We can't move in together because her new office is really far away from my home).
Last night, I tried to comfort her. We talked for a while. In the end, she broke down and confessed to me that she can't live without her ex. She rather gets beaten than living without him.
TL;DR: | I met a religious and gorgeous girl with daddy issue and an abusive ex. I tried to help her and end up dated her. Now, she wants her ex back. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Met a girl online
POST: So I met this girl online a couple weeks ago and we've been talking back and fourth since. She's really pretty, shes 21 and she's Swedish. Im 20 and live in the US. The moment I saw he I knew I wanted to talk to her. Nothing really happened until today. She left a group chat that we were in and I was trying to tell her that it was good that they left, and they only talked to her since she was the only female. I asked her if she wanted to talk about anything and she said Death. I was weirder out but went along with it and she said she tried to kill herself. I tried to comfort her and it worked. Kinda. I asked her if she liked birthdays and she said she didn't. She said she spends all of her holidays alone and Cry's every holiday. I tried to say I could help her if something happened and maybe I pushed a bit to far. I kept asking her to message me when something happened and she said she didn't want my help. She is now just reading my messages and not replying. I really want to make things right with her and maybe continue to talk. Any ideas?
TL;DR: | I met a girl online and talked to her about some stuff, tried to help, doesn't want my help, and won't reply to me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Confused about how I [23f] feel about my 7 month LDR with my boyfriend [25m]
POST: I feel like I probably sound like a horrible person by posting this. My boyfriend and I have been in a LDR for approximately 7 months or so, and recently, I've developed feelings for someone else who lives much closer. We had a bit of trouble when he found out about my crush, but he wants to give it another chance and try to make it work. I should be happy about that.
I feel so disconnected lately though. Before I started getting feelings for this other man, I felt so dependent on my boyfriend. I would get upset if we didn't talk for an extended period of time and I would get jealous easily. Now that he found out about it, it almost seems as if the roles have completely reversed. He wants to talk to me all of the time, and I don't really feel like I have anything to say. I love him and care for him greatly, but I don't know why I'm feeling so off about the relationship lately.
Last night, I started texting the man I have a crush on and I realized that I was flirting with him without even trying to. When I noticed, I quit responding to him immediately, because I don't want to be *that* girl.
I'd absolutely never leave my boyfriend to be with someone else - I don't even know if this man is single or not! It just feels wrong that I can have a crush if I care so much about someone else.
Have I let my relationship drag too far? I feel like I may have fallen "out of love" with my boyfriend and I'm only noticing now that I'm starting to fall for someone else. I don't know if this is the case. Is it common for this to happen?
TL;DR: | Starting to develop feelings for someone else while in a LDR and I don't know what to do regarding the situation. :( |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [16 M] 2 years later, and I can't stop thinking of this girl [16 F] - I'm depressing myself and wasting a lot of time.
POST: First of all, I'm going to post this in hopes of seeing a solution or perhaps a point you want to make me realize. I want to ask readers to nicely refrain from posting comments like 'get over it' because it's easier said than done.
So this beautiful, gorgeous girl comes as a new student in my school. [2 years ago] - I wanted to approach this girl because she was honestly perfect. You name it, she was not the type of girl that would show cleavage or take pics of her ass to impress other people, she was mature, smart, and had almost similar interests of mine. I did not have the courage to approach her, I felt like I was too 'out of her league' to approach her and thought she would feel like I was creepy and awkward. I witnessed other guys talk to her daily, and honestly deep down, my blood boiled because of it, but I kept my feelings to myself. (Note: she left the school a year later.)
Basically, the past two years have been thoughts of me being inadequate, and other things just constantly flowed through my mind, this has put me in spiralling depression through the last 2 years. To understand the extent of how much I think about her, I lost 30 lb because of her, and she doesn't even know I exist. I'm honestly wasting too much time and putting myself into a bad mood constantly because of her, I need help.
TL;DR: | I constantly think about this girl and I want to know how I can get over it [read full post, it's not long, and will give you a better idea] |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My(18F) SO(19M) lives in other state and is putting WoW ahead of our relationship, advice?
POST: My 19 year old boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years, last year his family moved about 700 miles away because his dad got a promotion, which put enough strain on our relationship as it is but he also is heavily involved in World of Warcraft.
We are fortunate to see each other once or twice a month so being in an ldr hasn't changed our relationship too much as we expected to be apart when he went to college.
His WoW playing is another story... He plays until 3am 4 nights a week and subsequently sleeps all day which makes it nearly impossible to talk on the phone during my only free time (before bed.)
Additionally, even when I'm visiting him (like I am now) he plays and almost entirely ignores me at night, despite my most seductive efforts.
He knows how much this bothers me, as I've brought it up to him more times than I can count and I know it's no short coming of mine as he's very attracted to me and we have a good relationship otherwise. However, I feel that it's distracting him from making progress in our relationship, school, connecting with friends in a new town, and his life in general.
So my question is, how do I stress that he needs to change with out controlling him? He's incredibly smart and talented but every aspect of his life is suffering because of, frankly, his addiction to WoW.
TL;DR: | How to I help my SO see that excessive involvement in this game is damaging his relationship, health, schooling, etc. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22M] getting back into date scene, have one question.
POST: Been lurking here for a long time and thought I could finally ask a question here.
I just graduated this past semester and am going to another school for grad school to complete my masters. I haven't made any real attempts to try to date with anyone because I was really busy with my academic work and other activities (a lot of intramural sports and visting the gym). Now that I'm going to another school I want to take another shot at it.
I've had relationships before (in high school), but if there is one thing I was pretty bad noticing, it's figuring out the difference between friendly flirts and flirts that indicated a girl was interested.
I'm a friendly guy and have pretty good conversations with other people and usually when a girl does that to me (as in physical contact) I usually think it's not the latter. Is there any way to actually distinguish the two?
TL;DR: | Haven't had much dating experience in undergrad. I want to try again in grad school, how do I tell a difference between a girl who is flirting with me because she's interested or just being friendly? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: How can I [23/f] get more comfortable with my boyfriend [22/m] being friends with his ex?
POST: My boyfriend and I have only been together for 6 months. My bf and his first girlfriend broke up in the middle of his freshman year of college (he cheated on her). Shortly after he started dating the girl he cheated with. Shortly after THAT he cheated on Girl 2 with Girl 1. They decided they no longer wanted to hook up and just became really close friends after that. This was about 5 years ago, so I am not worried he will cheat on me, but I still find the friendship kind of weird. I support and respect the friendship completely, and I hope they stay close! I just want some advice on how I can feel more comfortable when they're hanging out. Any tips?
TL;DR: | Boyfriend of 6 months is still close friends with his ex. I personally don't believe in maintaining relationships with my exes but I respect their friendship. I just want to feel a little more comfortable when they hang out. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23F] with my boyfriend [23 M] 6 months, He said he kissed his roommates sister and is now feeling so guilty we can't make up
POST: Hey all. So I found out about this yesterday. I've been dating a guy for the past few months that I am over the moon for. He is sweet, supportive and all around wonderful which is why this came as such a shock to me.
Yesterday he confessed that he had made out with his roommates visiting sister on Friday when he was very drunk. At first I was really mad but I honestly don't think that he is worth giving up on. However he's been panicking and says that he doesn't know if he could let our relationship continue because he says he's not worth it now and all.
What do I do reddit? I really don't want him to freak out like this because I really do love him and want to be with him.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend made out with his roommates sister while drunk. Now so upset that he thinks he's not worthy of dating. How do I convince him I still care? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by flipping off an angry motorist
POST: Living in New York (Long Island), one knows how to drive in large amounts of traffic as well as road rage. I myself don't rage but know that other motorists get off on that shit. So I'm waiting to make a left, and the light was green but I just got my license a month ago and I didn't want to take my chances, so I waited for the green arrow. The guy behind me had other plans, and made it perfectly clear that he wanted me to turn. So I make my left at the green arrow, and come up to a light turning yellow. I make it, Mr. Fuckface behind me didn't, so I flipped him off. Instantly regretting my decision, I made a quick right in an attempt to lose him. He found me and kept following me all around the back roads. Eventually I pulled out my phone and out of fear called 911. He saw me on my phone and decided to split, so I told the operator I was okay. I pull into the parking lot 3 minutes away from where I was chased around, and I see him speeding past the parking lot, but he just left. Still shaking from adrenaline.
TL;DR: | Don't flip people off in New York. You'll get chased by a crazy dude who may or may not to stab you. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: My girlfriend 20/F and I 20/M are in a weird place right now
POST: So today I wake up and my girlfriend texts me telling me we need to talk. I go over to her place right away because I hate just sitting on things like that. We've been together 4 years now and we started in high school and are in college together now. We've had our ups and downs but things have been mostly good but today she tells me that she isn't happy anymore and that things have gotten too monotonous for her. She's is a very demanding major and I don't get to see her much and when I do it's for short periods of time so we usually can't do too much.
We both knew going into this year that it wouldn't be easy. But we've made it work this far. I was a bit caught off guard today though. We're supposed to live together next year and she tells me that makes her feel trapped. Trapped in a leasing agreement and trapped with me. She's scared that if we break up that she'd be stuck there. To me that's a very legitimate concern, I'm worried about the same thing. But I want to try to make it work because I know that if we don't live together things will end up how they are now, where I'm barely able to see her and when I can it's for short periods of time. If we live together then I figure I'd see her much more than I would if we were apart. I think I got too comfortable with the relationship and that's why she feels it's too monotonous. Has anyone else been in a situation similar to mine? Thanks for the help.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend is afraid to move in next year and things have been rocky lately, I don't know what to do next |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How do I[16M] talk to a crush[16F] that I don't already know?
POST: I'm currently in high school. I've had a couple relationships(Upwards of ~8 months each) in the past, but I've never made that 'first connection' in any of them.
All the girls I've dated so far, I've known from classes, sports, or similar activities; starting that initial conversation hasn't been a problem in the past. Also, I've never been the one to start crushing on someone else. For example, in my most recent relationship, my (ex)girlfriend first confronted me about her taking interest in me, that relationship lasted 9 months.
I now find myself with a problem; I've been single for a while and now there's a girl I have a crush on(These thoughts have been going on for just over a month) and would like to get to know better, however, we share no classes or extra activities. I frequently see her in the halls and occasionally when she's walking home after school with her friends. My school is bilingual(French Immersion/English), with her in the English side and me in the French, so I don't have high hopes for having most of my future classes with her. I think she's really pretty and I really want to get to know her better, I just don't know how, where, or when to start.
TL;DR: | Have never begun initial conversations with girls I fancy and don't already know. Interested in a girl I have no current connections with. Don't know how/when to strike up conversation. |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: EE Bonds, is it a mistake to buy more?
POST: I've been analyzing my weaknesses with money and was trying to think of a good savings strategy I can stick to.
I'm 33 and do not work for an employer with 401(k), so I've been thinking about a Roth IRA, but I also just want to save in general.
My father bought me about 20 EE bonds when I was kid for future stuff (school, etc.) that are all just about now hitting maturity.
I never spent these or cashed them and it made me think, should I buy more of these and let them mature? I realize they don't accrue much value, but they also don't get spent by me, either.
Is there something else I should look into?
TL;DR: | I'm not able to save money in a bank account without spending it eventually, and I'm not a savvy stock investor. I basically want to "hide" money from myself, what's the best method? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: She [24/f] sent me [25/m] one text that is upsetting me. And it's not bad. What?
POST: We've been talking for a few months now, met once in person a few months ago and kept in touch since she's moving here soon.
Sunday, she wished me a fun business trip and told me to tell her the highlights.
Tuesday, I call, she texts me she's busy but will call me later. Didn't hear.
Wednesday, she messages me saying she still owes me a phone call. I tell her I'm getting drinks with a colleague, so Thursday I'd be free. She said that depending on traffic as she drives to a neighboring city she may call. I believe she goes there for work and also takes dance classes.
Thursday I didn't hear from her so I sent her a text, "Hey! We just won, come celebrate with us! Have fun in <city>, too." All she said back was "Lol :)"
Now I don't know who has the ball in whose court, what should be said next, when, etc. And yes, I'm fairly confident she's attracted to me.
TL;DR: | Over distance, girl I'm talking to replied "Lol :)" to a text I sent her saying she should come celebrate with us. Makes me overanalyze it and don't knwo what to do orsay. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [27 M] met this girl [27 F] on Match, just had 1st date and need a little advice on how to proceed
POST: I met this girl on match about 2 weeks ago and we immediately clicked. We had to wait until this past weekend to meet up for a date, but we were both super excited for it.
Saturday comes, and the date goes well. We met up for drinks and dinner is a very nice part of my city. We connected, laughed, talked about all the normal first date stuff and more, and I felt good by the end of the night. And from what I could read from her, she felt the same way.
The next day I get a text from her saying she didn't feel the same connection she thought she would, and I responded saying I was very sorry to hear that and wished her the best of luck. As the day went on it just kept bothering me, so I sent her another text that night, just to kindly ask where she felt our connection fell short. I made sure to approach this delicately, but I just had to know.
Last night she responded, and she said the date was great and everything went well, but that she had been building a connection with someone else and her gut told her to focus on that. She said she had feelings for me, but just had to focus on the other connection. I understand what she means, and I told her that, and wished her luck with everything. I also made sure to tell her keep me in mind should things change, because I'd love to take her out again.
Should I have been more aggressive with this? I don't want to push too hard, but I want her to know how strongly I feel about this. I really like her and I am confident things would be great between us. I'm just hoping that line "if you really want something, let it go. If it comes back it is meant to be" comes true.
TL;DR: | Met a girl on match, went out on a great date. She wants to focus on another relationship despite the good date. I responded nicely, but I want to get my side and feelings across without being too pushy. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I (18) stay with my (18) girlfriend? Details inside.
POST: **Details:**
*Pros;*
Together for two years.
We both care for each other very much.
She is an amazing person.
When she is happy we are amazing together
I understand her in every sense.
*Cons;*
She is almost always depressed. I can't spend one day with her without getting very depressed over something. Its aggravating.
She's the most dependent person I've ever met. Want her to make a decision? Nope you better make it for her.
Her parents are nuts. Not going into details, so just know they're nuts.
She turned down a VERY large scholarship to a school to take time off school. I'm staying local for college, so she is going to be with me for another year.
**Other thoughts**
I have heard too many stories of couples being destroyed because one person is ALWAYS miserable. This is going to be her and I. Which is depressing seeing how much I like her.
I feel like it would be bad to break up with her considering I'm going to see her for the next one or two years. That seems kind of selfish, I know. I want to stay with her, but I know she will drag me down with her.
What should I do reddit?
TL;DR: | GF is miserable all of the time and is too dependent on people to make decisions for her. I don't know if I want to stay with her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: So my girlfriend took a trip to Vegas...
POST: My girlfriend and I are both 21 and have been dating for a little over a year now. And let me begin by saying that NO she did not cheat on me nor do I suspect her of cheating/fooling around with someone else in the slightest. Now, she does, however, like to party. This does not bug me. However, she sent me a photo that was taken of her with two male (homosexual) strippers, which she thought was funny.
Now, in the photo, she had her legs wrapped around one stripper, and the other stripper holding her from behind. The second stripper was also cupping her breasts.
She feels as if this was clean, innocent, fun. I think otherwise. I did not get mad at her, but I did express minor dismay with her actions, to which she responded that I was being a jealous asshole. Since she was out with her friends and I was not interested in ruining her night by arguing over something where I did not fully understand the context, I more or less caved in on the argument. Last we texted, we were on completely good terms.
My question is, when she returns, how should I tackle this situation once she gets back? I want to convey to her that seeing such a picture greatly startled and upset me, but do not want to seem like I'm jealous or controlling. I don't mind if she talks to other dudes or hugs them or whatever, but seeing this picture really irritated me, regardless of the context.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend posed for in a photo with two male strippers in which she had her legs wrapped around one and the other was groping her tits. I'm mad, she thinks I'm controlling. What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What Can we do for "free" entertainment for a 18th birthday Disney Party?
POST: Hi everyone!
So it will be my female friends 18th in February and it is a Disney fancy dress. The party is at a hired venue that will take place from 19:00-Midnight. There will be a mix of adults, a lot of 18 year old's but plenty more 17 year old's. Meaning alcohol will only be reserved for the over 18's.
Now the problem we have right now is consistent entertainment. 160 people have been invited. We have the music accounted for however we are struggling for ideas to keep people interested and to generally "break the ice".
We have a "best dressed male and female" award (and prize) but other than that we are stuck for idea's. The idea of party games has been raised but we think the major problems are either people being to "mature" to participate (plus the amount of guests) or being too drunk to take part? Sp what could we do?
Oh, and i'm going as the original black and white Mickey Mouse!
TL;DR: | 18th disney party, what can we do to keep people interested throughout the night(competitions, games etc). |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My girlfriend [23F] of 2ish years flip flops between being very physically interested in me [25M] and not being interested.
POST: My girlfriend and I have been dating for a bit over 2 years and we have lived together for about a year. In general things are very good: we get along, have fun together, rarely argue and resolve disputes well.
However, the one major issue that we have is that I'm a very physical person; I like lots of kissing, cuddling, sexing etc. My girlfriend, on the other hand, alternates how physical she likes to be quite a bit. Some weeks she feels the same as me, but then will go for chunks of time where she just doesn't want to be touched at all.
We've talked about this and she says she is attracted to me and that it's not personal, but has to do with the mood she is in at the time. She (admittedly) is a pretty moody person. So, these times where she doesn't want physical contact can be pretty frustrating for both of us because I want to touch her or initiate sex, and she just wants to be left alone. She has tried to be more affectionate during those moody times, but when she does she ends up feeling resentful. This is especially frustrating for me.
We are not sure how to solve this issue. My feelings are hurt and I often feel frustrated. Obviously, we are very happy in other areas and breaking up is not something we are considering. Any advice on how to overcome this disconnect in the amount of physicality in our relationship would be helpful.
TL;DR: | girlfriend goes through moody periods where she doesn't want to be touched and it is frustrating for me as a very physical/affectionate person. What to do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [16/M]Like my best friend[16/F], told her I don't like her.
POST: I'm a guy, sixteen years old. Basically, I've liked my best friend for three years, but never had the courage to tell her. I don't know exactly why but I guess it was because I didn't want to harm our friendship. Besides, she's been in a couple of relationships during this time. She just broke up with one of my good friends after more than a year recently. I really like her but rarely express my feelings. Maybe, its because I don't want her to know I like her. The only reason I look forward to school is because I might get to see her, though that doesn't always happen because we aren't in the same class.
But we are both very fond of each other. She often tells her friends how awesome I am. Another reason why I was careful not to let her know was because I was quite under confident. I've never been in a relationship and don't consider myself attractive. I'm really short(but as tall as her) and thin as well.
On more than one occasion, I've told her that I don't like her. But I regret that. I just can't stop thinking about her. And maybe its too much, but I often dream about her as well. So...what should I do? Should I just be friends with her and not tell her? Should I tell her I like her? Anything else?
TL;DR: | I'm a 16 year old guy. Liked my best friend for a long time. Told her I didn't like her. What do you think I should do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [F20] feel bad about missing my sister's [F10] birthday
POST: I [F20] grew up with an abusive, asshole dad. Which wasn't great, but hey, I got myself out of it about 8 years ago and I'm fine with that. But in leaving him behind, I also left behind my two half sisters, L [F10] and S [F7].
Supposedly my father and stepmother treat them well, and I'm glad because I would hate for them to be put through what my father and stepmother did to me. But L's birthday just marks another year I've missed out on being a big sister. S's birthday was in December, and was a little less difficult because I had never even met S.
I know that as long as I have no contact with my father and stepmother, I will also have no contact with L and S.
I guess my question is, how do I just continue to deal with this? I feel so much guilt about not knowing L and S and not being the best big sister to them.
TL;DR: | No relationship with father and stepmother. It's my little sister's birthday. I feel guilty. I just want to feel better. |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: [20M] Difficulties with having serious conversations with girls
POST: I've always had a problem with talking sincerely to girls about how I feel about them or where a relationship might be going. It's much easier in my opinion to let them take the lead, but in the past I reckon my lack of decisive action has killed the relationship. I'll put it down to the insecurity of being rejected and not having the guts to overcome it.
At the moment, I'm chatting to this girl a few years ahead of me at university and I'm having the same problem. We've met for a couple of coffees and then had some drunken messing about after some nights out over the last 5-6 weeks. We get on great together but I haven't picked up anything major from her that would suggest that she's interested or not. Because of her timetable and extra curricular activities it's incredibly difficult to find a time to see her (I know this through good friends in her year who have confirmed how busy her schedule is). I want to ask her if there's anything long term in this or if she's not that interested and just wants some casual fun. I was considering asking one of her closest friends about the subject. Would that be a good idea or would it look bad on my part for being so indirect if she found out?
On the one hand, by having the "where is this going" conversation, I let her know that I think we have some semblance of a relationship (and I'm not sure she's up for that). On the other hand, if I wait then I might lose her.
How would you feel if a guy that you thought were only seeing casually turned around and said something that made it sound like he thought you were on the way to a relationship? I feel that that I knew if she was interested or not then it might make it easier to cope with her not being free very often. Thanks for the help!
TL;DR: | Not sure if a girl I'm seeing is in the same mindset as I am but I don't know if it's too early to ask. |
SUBREDDIT: r/travel
TITLE: Convince me and/or give me advice - I have a week in November to travel and I'm conflicted between places.
POST: I'm currently in the south of Switzerland, and I'll have a free week to travel in November (the 12-17, though I can also leave late the 11 and come back early the 18).
I was thinking about doing a long trip in one place, or trying to do multiple places and giving only two or three days to each place.
On one hand, I really, really want to see Lisbon, and I could see myself staying there for the week.
I also would really like to see more of Central/Eastern Europe - I was in Budapest before the semester, and would love to hit up Prague. One of my potential ideas was Prague -> Germany/Austria -> back home, or Prague -> Copenhagen -> back home.
TL;DR: | Short or long travel, and places? I usually travel fairly slowly, so I think that I might stick with the one city idea, but I'm torn between having to choose between Western and Eastern Europe. Thoughts or recommendations? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Am I too nerdy for a real relationship?
POST: I'm deathly afraid of talking to people, afraid of being socially awkward and/or creepy. I had an LDR with approximately monthly visits (she was only ~150 miles away) for over a year and then she broke up with me.
I've been single and lonely ever since because I just have trouble meeting new people and getting to the point where we talk more beyond the fleeting first conversation.
I'm also afraid of boring them out with my hobbies and interests. Everyone suggests talking about current events/politics...that is the thing I am fairly nerdy about. I literally read 4 or 5 news sources over the course of an average day and know what's going on. I even blog about it.
Music doesn't work for me either because a) I'm a fan of classical music, and b) if anything we start talking about is at all harmonic I get nerdy about it.
I ended up doing a Roman-numeral analysis of Bad Romance in my head at last year's Valentine's Day dance because I was bored being the only single person there. 'Nuff said.
TL;DR: | I'm afraid of making one bad move and creeping everyone out or being seen as too awkward, and I'm worried I'm too nerdy for a real relationship. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: I dont know if I can work here any longer my co-worker is the worst.
POST: Warning im on my phone so expect grammar and spelling errors as well as bad formatting.
First things first im a 24 year old male working at a large name brand shipping and receiving depo as a security gaurd on the grave yard shift 9:30pm to 5:30 am. I was originally on the 1:30 pm to 9:30 shift untill a month ago. This is where the problems start. I normally work with annoying, lazy but tolerable people but this new late night shift has me working with scum.
The coworker i now work with is around 70 years old and is a massive racist. Alot of the truckers that come into this depo to deliver goods often are foreign and cant speak English well. This annoys and angers my co worker. He often complains to me about them and uses offensive language and slurs. Saying stuff such as how they are ruining the country and other racist remarks. He even yells at them when he gets mad. As if that wasn't bad enough he is a chain smoker and smokes at least a pack or two in his 8 hour shift causing the tiny gaurd shack we share to reak. Standing next to him is like standing next to a ashtray full of lit cigarettes. He also is constantly messing with his private parts and to make matters worse when he goes to the bathroom he never washes his hands. this is especially disgusting because he touches stuff others touch like gate switches, doors, and computers . He is constantly coughing like wet and mucus sounding and he never covers his mouth. He also likes to yell at me and tell me how im rushing things or not paying attention when I forget to highlight a checkin slip that can easily be done any time throughout the night. Then he will fall asleep and miss stuff or mark stuff wrong and ill have to correct him. He is just the worst. I don't know what to do im the new guy only been here for 3 months he has 5 years under his belt who are they going to believe? How do I talk to a person like this and what if he gets angry and makes this job even more of a living hell? I just needed to tell someone.
TL;DR: | coworker is a disgusting private touching, no hands washing, racist asshole who is making my life hell and im the new guy stuck at this crap job. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [20F] can't say my boyfriend's name after 2 years...
POST: *
TL;DR: | How can I say my boyfriend's name naturally without panicking like crazy and wanting to cry? Also his name is the easiest and shortest name ever |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [28F] husband [28M] is freaked out at the prospect of having kids
POST: I'm a 28F, my husband is a 28M. We've been together for four years and married for a year of that. I think it's time to either start trying to have a baby or at least start planning for when that's going to happen.
My husband is totally freaked out at the prospect of kids, but has also made it clear that if this something I want, I should go ahead and do it without talking about it. He's said this multiple times - that he's not ready but that if I want to, I should just get off the pill and not tell him until I'm pregnant. He seems to be more concerned about the prospect of having to talk about kids than about actual kids.
I'm not comfortable with this. I want him 100% on board with this before I go off the pill, and I think there are some major discussions we need to have before we're ready. Springing a pregnancy on an unwilling husband seems like a horrible thing to do. On the other hand, it's not exactly springing it on him if he's requested this.
Are my instincts on this wrong? Is my desire to have him 100% committed to this before going ahead asking too much? I've heard that some men aren't that into the idea of babies until their baby appears, but having a kid with someone who kinda doesn't want to and dislikes talking about seems like a bad life plan. I don't think that if I wait a couple of years, my husband is going to just naturally get less freaked out by this, since his reasons for being unsure/opposed are more like "I'm not done having fun" and less "we don't have enough space yet."
TL;DR: | My husband says he's not ready for kids, but has also told me it'd be fine if I just went ahead and got off of the pill. Bad idea? Seems like it! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [23/m] An old friend from HS (22/f), should I send her a poem I wrote 5 years ago?
POST: Some background: We were good friends during Sophomore year (high school) but that fell off as she started to date a friend of mine from church (now broken up after she followed him to college, she's still there for another year). Me and her haven't talked much since HS, but when I look back, I miss how meaningful and open our conversations were. I have yet to this day had such open talks about life with anyone due to the changing nature of college (people graduating, moving away, getting married, etc.).
I saw my friend at Target at the start of the school year and started some small talk about how things were, etc. A few months later I decided to ask her to hang out - nothing serious. I asked her to hang out but nothing came of it. She said she wanted to but forgot and said she had meetings and work but would try to figure something out, but again forgot.
I'm not very good at social cues especially over fb and the like, but I do really miss talking to her and want to be at least friends again. I'm the kind of person who's afraid of making people uncomfortable and my relationships suffer for that (working on it). Is there anything I can do? I mean even if I push again, the worst she can do is say no and we never talk again which is what would happen if I did nothing, right? Just not sure how to go about it.
Below is the poem I'm tempted to send her, not a love poem but a friend poem. I did like her more than that in hs and I feel like those feelings can come back, idk. If anyone simply replies: "You've just got to let her go, there are other fish the in sea", I get that, that's true, I've just been lonely and desperate for a real friend - it's hard to never talk about more than the coolest movie out now or school (small talk which is what everyone I know is interested in).
I'm just seeing what options I have and looking for some reassurance in how to go about this.
TL;DR: | Old friend from high school, thought we had something cool going on, but we fell off after several years. What should I do? Have an old poem from 5 years ago (above). |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21 M] with my Brother's GF [21 F] of 6 years, She is a user and I don't know how to handle
POST: It started in my 2nd year of college when my older bro introduced me to his gf. She was nice, courteous and accommodating.(your typical sweetie)
The problems started a few months after they started dating. My bro started looking more tired than usual. Our neighbours also started telling us about my bro trying to borrow things/trying to get things for i.o.u.'s. gf's clothes in the laundry.
We generally tolerated that since she helped bro in his computer science course.(which is hard for bro btw)
Not more than a year later, she started coming with us on family shopping trips to chinatown. that is when it kinda escalated. she started interrupting meal times just to take selfies, groupies and food porn. she did not dare eat anything without asking us first. she only ate the meat, the fried rice and avoided vegetables unless offered.(Our family takes food seriously, so we all got offended by that culmination of behaviour)
Not long after that, she started eating breakfast, lunch or/and dinner at our house.(and if the food is good, she takes home the leftover food without considering if we ate) all the while continuing her bad behaviour.
Some time later, my cutesy things started disappearing, it started with my phone accessories, then escalated to my 1:2 scale teddy bear!(I got it back after my bro arbitrated the negotiation)
4 years(an a lot of hell from her) later, When they graduated college, the girl's parents(who we only met on that day) expected us to treat them to a celebratory feast.(we didn't oblige btw and they left bitter)
There was more to it but I wont bore you with details
TL;DR: | Girl takes advantage of my older bro. so she can start and finish college. Bro loves her, doesn't care anyway. family suffers from her shit /how do I handle her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: me 27/F with my husband, 29/M; says he "accidentally" friended his ex on FB
POST: My (27/F) husband (29/M) said he accidentally added his ex on FB. Is it even possible to accidentally friend someone in this day and age? Here's a little background...
This is a throwaway account because he would surely know this is me. I was looking at his FB page one night, and it said "recently became friends with (insert ex's name here)." I thought to myself that that's kind of messed up because I know that if the shoe was on the other foot, he would be furious. I'm not one to jump to conclusions, so I casually asked him about it, and sheepishly admitted I felt weird about it. He said "What? No, I'm not friends with her." I told him what I had seen and he paused for some time then said, "Well, I guess maybe I must have accidentally sent her a friend request." He also went on to say that that would be a super messed up thing to do on purpose and that he was sorry. I assumed that meant he would unfriend her and that would be the end of it..... he hasn't. TWO WEEKS later and he hasn't unfriended her. What do I do?
He has also been friending a few other girls that he admits he has never actually met in person, but they know friends of his.... then the explanation just kind of trails off. Again, he gets super weird when guys friend me on FB, demanding to know how I know them (coworkers, etc). Because of this, I tend not to add male friends and avoid situations that would cause him discomfort. I also don't like the idea of inviting temptation by adding an ex.
The more I've thought about the situation, the more messed up it seems. Even if you accidentally add someone, you get a notification when they accept your request, so he would have HAD to have known.
What do you all think? Should I be worried? Do you think it is possible to accidentally friend someone on Facebook? Help please!
TL;DR: | My [27/F] husband [29/m] claims he "accidentally" added his ex on Facebook. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: 19M with my ex [18F], "Accidental" Sexting?
POST: Hi there, 19M here, and I need your opinion on something! A couple nights ago, my ex-girlfriend sent me a text message saying, "You know what I miss right now? Your huge dick," followed very quickly by "Oh no shit! That wasn't meant for you!!!" So, my question is, is it plausible that she did in fact send that completely on accident?
Some context: we've been broken up for almost a year, but we rekindled our friendship a few months ago and have talked steadily since. A few nights before this we were in a fight about past relationship issues, and she seemed pretty aggravated by it, and I was hurt too, so I sent her a message saying that we should say goodbye for good, because our friendship was turning into a not-good thing. She didn't respond to it, until later that night when she accidentally sent me the sext, and hasn't responded since. I'll fully admit that I'm insecure enough to read very heavily into this, and was just looking for an outside perspective into this, preferably even female. Thanks so much!
TL;DR: | Ex sexted me then immediately said it was meant for someone else after we had a small fight, and I don't know if it was really an accident or something to get me riled. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Steven King, Greedo and my troll of a dad...can reddit help me find an interview/passage involving Steven King finding a Greedo figure?
POST: One of my earliest childhood memories is of a BeeGee's store in Maryland that I visited right before a family trip into new england and up to Canada. I got to pick out one toy, so I picked out a Greedo figure and on the trip I lost it on top of a mountain in Maine. Apparently I cried for the entire time we were in Maine. My dad never let me go sniveling as a child without saying "Oh what, is little baby going to cry like when he lost his greedo on (insert mountain name here)" For years and years, up until I showed him this excerpt that I read one day...
I was an avid reader as a kid and Stephen King was one of my favorite fiction writers at the time. I would rip through those books. I stopped dead in my tracks when I read that Stephen King found a Greedo figure on a mountain in Maine and that was featured in Cujo (one of the few books I never read) and carried around with him on the set of Creepshow. This was back in the pre-internet days, so I just chalked it up to one of those things I would never be able to verify or prove. Whenever I think about it, I feel like I'm lying to myself.
Made worse by the fact that I've gone over so many of the interviews he did and I can't find the quote anywhere. I'm thinking that MAYBE it was in "The Zombies that ate pittsburg", but maybe not.
Is there are Redditor that knows of this interview, where he talks about the Greedo he found? The time period is dead on, the mountain name is forever embedded in my head. My sanity will thank you!
TL;DR: | I think Stephen King found my lost childhood star wars figure and used it in a book. This does not make me cool or unique. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by leaving my headphones on when I got up to pee.
POST: So this happened about an hour and a half ago. I usually listen to music while I sleep using earbuds/headphones. I got up to go use the restroom in the hall of my apartment, since my roommate has his own attached to his bedroom. After finishing up in the bathroom and flushing, I walk out of the bathroom music still playing, but my headphone catches and I yank them out. The music stops and I realize I can hear a very feminine moan coming from my roommates room. Apparently his girlfriend came over while I was asleep and they were doing what couples do. Now I immediately scramble to plug my headphones back in and turn my music on to allow them their privacy. Turning my music on was the worst idea I had because the light from my phone seeps under the door into my roommates room. Before I can turn my music back on, the noise stops from my roommate's room and I hear a female voice say "I thought your roommate was asleep." Now I am scared of having ruined the moment for them, and I hear my roommate coming to the door and opening it. I am now face to face with my roommate phone in hand and now on camera mode because I missed the music tab and hit my camera. My roommate gives me a dirty look and closes the door on me. I am now laying in bed listening to them argue on the other side of the wall as my roommate tries to get her back into the mood and her being upset about the incident.
TL;DR: | I left my headphones in and didn't notice my roommate banging leading to me standing outside his door. Now I cockblocked him and he and his girlfriend may think I am a voyeur. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (23F) family has mixed feelings about my boyfriend (27M) and it is causing me anxiety.
POST: I took a break from my boyfriend a few months ago so that we could sort our priorities and feelings out. We are now taking a different, healthier approach to our relationship, and I have been happy and content with how things have been going.
It was difficult to explain to my family, however, that I would like to try to work on things with my boyfriend. He is very caring, understanding, and strives for the best. I truly enjoy him and spending time with him. In the eyes of my family, however, he is perhaps not the best "catch" for me, some reasons being that he hasn't gone to college, he doesn't have the best relationship with his family, and there must have been a serious reason for why we took a break in the first place. It's not that they don't like him--they perhaps just feel that I could "do better," and should have moved on.
I don't want to, though, but I'm feeling like I constantly have to live up to some expectation that they are having of me, and I'm afraid that it will have an effect on my relationship with my boyfriend.
This is difficult for me because I have a strong relationship with my family, and I know that they want the best for me. I'm also quite fond of my boyfriend, and don't want to just "give up" on the relationship because of expectations. I'm feeling a bit confused.
I would appreciate any input and advice, especially if anyone has been through something like this before.
TL;DR: | Family has mixed feelings about boyfriend because of external factors, and I am having a difficult time convincing them to trust me in my decision to be with him. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: How soon is too soon to move on after a break up? And how do I start making new friends
POST: I [26M] was in a 3+ year relationship with my ex [23F] and we broke up less than a month ago. We had a LDR for the past 2 years because she moved back with her parents in Dubai and I don't have the experience to get a job out there atm. I found out this morning that when she told me she was out with her parents and couldn't skype me, she was actually out on a date and I have a feeling she didn't go home. Is it normal for someone to move on this soon? Also, do I do the same and forget about the past 3 years and just jump back into dating? Whilst dating I lost touch with any other friends I had, so she was literally my only friend. What's the best way to gain new friendships?
TL;DR: | after a 3 years relationship, should I just forget about her and move on? And how do I go about making new friends |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My gf [20F] of 1.5 years broke up with me [21M] rather unexpectedly and we haven't discussed it. Need advice
POST: I've posted the story to this sub earlier this week and simply put she said she wasn't happy and couldn't see us being together right now. I was too shocked to process the whole thing, so I just told her I was going to walk home. We haven't discussed anything about why or what either of us is feeling/thinking.
Throughout the day I switch from crying and dramatic pleas of a miracle happening to feeling good about myself. I've tried so hard to not contact her and even thought it's only been two days it feels like months and we haven't communicated in anyway except for me returning an expensive gift. I deleted her off facebook and found out she unfollowed me on instagram, which really hurt to learn. I keep staring at my phone praying that she will text me at any moment. Should I contact her to figure out what the reasons were and get the closure to help move on or should I keep no contact and hope she eventually texts me wanting to meet up?
I know it's a bad move to contact parents in this situation, even if you're close with them, but does that same rule apply to roommates if they're mutual friends as well and other mutual friends?
TL;DR: | Gf broke up with me completely unexpectedly. Should I contact her to get the reasons and closure or maintain NC and wait and hope she wants to talk to me? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: i (23 f) am going to be maid of honor at my (23 f) best friends wedding. i want to mention her deceased father in my speech but am worried it might be insensitive.
POST: we have been best friends since we were little kids and sadly her father suddenly died when we were 12. i am the only person in her life (besides family) that knew her dad. she is heartbroken he wont be at her wedding to give her away and that he never got to know her as an adult/meet her fiance.
she is honoring him by having his picture in her bouquet and he has a seat on the top table again with his photo.
i would like to mention breifly in my speech that i knew him and that i know he would with us and how proud he would be and so on, but i am concerned that it might be a bit too much of a sensitive subject. ive never been to a wedding before, let alone been a big part of one so im really unsure.
any advice would be appreciated! thanks!
TL;DR: | my best friends father died when we were young, is it a bad idea to mention him in my maid of honor speech |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: My [m/20] first real relationship and having issues with her [f/20] ex.
POST: So this is my first real serious relationship with this girl (3 months, not too long I know but serious for me). I like her and I'm sure she really likes me but there is this one thing. She seems to keep in touch with a lot of ex boyfriends as friends. Now I've said I trust her and she's been cheated on before so I'd hope she wouldn't do the same but this one guy in particular, who apparently was in love with her, seems to be talking to her more and more. Initially he hated her because he thought she cheated on him with me (which isnt true they broke off long before). But now they are talking again. I'm not entirely sure what they are saying and she says its just about weed connections. She's done other drugs with him when they were dating and he offered her some the other night. I was really uncomfortable because I do not endorse that at all (weed is fine but coke is another thing). He sounds like a real bad person(ie. putting MDMA in her drink when she wasnt looking, but she saw that the drink looked funny so didnt take it), and she's even admitted he is a dick. My main concern is that if she hangs out with him she will either get into drugs (intentionally or unintentionally) or he may have this feeling of revenge for what he thinks she did and she may get hurt. Anyhow I'm not sure what I should do to tell her. She knows how I feel and I do trust her but, like I said it's my first real relationship and these feelings are new.
TL;DR: | Girlfriend of 3 months is talking to ex boyfriend drug dealer who she apparently hates but sometimes says he is nice. He's done some questionable things. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M] with my girlfriend [23F] dating for 6 months, going on a break
POST: So my girlfriend just asked me if we could take a break. We talked for a couple hours together and now I'm at home and don't really know what to think. We both really like (one could even use love) each other a lot, however our personal scheduals are shit. For example, I'm in school right now 5 days a week, with work on the weekends, and she works 5 days a week, with a tuesday night class and choir practice on wendsdays and saturdays. We also both work at a grocery store so our hours aren't the same each week, so it's not like we can set a day each week to be together.
Basically over the last couple months of seeing each other once a week at best, she asked if we could take a short break to focus on our own things, and then when we have more time during the summer we can get back together and start spending more time together. However I don't know if it's gonna work, which is making me kinda scared (first GF). On one hand, I completly agree that we aren't gonna be able to spend any meaningful time together as is, and we both need to focus on our own studies. However I'm scared that come spring, she won't feel the same way about me, and we won't be able to get back together.
And before you guys go off about how there are "other fish in the sea" and how I should just move on, I understand. However, I still have some really strong feelings for her, and she (at least told me) that she still has feelings for me, and I don't want to get rid of something after only 6 months if it really is something special.
TL;DR: | Girlfriend suggest going on a break so we can focus on our studies. Still have strong feelings for her and want to be able to get back together with her after the semester is over. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How many inner voices do you have? (throwaway! I really need some insight!)
POST: A family member of mine just told me the other day that she hears several inner dialogues going almost constantly and it has been going on for four years, she is 16 now. I'm a psych major and i think a fairly progressive one at that, so although I was immediately concerned that she might be displaying symptoms of schizophrenia, I talked to her about it more and I do not believe it is schizophrenia now. She says there are three total and they are all a part of her, only one is optimistic, one is pessimistic, and one is the core self or something. I have been talking to my friends about this and it turns out another friend of mind experiences this phenomena only she has several more, and to her they are have voices of people in her past but she considers them a part of her.
I am wondering, does anyone else have something like this? It seems to me like some sort of split or dissociated ego. My family member is going to be seeking therapy and my friend has been in and out of therapy for some time and has been diagnosed with ego dissociation. If anyone has any resources or insightful thoughts, I would greatly appreciate it!
TL;DR: | Family member and friend hear multiple inner voices and I am soo curious about it. Does anyone have similar experiences or information on this matter? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (19 M) girlfriend (20 F) constantly hangs out with 4 guys and not sure how to feel about it?
POST: I (19 M) have been seeing my girlfriend (20 f) for about 3 months now. And everything is going great until yesterday. I leave work early, skip food and fill up gas just to go see her that night. I'm texting her through out the day and she is saying it's her friends birthday and I tell her it's cool if I don't go.
But she insists I go and I do. As I'm on my way she says it'll be weird since she's with her friends I get pretty mad since I was almost there and she is telling me all day to go. So I go home.
Next day I see her and I see a picture of her and 4 guys. She told me it was her and her 3 girlfriends. I got pissed and was like what is this blah blah. She says its her squad who she has know since she was a child. I understand and everything but why lie about it and not want me to go?
There's a group chat of her and her bestfriend that's a girl and these 4 guys. And they constantly hang out together. Not as much As I hang out with her and she never picks them over me which is good.
But I didn't know until know she hangs out with them way more than I thought. And I'm not exactly sure how to feel about it. She posted a snapchat of her play fighting with one of the guys and I guess ever since then I've been at ease.
They constantly have movie nights and she doesn't post anything ok snapchat even though she posts 20 stories a day. I don't know if this is relevant or not just including it. It really started bothering me last night and I'm not going to make her pick between me or her friends and I don't want to be controlling but what do I do.
TL;DR: | Girlfriend hangs out with supposed childhood friends constantly and might even flirt with them. Never met them or been invited even though she does try to include me at times. Pretty bothered by it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by bullying a lady out of the seat next to me on the train
POST: Ok, so first off this happened 30 minutes ago and I just got off said train.
So to those who catch the train in Melbourne will know the seating I'm talking about. For those of you who don't know, Melbourne trains, like most have designated special needs seating. Apart from those there's very few 'good seats' these are the seats that are two seats on they're own row with no others facing you. I always pick these seats so I can have my bag next to me so I can do my make up for the next 12 hours I'm at work.
No its not selfish, before you go there. I get the train so damn early that the seats never fill up by the time I have finished my make up. When I'm finished my bag is on my lap and the seat is free again.
Today however, some lady decided that none of the other empty seats were good enough for her and she plonks down in the seat next to mine. This knocks my bag and ALL my make up on the floor of a moving train. Me being Australian, I unconsciously revert to my natural language - swearing.
Imagine something like 'Oh Fuck! Where'd that go? Oh for fuck's sake! Really? This is the best friggin' seat to pick!'
All while scrabbling around for all my things, hoping they hadn't broken. (Make up is expensive!)
The lady is clearly not impressed with me when I yank my scarf (which she was sitting on!) out from under her. And finally gets the hint she's not welcome on this particular seat and moves to sit right next to someone else down the carriage.
By this point everyone is staring and definitely giving me condemning looks.
Then I realize, my make up is only half done. I got to spend the next 15 minutes feeling like the coldest bitch as I go back to doing my make up after bullying someone out of the seat next to me.
TL;DR: | unplanned outburst bullied lady out of the seat next to me, everyone else silently judged me for rest of the trip. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I[M/21] overheard my mother[F/52] and sister[F/29] discussing cheating.
POST: Spending Christmas break at my parent's house, and my sister came over to visit last night, and stayed the night. I was walking into the kitchen this morning and hear my mom and sister talking about my sister's one night stands.
Sister was saying that she feels a little guilty, saying she loves my BiL so much, but she just can't help but have sex with a new guy every now and then. Mom told her don't feel guilty it is natural to want to be with others, just don't get emotionally involved and get caught, and no one will ever know, have a long happy marriage.
This hit me in the gut, especially since my mother went through cheating with my Dad several years back. He had a full on affair with a woman for months, it was a tumultuous time, but Mom forgave him and took him back.
Now I just see her hypocrisy. I have not been around either of them all day and have stayed in my room, because I don't want to be around them.
Is it true everyone cheats, I mean, jeeze, not giving me a whole lot of confidence about any future relationship I will have?
Should I tell my BiL and my Dad what I heard? I have no evidence other than listening to their conversation, and I wonder if it is my place to say anything, but I just feel like they should know. Especially the way my mother was so callus about it. If you truly care for someone, wouldn't there be some guilt? I know she said it is how you have a long happy marriage, but wouldn't it be almost a fake marriage?
I am just lost on what to do.
TL;DR: | Sister is cheating on BiL, Mother encouraging her, possibly cheating on Dad, unsure of if it is my place to tell Dad and BiL |
SUBREDDIT: r/pettyrevenge
TITLE: Mr. Employee don't send your nice mom after me!
POST: Long story short I manage a small office, and an assistant so I hire an employee. Well in the past when I only had one part time employee if one quit I was hurting so now I always make it a habit to hire two.
So I had to hire a guy, and I hired not the greatest of workers. Whatever I need a warm body, then comes along a new hire who is A LOT BETTER. So I cut first employees hours and increase 2nd accordingly.
The first worker protests, I tell him tough, deal with it, or buck up and show some improvement.
Then...
He brings in his mom! His mom is a nice lady...and I'm so confused why this employee is bringing in his mom to discuss his hours with me.
So his mom purposes the question "Why did you reduce my sons hours"
To which I look at her son and say "Well, would you like me to explain why?" he says yes!
I look at the mom and start on my list of issues. Then I look at the mom and say: "Now if you where in my position would you not do the same thing?" To which she agreed, they left.
TL;DR: | don't send in your mom to settle a issue between a mgr and employee...Or I will bury you in front of her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Worrying about saying my ex's name to current GF
POST: My ex (F27) and I (M26) broke up a couple years ago after seven years of dating (we were each other's first LTRs). We're friends now and completely over it; I absolutely do not love her anymore.
I now have an awesome girlfriend (F23) who I'm crazy about. Everything is perfect and I've never been happier with someone. But, I'm really worried that my autopilot will slip back into old habits and accidentally say "I love you [ex]" instead of "I love you [GF]"!
It hasn't happened, but I still worry about it a lot. It feels like something I have to consciously overcome, and I'm scared that I'll be sleepy or out of it at some point and say the wrong name.
Also, I chatted with the ex a while ago, who is also in a new relationship, and she has the same fear! Is this a common thing? How would you feel if it happened to you?
TL;DR: | I'm worried about accidentally saying my ex's name out of habit when I say "I love you" to my GF, though I have no feelings for the ex and love the GF tons! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I (22F) bang this guy (25M) or wait?
POST: So I've been talking to this guy on Tinder for a day or two ans we're meeting up at a bar near his house tonight.
I'm kind of in a weird place where I do really want a relationship but I am also DTF if I don't click with someone on a date personality-wise but I think he's cute.
But i'm conflicted if I should bang this guy or not. He's not the best texter and idk how this date is gonna go. When we text, he doesn't really ask many questions about me and I feel like the conversation is not very balanced. That could be because he's a bad texter but i'm not really feeling any sparks at the moment.
So what should I do? TMI but i'm super horny and masterbating just hasn't been cutting it lately. I want to have sex but I've been humped-and-dumped quite a bit and want to try a new approach by waiting. But I also want sex.
Then again, I dont want to miss out on sex with a hot guy if there isn't any chemistry on the date and he never hits me up after the date.
What do u suggest? See how the date goes and if i dont feel chemistry, fuck him? But then what if it's the kind of relationship where it's not instantaneous? This is all so risky lol
TL;DR: | Should I hookup on the first date if i'm not feeling any sparks and want to have sex or nah? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [23F] finally meet up with long time internet crush [26M], it goes well, but I get ignored(?)
POST: I have been sorta internet friends with this guy for years, and it was always fairly obvious that there was an attraction, but I was in a long term relationship and he lived about 5 hours away. Now, he lives an hour away and I am single.
I happened to be in his city with nothing to do so he invited me over to his apartment and I spent the night (although we did not have sex). It was the first time I met him in person but the connection I felt was incredibly intense, and I thought it was for him too. There wasn't a doubt in my mind that he was really into me.
When I left that morning, he said that he would talk to me later and that we should definitely see each other soon, and there was a pretty emotional goodbye. Later that day I realized I left something at his apartment so I texted him and asked him to hold onto it until the next time I see him, he confirms that he has the thing but does not respond to the rest of the message.
Two days later, I text him to ask him a question, he responded, but when I suggested that we hang out this weekend I didn't get a response and I have not heard from him since; it's been two days.
Meanwhile, he's been liking my photos of me on Instagram and has obviously been reading my blog, and while I try not to take these things too seriously, I'm slightly confused. Is he trying to avoid me but failing, is he still interested but being weird about it, or does he just want to continue an online friendship? I also have a tendency to fall too hard too quickly, so am I just taking this all way too seriously? It frankly seems a little ballsy to continue to interact with me online when he's been ignoring my text messages. Either way I want my stuff back!
TL;DR: | Meet longtime internet crush for the first time, have a great time, he ignores my text messages but not my internet presence. What's the deal? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Children of Unemployed Parents, how did you deal with your parents when you had to move out?
POST: Hi Reddit, my girlfriend is currently going through a pretty tough time. She is going to college as well as working full time to support herself and her mother. She hasn't talked to her dad in a very long time and I don't think she would want to or even knows how to find him. She wants to get a place for herself but she can't bring herself to just leave her mom. Her mom refuses to get a job no matter what, even under the threat of having to live alone. She's talked to me about this a few times, and I have no advice for her and we haven't been together long enough for me to be in a position to help her and her mom financially. I was just hoping to hear some stories to see if anything you say helps, or any advice on what she can do is appreciated to.
TL;DR: | gf lives alone with mom, mom won't/refuses to work, gf can't move out and also can't stand supporting her mom. Don't know what do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23 M] asked my crush [22 F] out several months ago. She said no, however she keeps trying to hang out.
POST: She is now dating a guy. Still I get multiple texts a week asking to hang out from her. I'm not interested in just being friends with her, and have been avoiding her for a couple weeks. Today she asked if I wanted to get a beer and I replied no, to which she replied "have I done something wrong?"
and then subsequently sent "wtf?"
I simply replied that I was at work. It hurts when I'm in her presence, but the way she is replying seems like I've hurt her... Yet, I don't think she knows how much she meant to me and how much it hurt when she said no. What do I do? I must say that this whole thing is taking its toll on me. I've been mentally exhausted for weeks now because all I can think about is her.
TL;DR: | I don't want to be just friends with her, she said no, I've been trying to avoid her, and she keeps asking to hang out. |
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