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1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Well Kids. Tonight is the big show. Actually, it's not really big. There's only four bands, Planet Smashers, Catch 22, Mustard Plug and Big D and the kids table. That's not that many. I miss Warped Tour. I'm taking the guys up..too bad I don't think I'm taking god up. That would rock rock rock. If god graces me with his presence tonight, I'll be a happy girl. I'll also be a happy girl if I meet some new boys. That's right. Another song you kids need is 'Long Goodnight,' by the get up kids, and 'I belive in a thing called love,' by the darkness. Those are pretty nifty selections. I actually wanted to catch some sleep before we hit the road, but I don't know if I'll be able too. Ugh. This will be interesting. Esecially because I have a high hate-tred, for ska. Yes, I know. That makes no sense, and why am I going right? Well, put it too you this way, it's a show, and It's in Cleveland, only $10 and I'm going with the guys. I've never been to a show with them. This will be fun! .. I think .. If I don't die in the pit first. I'm going to go, if anyone wants to come along tonight, your more than welcome. Just bring some powerade and all will be fine. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | This sucks, and like everything else in life, it is going to turn out bad. Because, I'm sorry to break it to you folks, luck just doesn't happen. Luck is man made. Luck is won over and bought just like everything else in this world. I hate what society has done to society. If you watch movies from era's like the 50's, 60's and such, they all look so comfortable. Comfortable with their friends, homes, and everything that was going on around them. Why can't it be like that now? If anyone can answer that for me, I'll owe it too you, because nothing good ever happens to me. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | I'm just plain tired kids. I've got no more motivation, no energy, and no expectations. If this isn't the low life, I don't know what is. I could really care less about writing in here today, but there's nothing else too do. I might see if the guys want to help me film. I don't know. Today isn't a good day. I need someone to come over. . .If anyone would like to save me, I will love you forever. I think. </3 |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Hey folks. This is a special entry, cuz Im writing from my Aunt Kathy's house. Yesterday was so long and boring I don't even know where to start. I ended up waking up at like 6:30 yesterday, and went to track at like 10. The meet was at Mineral Ridge. We were there until seven freaking oh clock. Not to mention I also look like a freak, since harry injured my eye with the fake sword, and I got so sunburnt that I hurt. I really need to do some filming. I only have three days left to get my video done. Now, I really feel like a director. Seriously. I want to watch the first season of Red vs. Blue. But. I've been so freaking busy it's not even funny. I can't belive school is almost over. We only have like less than two months left. To me, that's both sad and great at the same time. I definitly cannot wait until I graduate. That way I can leave and move to New York City. If anyone else would like to tag along with me let me know. I honestly dont know if I want to go to California. I mean, I do. I think it would be really fun. But I dont know. I know that I need to be alone and on my own for a while. I don't see where that would differ from now. I mean, I'm honestly like never home anymore. I'm usually always either, at School, Track, or I'm at Harry's. And usually if I am at home, the guys always end up stopping over or something. My mom thinks that its odd that I only have a few friends that are girls. I don't know why I don't. I mean, yeah, there nice to talk to and all, but I barley have anything in common with any of them. The only girls Im really friends with are Rachel and Sarah. Well, there are others, but I don't ever talk to them or hang out with them outside of school. I wonder why they took off the show, where in the world is Carmen San Diego? I don't get that. I get to have pop now. But really, I don't want it. I just don't. It tastes really funny and I don't feel to good after it. You all need to go listen to Muse. I love this band. There really awesome. I mean so awesomerific that I can't even hand gesture it enough to you! If anyone has any tips on how to woo someone, let me know. I need them desperatly. Yes, that's right folks. I said desperatly. Well, Im going to skidattle, because this internet is really gay (I love you dsl!) and I gotta get ready to go home. Always. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | You know what? I hate everything about this. I can't stand it anymore. I really can't. Everytime I think thimgs maybe looking up, they pull a 180, and smack me right in the head. I can't stand any of this anymore. Why do I have to sacrifice so much, for someone, to make them a better person, when it's most likly hurting me a hundred times more. I don't get it. Maybe I just don't want to get it. I'm ready to move now. If I had some money, I'd buy a train, plane or bus ticket now, go to NYC and forget about all of this. Start out new. That's what I need to do. I can't keep going through this. If I do, I think, in time, my head will explode. Even though death itself isn't horrible, I don't think I want to be remembered as the human bomb. I don't get anything anymore. Life isn't life anymore. It's a system of chores, that require no thought. All anything is. A system. That has too many faults. Maybe if I was cooler, and maybe if I talked more, maybe if I was pretty, people would like me too. (When I say people I mean guys.) I don't know. I guess I just need to change something. Cuz this system I have going for myself, isn't doing anything for me. I don't feel like talking anymore. Im going to go. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Yeah! This is my 100th post. That is so nifty! Go figure, this is a special post, and I'm not even making it from my own house. O yeah, by the way this is another edition of posting from a random persons house. How great is that. Im sitting in Joe's living room, with Dan Harry and Joe. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Hibb-itty-hibb-hib im so freaking happy! Today was such a good great awesomrifical day! I can't wait till tomarrow. the parade @ 9, ugh...and then the cookout/thinger at Joe's house. thats gonna be awesome. ima go..bored. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Yeah. Yeah. I'd say today was a pretty good day. Nothing too exciting. Haha. Rachel Martin said something to Jon before I got a chance too. I guess it went a little something like this.. Rachel- So, How's Dan? Jon - ...Ookay I guess.. Rachel- So..How's Dan and Heather..? Jon - *ponders..* HEATHER? Rachel - Well, not yet, but uhh.. Jon - Dan's a fag. Well, if that wasn't the best ice breaker I've ever seen.. or hurd I should say, ya know. That's great. This summer's gonna be fun. Parties. Sleepovers. Parties. Lan Parties. Sleepover-ness. Shows-nessles. Oh yeah. I dunno. I'm rambling now. I'm skidattle. Cheers! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Confused? Yes. Worried? A little. Extreamly Happy? Definitly. I think it'd work. Even with all the doubt floating around. I have so much freaking stuff to do. Crazy. I have to do three algebra assignments, two are due tomarrow. One is due on Wednesday. I have a Journal, Study Guides, and and Essay due through out the week, let alone the test on the gayest book in the world..'Of Mice and Men..' horrible. I can't read it without falling asleep. Argh. Things are slowly going to start improving though. I know it. 'I've seen the smiles fall to many times before, let me ask you is this what you've been waiting for?' Eep. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Blah-diddle Blah Blah Blah. Today has been so boring. Seriously dude. I've done nothing but work on my PS speech and VA and then I had to finish reading 'Of Mice and Men.' I hate that book with a passion. Steinback may be a very respectable author, but where the hell did he come up with an idea for that book? Crazy Bastard. And on top of that, I have to write an essay which is due tuesday, on that book. It's so not fair. I can't even read 10 pages without dozing off, or falling asleep completly. Ugh. I want to get the guys together, and go to chineese, and then to the movies. It sounds like some fun. I can't wait until marching this summer. It's going to be so much freaking fun. I'm going to be so sad though, because Steph, Tj, Doc, Browning, all of them are going to be senior's next year. It's not fair. When the guy's grade goes, I'm going to be so screwed. Thats why I have to make the BEST of it now. haha. O yeah. Tomarrrow's gonna be fun. Eep. I'll write either later if I get bored, or tomarrow...Cheers' |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Today has definitly been the best day that I think I've had in quite a while. I mean seriously, I think if anything..well almost anything would have been any diffrent, then I don't think I would of had that great of a time. I'm so happy. You know that feeling you get when someone likes you, and you like them, even though you're not together, it's still so much freaking fun? Yeah, that's what I've got right now. I definitly have gotten to know and hang out more with a certain someone. It kinda makes me sad to know that because of a certain person, I've missed out on knowing them all of this time. Maybe something would of happened earlier if I could of but all that shiz behind me earlier. Oh well. I'm not going to let it bother me..why? Because on the rare occasion that I can honestly say I'm happy..I don't want to miss any second of it. Yeah. I'm definitly going to go to sleep now. I'm so freaking tired. Cheers and Goodnight to ya all! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | This year has gone by really fast. Like really really ridiculously fast. It stil kinda feels like the first day of school. I don't know. Maybe thats just because I'm a big weird-ball. Who knows. Oo0. I might get to play piccolo in Marching Band. That's kinda cool. I'd rather be play drums, but hey, it's not a flute. I gotta go do the Relay for Life tonight. I'm glad I'm doing it. Not only for community service, but for Grandma, Uncle Russel, and Aunt Mary. I can't belive they've all past away in the last 9 months. All from the same thing too. Lung Cancer. I hate that..so don't even get me started... Tomarrow is the band trip!! I'm so freaking excited! Harry's not going to be there, which, I mean, yeah he's like one of my best friends and all, but uhh, yeah. This will definitly give me a break. And I'll be able to hang out with Dan, without having Harry all over me. That's cool. Yeah, if Jon is reading this because he clicked the link in my profile, please talk to your brother. Seriously. wth is up with that, ya know? Thaaaaanks. Well, I'm going to go. I wanna sleep a little or do some algbra..gawd. I'll prolly write more after R.F.L or Sunday. Cheers. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Today was such a horrible day. You have absolutly no fucking clue. I all I could do was sit there and think about all the shiz that's been going on, some of the shiz that happend last night, and everything else. It definitly sucked. Dunno. Might see what the guys are doing, since I have nothing better to do. We'll see. Have fun folks. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | How can spending so much time with one person, make them mean so much to you, even though, you know, they don't think of you as anything?..I don't know what to think anymore. Things like this make me so aggravated. You have no clue. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | You know what, after spending the weekend alone, I've came to alot of conclusions. I've realized what I've got in life, what I thought I had in life, and what I need. It's almost disappointing, but at the same time, it's motivation to work towards all of that. I found out who I don't want anymore. I also realized I definitly need to stop living in the past. All that shiz that went down this past summer, is all that it is..the past. Nothing more. I'm honestly trying not to care anymore. Woah. Summertime self-real-eyes-ation at it's finest folks. Hope you all enjoy. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Today has been a good day so far. I guess. I didn't go to track today, dad didnt let me. So, I went and took the test portion of my permit thing, and I passed that. I'm so happy. But I feel sick and I'm really hungry, so you wouldnt be able to tell if you saw me. Have I ever told you how much I love Ramen. I love ramen alot. Lot's and lot's. Yup. All-Righty. I think after we get done gerocery shopping, I'm going to see what the guys are up to. Then, maybe we can hangout or whatever. Dunno. I'll write later. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | It's 7:54 in the morning and im up because, last night, I went tanning, and I've ended up looking mildly like a lobster. I hurt so bad. Also, I have track in about an hour, and I'm feeling really nauseaus. Weather it's from the tanning thing, not getting a good nights sleep, or the medicine, because I am sick, I don't know. Last night, I do know, when I got up to put lotion on, I got really dizzy and felt like I did when I passed out that one time. And that's not good because I have alot of stuff to do today. I have to get the part B thing, go to the bank, put in app. at the golf coarse, and stop in at T-Mobile. Ughhh..So much to do. So little time. I'm glad though. I'ma get my yearbook on Monday. I've got to get some -people- to sign it. Man, I think I'ma be sick. Bah. O yeah, I definitly had the weirdest dream last night. Something about aliens, and a guy, and hubbard, and random kids, bible questions, french kids. I don't know. It was too much chaos for me so I just woke up. lmao. I don't want to do anything today. I feel so blah. Oh well. I don't think anyone cares. I'ma go step outside for a few. Maybe the fresh air will help me. Hoping. I'll write in here tonight. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | I've been trying to watch this World News stuff, okay. All you see, are the little Iraqi, and Palestinian kids, throwing stuff at our boys over there, and all I have to say, are where the hell are there parents. I mean seriously dude. If I lived over there, my mom or dad would be like, Hel-l-oh get your rear in gear and get in this house, the USA is marching around Mr. Roger's neighborhood, with a few MK-40's and gernades. It's not safe to play in the street at times like these. I want to move to Cocoa Beach. I want to surf again. I miss it. Makes me so sad. Today wasn't a good day. For some reason, I've just been very depressed. Maybe because I've been thinking about everything. Like when I see, a few people..it's not good for me ya kno. . .Well you don't know, because. Yeah. Its seriously hot outside. It's curently 82 in my house and it's 6:26. That's crazy. It's only May. It should be like 65 or 75. Then it would be comfortable. This d00ds, is not comfortable. My mother is driving me crazy. I was like, oh hey, I'm home and none of my friends felt like caring about me tonight, so i guess I'll speak a few words to my mother. No. Never again. Ah. And she repeats herself over and over and over again. My head is going to explode. I swear she's my source of constant headache. It's going to be impossible to stay here all summer. I hope she knows that. I'm def. going to be living at Harry, Bob or Dan's house. I don't care whose. Just as long as it's not my own. I need a hobby besides being online I think. I spend hours on end in front of this thing. Ah-mazing. I think I've rambled enough. God, she won't shut up. Help me. If anyone can save me tonight, I'll owe you something big. Promise. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Bah. Today was a very interesting day. I missed fifth period today, which is a shame because I love that class more than any of my other classes. I love learning foreign languages. My dad's taking a summer spanish coarse this year, he's going to teach me how to do it. That will be really nifty. Then i'll be able to speak 3 languages by the time I'm 16. Awesome. You wanna know something? I'm really sick and tired of hearing about other people's problems. I mean, sometimes, if something happens, and they need someone to talk too, yeah of coarse I'm here for them. That's what friends doo. But when every single day, and it's the same problem, it gets really aggravating. Especially when the problem could have easily been avoided if they would have just payed attention in the first place. Why else do people make mistakes? . . . Just so other people can make them too and fall into the same hole? I don't think so. I'm so glad tomarrow is Friday. Yay. I hope we don't have Saturday practice. I really really don't want to practice on the weekend. I've already got alot planned. 1.) Get part B done 2.) Put in app. at the golf coarse. 3.) Party somewhere. I'm sure were all going to go spend the night at someone's house this weekend. It never fails. It's all good fun though don't get me wrong. I think I'm going to go. I've got some french and algebra to get done. ya. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Hey there lazy chair! I figured since they reformatted Blog, I needed to have a catchy phrase. Ya know. Tac-8 Meet is tomarrow, for all of you interested, the field events start at 4:30 and the running events start at 5:00 @ Newton Falls. So if you're in the area, it's gonna take you a while ta get there. I'm running in the ever-popular 200m Dash and the 400m Dash. It's kinda sad though. That means we only have one meet left, that we all get to participate in. Reginals arn't until Thursday of next week. But, I got my pah-stah and my gatorade with water on the side..so I should be fine and dandy. Welp. I'm going to go. Stizuff to do yet. I'ma write in here later. Because I feel like it. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | My head is going to explode. Evangelion will make you go insane. I'm gonna end up like Auska if I keep it up. I need to write in my real journal more often too much has built up. Argh. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Yeah. Track rocks. ShinSplints suck. Im in like unbeliveable pain, 24/7. It's crazy. Season is almost over, along with school. This freshman year has gone by so fast. It's like it was yesterday I was just starting to hang out with the guys, and I was so self-concious around them. And everyone else for the matter of fact. Boy. I'm still self-concious, but I think that I do a good job hiding it from everyone, so atleast it doesnt seem like I am. I've also made a few good friends along the way. Lost some too. Thats some crazy shiz right there lemme tell you. I don't think I've really changed emotionally too much though. I'm still wah. All over the place. I'm really happy, or really sad. There's not much in between. I really need to finish watching Evangelion. I loooooooooove that anime with all my heart. Seriously. All of it. Corey is totally awesome for letting me borrow all 13 tapes of it. I'm still single. As always. Like that is ever going to change. I'm telling you, Im going to die an old and decreped old lady whose never ever been married. So sad. Arhgg. I'm going to go and see what the guys are up too, then, I can figure out what I'm going to do tonight. I can tell you one thing, I won't be home. Saving me would be too much charity for the likes of you. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Would it all be better if I wasn't here? You know, just as I thought I had things figured out, they of coarse had to go ahead and change. I thought I knew what I wanted, where I was going in life, what I was going to do in life. I guess when you get too comfortable with that kind of thing all hell must break loose. Because it surley is causing havoc now. I mean, why the hell do I even bother anymore. It leads me no where, and always seems to dissapoint me. I thought that I would make my move, and maybe have a slight chance at being happy. Even if it was for a moment. You think that's going to happen now? Think again. Thought I was going to New York City when I graduated. Can't. Why because fucking colleges have decided to rob their students of funds, and make it extremly unaffordable to pay your way in. $43,185 a year. Believe it. And to top it all of, I just don't know anymore. Just a hint for you all, don't take tylenole thinking it will take away enough pain. Because it doesnt, and then it sucks. I would love to express all of this to 'the group' but how many tears can you shed until it gets too old. Seriously. I know they said I have to talk to them, because that is what we do, we talk. But heres a prime example of the old saying it's easier said than done. I've been like this for 15 (almost 16) years of my life. You'd think I'd be used to it by now. I almost am. Maybe if I dressed up everyday, wittled away my fatness to nothing, and cared about absolutly nothing in the world, just maybe then I could be happy. Is it the pessimistic side of me that scares everyone away? No one has ever seen this side of me in person. This is what I keep to myself, and what i'd hate to put onto you guys because I don't think anyone needs to go thru exactly what I am going thru, because it's not their problems. I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I don't want to have to do anything for myself. I just want to be okay. I don't care if I'm uberly happy, but I don't want to be like this. I just don't want to care anymore, because I don't care. But theres that thing in the corner of my mind, thats like, no, you must care because it is your life. You know, you guys don't see me like this. You don't see any of it. All you see is the happy go lucky girl that is cool to be around. If you knew I was like this from the start, would you still want to be around me? I'm not a basketcase though. If that's what you're wondering. I just have no one I feel safe enough spilling all this too. And I really must say I hate all of the phoney people who pretend to care about what Im going thru. Because I hope you know that I can tell. I can see it, and I know. Let me tell you something. That's not cool d00d. not cool at all. why can't I just be able to say all of this. is it really that hard. or is it just the fact I havent found the right person to say this all too. it kills me on the inside. it really does. and i could write it all out, exactly what im feeling. when it comes to saying it though, i can't. or when i do i mess it up and everyone gets pissed off at me because i'm horrible at words. you guys wonder why i don't tell you people anything. there you go. i think what it is, is that im just not good enough. i mean, im good enough to hang out with, and too listen to everyones problems. but im just not it. how do i get like this? is it my subconcious building and building until it can't hold all of this and it spills out into my normal state of conciousness. because not long ago, i was fine. only three more years. just three. then maybe i can find what it takes to be happy. maybe i can find someone who understands me. because right now the only person i find myself to be happy around, couldnt care less about me. and hes not who you think he is. i guess it always has to come down to this, because alas this is all ive got. just me, and everything that i think about because i can't do anything else but think of things. then why the hell am i here? I dont know but i am starting to think it would all be better if I wasn't here. atleast not in brookfield. not in ohio. maybe not in the united states itself. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | K, so I typed out a really really freaking long post today before I left, and my gay computer froze, so I had to reboot without saving. Sucks right? Yeah, I thought so too. I st around for like the first half of the day. Yeah, fun for the whole family, it's assured. Then Me and Rach went to Jon's grad party for like an hour, I was kind of bummed that we had to leave before they played (they = ffb) but, I got my pic, and one of me and dan too. So I guess all was not lost. Then after, I came over too Joo's, and met up with the gentlemen ( Harry, Bob, Joe and Ryan .. sadfully no dan.) Sheesh. Yeah, I'm still here. I actually got to spend the night for like once in a very long time. It's been like a week. Sucks! The parents are stil being Nazi-ans. I swear it's all the mothers doing. If she's unhappy, she wants the rest of the known and free world to be unhappy right along with her. I can't wait til Dad starts his new job, that way he's home more in the afternoon ish. I swear, because of the habit of staying up until like 3am on the pc, I can't make it past like 12 with out a computer, Muse and water. I think I will die. Hold on. Okay. I just got really really depressed all of a sudden, I have no clue why. Maybe because this is what I do when I'm at home, and I'm always depressed there. I wish I wasn't. I think all of this is taking alot of me. I mean, I'm the mediator of the group. I listen to EVERYTHING thats going on with everybody, which I can't completly say that I dont like, because thats why Im here. But whenever I try to tell them my shiz, they always have to turn it into something about them. I hate that. And all the stuff between me and dan. Well I guess I should say lack of things that are going on between me and him. I like him so much, doesn't he realize this? I mean goodness. I hate it so bad. Great there making fun of me because im a vegetarian. what the heck. jeesh. I dont know anything anymore. I wish I could have sometime alone. I guess not. OR atleast someone to talk to. I mean really talk too. But I dont have that either. Maybe I do need to move. Get away from everything. I'm too used to this pattern of things. I need change. If I had change, I would be okay I think. Maybe thats why I never kept friends for a long amount of time. Weird. Oh well. Maybe I think about all of this stuff way too much. That could be my problem. Then again, who knows? No one because everyone has their head wrapped around there own situation and there way to busy to listen to me. I dont care anymore. at all. Actually I do but heh, you guys sure as hell wouldnt know about that. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | I didn't do much yesterday. I'm supposed to go to The Aquabats and Planet Smashers show today up at the agora. I really freaking want to go. But everyone counted on me as a ride, when I told them not too because things were up in the air, so alas, we have no ride. Dad's working up on the roof, and Mom has to be to work tomarrow at like 5 in the morning. Damn I wish I could drive. I haven't even gotten out on the road yet, when I've had my permit for about two months now. Things are startng to make me aggrivated. Maybe I need a break from people. I think that's what it is. People depend on me too much. Don't ask why. I don't know why they would be like that with me. I'm going to go find something to do. Maybe I'll play some stuff on my guitar. Yeah, that sounds good. I'ma go jam. outz! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | 'From when I was very young it would always make me forget everything around from me and come into a very blissful, or simple, state. Throughout all my life it's been an escape from everything, and as you are in that process of escape you see all those layers peel away or all those things that imprison you in your life... To me that's the only thing that is me, everything else is down to evolution and where I was on the planet - I could have been anyone, and I'm trying to find the most basic, simplistic, form of what I am. I can relate to those moments in my life when I've been playing music - it's like music is my origin of symmetry.' Okay. Too much? I never know. It sums up what music means too me, because someone, who im not mentioning, doesnt get it. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | http://www.iliekmuse.now.nu/ ^ That has to be about the funniest thing I've seen all day. I suggest you check it out, you guys may not get the jokes though. I don't know what I'm going to do today. The guys haven't called, so I might end up staying home the whole day. I need a big serving size meal of a life. Yeah. I want to be in a band. OF coarse the 'band' we have now hasn't done anything, and at this rate, I don't think that we will be doing anything. The brother and Lilly came over today. Dunno. I didn't hang with them much. Bill and I are too quiet. Im gonna go. Find something to do. Maybe the guys will show up at the house. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Post 111: Everyone see the video for 'Uno' by Muse? If you have you'll know what I'm talking about. I'm so happy, I finally got my album thing up for everyone too look at. I just need more pics now. But I've got some from 'Ska is Dead,' and I'm going to that concert on Monday, hopefully *Crosses Fingers* I really wanna see The Planet Smashers! w00t. Tomarrow is a big birthday extravaganza, Rachel Martin's turning 14 and Maggey's turning 16. That's nifty. I wish I had a summer birthday. No, mine has to be in the cold and rainey fall. Damn October 20th. Can't wait until I turn 16, it's like in 4 months and 9 days. Something like that. Oh well. I'm definintly going to have a sweet birthday party. Atleast I hope. Might have my party in the summer. That way we can actually party. Insted of freezing lumberjack-style on the deck. I wanna have a super killer pool party. For the Cool Kids at my school. wow. i gotcha there. i got cha. do you have cha? hee hee. That's super rad my friend. I'm gonna go, so I can go do..well nothing but. Yeah. Ima skidattle. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | I woke up at noon. I feel like I need more sleep though. Today's going to be boring, I can tell. I bet you any money that they won't call. Oh well. It bothers me, but I highly doubt they want to spend everyday with me. I don't know who would. You know, it's only June 9th, and I'm already bored. Psh. This is going to be one long summer. Wonder when there going to Kansas. Need to find that out. Maybe me and someone can spend some good time together. Sounds like a plan. =). I don't know why I try so hard. I just do. I'd like to think I'm getting somewhere. Doubt it though. I'm gonna go. Gotta find something to do. Cheers. btw - Happy BDay Bells! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Up past 2 again. Sitting here, thinking way too much. I wish I didn't worry about everything the way I do. I don't know what to do about anything anymore. I try so hard, to make things go the way they should. 'and no reason why i should try to go on anymore my reason's all gone, no reason why you should try to make excuses to make me feel alright excuses call for stupid reasons and i know that it's not much that i can offer right now just give me one little second and i will try my hardest to make you feel like i'm someone else.' - Pretty, Pretty. T.E.N Understand why I love that band. I don't want anyone to think I'm something I'm not. Or that Im a certain way that I'm not. I can't help it though. You people don't want to see me sad or depressed. I'm such a person pleaser, and I'm that in a way that I don't want people to get worried, or upset over me or something that someone else did. It's not fair to them. At the same time, it's not fair to me. Why can't people just not rely on me too feel better. I hate this. I'm going to bed. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Woo! Today was so fun!! My mum woke me up at like, 10:30 and was like, hey we're going to the beach today so get going.. You know me in the morning.. So I was like, ...mumble mumble..guys..mumble mumble.. Yeah, I ended up using my ways and got Dan to go, then we all had to fit in my moms car. joyus. so it was joo in the passenger seat, and harry - me - dan in the back. Hee Hee. I liked the turns! =) Then we swam some, walked/skateborded/swam more/walked/sat around more you know. Then we came home. It was an overall nice day though. i hope we have more like that! I'll prolly write later, so b-y-e |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Today was so freaking boring. Remind me never to go over there when the guys are playing video games. Never ever ever ever. Bah. Hopefully tomarrow will be better. . .We can all wish. Flopp-ay-diskit. McArdean. Hee hee. Those never die. Ever. Kinda like the Lord of the Ring's trilogy. When you think/hope that it's finally over, wham bam thank you ma'am, it comes back with more shizzle to throw at cha. Ugh Sigh. na na na na na... yah. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | I think this is the second one of the day for me. oh well.It's kinda ironic how much time I actually spend in front of this computer. but hey, what else would I spend my time on. Laying outside is a given. I'm prolly going to do that later. due to the fact I have a horrible tanline. hee hee. i'm going down to harry's later. i haven't talked to him yet today so i don't know when, but i am. my stomach hurts. ugh. don't feel grand(e). 'this is what you hum you hum..WOAHH OH WHOA..' Ok-a, im bored. joy-fuuuul. fuul..cant you tell. 1234 1234. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | 'Won't you come over, You know that you want to. How does it feel to know I still want you? Why do we always seem to want what we can't have?' - The Ataris 'Between Me and You' How fitting is this lyric snippit. Ah-mazing. I need to do something. I think I need to make a move towards the future. dun dun dun. i was going to put a ex-claim-ation mark there but its more interesting this way. very much so. im tired. been tired. shouldnt be tired. why. its vacation. boating was fun. we should do more of it. o ya. i also want to camp out in the backyard with the gentlemen. hee hee. it would be so much fun. absolutly. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | urlLink hee hee! Wow. You know what. Some people dont realize what they have. id enjoy having something like that. some people ill never get. i cant wait till tomarrow. ill get to go back to harrys. that means more than likley dan - izzle will be there. spells fun for me. yea. after that last post i went to harrys house from like 6 til 1030 almost 11 ish. gotta love it over there. ima skidattle. prolly write later when the rents go to sleep. enjoy! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Took the boat out today. Fun Fun Fun. Makes me miss the ocean terribly so. Might go see john mayer and maroon 5. why you ask. because it would be a free concert with the aunts in columbus. joyful. warped tour is in like a month or so. im so damn happy. im bored. i cant stand to be bored but i am. i want to hang out with the guys. but id have to find them first. i also want to hang out with dan. but thats not going to happen without the other guys around. jooo-y. i want to surf. its not fair being here all the time. i wish i could just pick up my shiz and go to cocoa beach for like a week. that's all i ask. a week. im going to go. have to find something to do. joy-us. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | It's over already? I guess time fly's when you're having fun. Or not.. Yesterday was so much fun! Atleast for the first part. All I had to do was take the World History exam, then I was done. I passed it with a 97%. I'm happy. Then I walked to Joo's house and met up with him, Harry, Bob and Maggey. Yeah Dan came later. So we all hung out, Maggey left at like half - past noon-ish. Then we all just kinda sat around, trampoline, watched Bob play starcraft, a few movies, ect. Yeah. Then I called my mom and asked her if I could spend the night, so of coarse she was like, 'Yeah of coarse.' So she came and got me, and on the way to the house to pick stuff up for later, she was like, im seriously debating about leaving your father, and im going to look for an apartment in Niles, and ect. all while I was going to leave in a half hour to meet up with the guys. Right. So I didn't let it bother me. Then, my dad called, and was like, flipping out on me. He was like, I didnt raise you for 16 years to just run all the damn time, and you're being such a dissapointment, and blah blah blah. It didn't help, I could of probably told you and made a bet on the fact that he was drinking previously to this, as he always seems to do, every single fucking night, it never ends. I always thought he was the one I could stand the most, now, Im beginning to take it all back. Of coarse I was outside when I was talking to him, they were watching TV inside, so I was being polite. And the only person in the world who could make me cry in an instant decided to flip the fuck out on me, while I was at Joo's house. So of coarse Harry had came out too see what was wrong. I was sitting by the tiki-tourches that me and Dan had set up and I was all like, im not going to let it get to me, Ima keep it all bottled up, but I think I had been doing that for too long because as soon as he went to give me a hug, I lost it. That's the first time I really ever let anyone see me cry, let alone comfort me. I'm really glad they were there though. Because if they werent, who knows what might of happened. So then, we went inside after like a half hour of crying and comforting, and then me bob and harry all sat down and talked for a while, which helped so freaking much. I never knew people actually cared about me. They were all worried. Why? I didn't think that I could mean anything to anybody. I guess I do. Learn something new everyday don't we? Yeah. Yesterday was quite the rollercoaster ride of emotions and events. Eep! I'll prolly end up writing later, if the mother and father arn't yelling at each other again, which I have a feeling they will, just because, they shouldn't be in the same room together. Someone save me.. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | I don't know what i'm doing anymore. I really like him, I mean I really do, but am I just kidding myself? Is it actually capeable that the kid I like, likes me just the same, but also has the same mentality as i do when it comes to getting up the guts to making the first step? Could it honestly be possible? You know, tomarrow is the last day of school. And it doesnt feel like it. At all. It feels like the middle of the year. On top of that, things have been happening, and shiz has been going down that make me want to explode. Why I constantly put up with it all is literally beyond me. I bet you anyone else in my shoes would of had a nervous break down by now. I might loose a brother, that I never really got to know. Yeah, cuz the dummy signed up for the army a few years ago, and when Lilly came along, they put him in the reserves. Dont you know that the reserves are being called out? His group has already been activated. That scares the crap out of me. I don't want him to go. He has a kid he has to raise. He's got me, his only sister and brothers to be around. It's all too much. And I still have one more final to go. People make too much out of nothing, and some don't make enough out of anything. This worlds a crazy place, and my mind has decided to run at it's own pace. Why can't I be the one as the center of attention? It's not fair for me to have to fight for everything, when I've got nothing to show. Am I not fighting hard enough? Or am I just going to be alone for the rest of my life? I don't care anymore. At all. I don't fucking care. You people don't care about what you put me through, you don't care about what I'm put through, you don't care at all. So you know what, it's time for a change. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Interessant. Today was the first day of finals. Whoopty-Doo. I finished my Algebra, and took the first part of my french today. It was alright. Easier than I thought. Which is good. I'm definitly not complaining. After, I left and met up with Chris and Harry at the gazeebo, sat around for a while there. Then, chris left and we decided that we were going to go and kidnap Dan. So, we went and sat under the big tree in the practice field and read, it was soo nice out! Then we commandeered him, went to Joe's, had a water fight, on a trampoline, and then I came home. I only wished. You know, I wish that I would have more guts, too get up the nerve sometime. It never happens. I don't think he will ever either. But if he really wants something to begin between us, I'm hoping he would say something. Tomarrows a long day, I have Science Final, 2nd part of Francaise, and English. Yay! .. not. I get out after 2nd period on Thursday though! Last day of school! w00t! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Top Ten Songs I am really into right now 10. The Rasmus - 'In the shadows' 9. Outkast - 'Roses' aka CAROLINE! 8. Jimmy Eat World - 'The Sweetness' 7. Bright Eyes - 'Nothing Ever Gets Crossed Out' 6. Muse - 'Feeling Good' 5. The Beautiful Mistake - 'December' 4. The Planet Smashers - 'Life of the Party' 3. Muse - 'Dark Stars' 2. Reel Big Fish - 'Kiss Me Deadly' 1. 'This room's too cold, but you're so hot' - The Early November Top Ten Favorite Movies of all Time 10. Interview with a Vampire 9. Life as a house 8. Moulin Rouge 7. Halloween 4 & 5 6. Romeo + Juliet 5. Igby goes Down 4. Jurassic Park 3. Pirates of the Carribean 2. Tomb Raider (I think) 1. Office Space |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Yeah, I went and saw it with the gentlemen today. That was great. We went to the mall before for a while, walked over to the theater, and then we all recriuted back to Bob's house after. The movie had some very nicely done effects and fight scenes. A few dry spots, and some questionable things. Like, where does his web shoot too, when theres nothing around him? - Confusing? I know. Not sure what I'm doing tomarrow. I'm sure I'll be wherever they are though. Wanna know something? I don't think that I have ever been home one day completly this summer. That's okay though. I love spending time with them. Even when there's nothing to do and we just sit there making up stupid stuff. That's the best. I hope I get some sort of a response from him soon. I'm so nervous and so confused all at the same time. But hey, that's okay. Maybe it's a good thing he's thinking about it. So, I'm not quite complaining just yet. Well, even though I have nothing to do, I'm gonna go. I'm tired. - I'll probably write in here laterz! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Song: 'Yo, Check out my ride.' - The Aquabats Mood: Oak - kay. I figured that since I had a blog, and it was really depressing evertime I would go to write in it, I would make a new blog, that would be happy! So here it goes.. Yeah, since I didnt get much sleep Friday night, because we decided to be stupid and stay up all night, and I didn't go to bed last night until 3, I was so freaking tired today. Plus, Dad woke me up at 9:45 to go to breakfast with Aunt Kat, Uncle Tom and Grandpa. That was fun. I got to drive home too so that was cool. Then I went shopping with Dad for a while, after that I went to Joe's house and met up with him, Harry and Ryan. I was hoping Dan would be there, since I need to conversize with him. But he wasnt. So Yeah. I have nothing to really say since this isn't a bad mood blogger. haha. I'll writecha latah! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Wow, I' m so proud of the Blogger people. They've finally let us edit how we want our font to look. And to that I'll applaude them. Last night I went out to eat with the family, and the Aunt and Uncleness. That was great fun. Made me sad that I couldn't watch any of my videos last night since they lack the capeablities of DSL. I would hate the be them. I went to the movies none the less today though. Went and saw 'Mean Girls.' It was actually a very good movie. It really shows the truths of teenage labling, and things like that. Though at some points it was quite exaggerated, but I think the whole point of films of that mannor, would be to make it dramatic. I started to read, 'Brave New World,' by Huxley. Very good. It makes you think, yes I mean MAKES! Because in the book you have to learn everything that is going on. Since it is about genomes, stem cell cloning and human harvesting, and it was written in 1932. Almost sad is what it is. I mean, we just cloned the first human being last year, but a single man wrote a whole novel on it, basically explaining the process back in the thirties. I also (finally) picked up the book, 'Rule by Secrecy,' by Jim Marrs. I was so excited. I've wanted to sit down and read that book for a while now. It's basically about conspiracies, diffrent groups, truths about mass media, and things of that mannor. It will be a good read. Marching band starts in almost a week, more like eight days, and my Muse concert is in 18 days. So freaking excited. Its going to be the highlight of my summer by far. Oh well. I guess that's all I have to say for now. Maybe i'll write later. Not sure though. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Music: Darude - 'Sandstorm' vs. Robert Miles - 'Children' I didn't do anything today. Some stuff that people said made me rethink everything. I hate when that happens. Nobody ever comments in this thing. Besides Cups, so to you, I thank. I miss talking to a few people. I'm glad I started to talk to a few again. So I'm going to go. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Music: Muse - 'Falling Away With You' I was talking to a couple of old friends today. I hurd them talk about what they did yesterday, about how they get up and go to church every Sunday morning. How bizzare. Ideas like that are just bizzare to me. How can so many people have that much dedication to one thing, for so long? Now, I can understand having dedication in something like that if it was say, marraige, school something along those lines but with that, it's always something new, bold and interesting. Doesn't the church feed you the same stories that you've probably hurd since you we're a child? I'm sorry, but repeditiveness is one of my ultimate pet peeves. I don't exactly write off the theory of a 'greater power,' so to say, but I can't agree with something that can't give me explanation and facts. I'd rather have nothing to believe in than believe in something I can't rely on and prove. The other thought, is the thought of having someone have control of your life. I know that you say 'he doesn't control it, he just gives you options.' To me it sounds too much like a buisness. And I don't want someone else to have control of anything. I've always been told, 'I'm my own person, no one can dictate me.' So I'd sure as hell like to live it that way. Another thing, not too far off subject, but not exactly about the 'Evolution,' objection and what not, is the question of the end of the world. The Apocalypse as it where. Have you ever woken up, in the middle of the night, when it's pitch black, and not realizing it's only 3-ish and you thought the world was over? What would you do in the last few moments? For the brief moment of confusion, I get paniced. I realized that I haven't said half of the things I wish I would of, and that I haven't did half the things I would of liked to. But I know that in the few moments left, I could'nt get half of those accomplished. Thus, feeling regret, and sorrow. I think that's what scares me. I'm not scared of the Apocalypse or dying for that fact. I'm scared of not doing the things I need to do, or say the things I need to say. Thats enough of my deep thoughts for you, for now. I'm sure I'll be back later with more. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Music: 'Zanzibar' - Suburban Legends 'Falling without you' - Muse So. Today wasn't so grand. I found out that laying down on my floor, and setting the fan right in front of me on high, with all the lights off and curtians closed, listening to Muse is very relaxing. I spent most of my day doing that today. Tomarrow, I'm gonna head up to the Grove City Outlets, and do some shopping with the auntness. That should be fun. Im so bored, and tired of this vacation crap. I just want school to start up again. That way I don't have days like these where I just sit around and do absolutly nothing. Besides think. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Ugh. Today was a boring day. Little to do. All I've done, was walk down to Harry's, where I stayed for maybe three hours and watched them play Kingdom Hearts. A beautifully made game (art wise) but a bore to sit and watch. So I left. Still no word. That kind of thing irritates me. But oh well. We all can't be choosers, now can we? Or just not me. If I find more to detail you about, I'll make sure to write later. But don't get to hopefull. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Haven't done anything today. Yeah, I sat around infront of the pc and wrote somethings. Rather than that and cleaning up the house a bit I've just been here. Todays an oddish day. Hopefully this feeling will pass by tomarrow. If it doesn't then I'll probably be worse off. I'm still extremly excited about seeing Muse, live in 27 days! That's going to be the highlight of the year by far. Especially, since it's a festivle, they most likley have a meet and greet tent out. Meaning I get to meet him. But enough of that. 'Everything that happens is supposed to be, and it's all predetermined, can't change your destiny, guess I'll just keep moving so they may be, and one day I may get to where I'm going..' - 'Nothing Gets Crossed Out' - Bright Eyes |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Well I spent the night over at Harry's house last night with the gentlemen. Didn't do much, played videogames, DDR, watched some anime. That was about it. Though we did walk to chinese earlier, so that was good fun. I still have no word about that letter. No one has. Kind of upsets me, but there are signs of hope. Since Sarah had to pull out on me for Warped Tour, it's gonna be just me and pops at the annual summer concert of the year. And because he still has back troubles, he asked me if I could look at another show. So I found one. A damn good one at that. I found the Curosia Festivle with -The Cure -MUSE! -Thursday -Auf Der Maur! -Interpool -The Rapture -Mogwai -The Cooper Temple Clause. That means, me..live and in the flesh, get to watch, and meet, (because I will NOT leave that show without meeting him) Matthew Bellamy play infront of my very eyes! Holy Crap! That will be so freaking amazing, I might just die. He's my ideal guitar-master, and has the BEST voice I have ever hurd..out of all of the other amazing singers like, Ace Enders, Brandon Boyd, and Matt Smasher. Matthew tops them all. Its going to be like woah. But the tix are expensive. So hopefully that will be a striking iniciative for Dad to help me in my persue of meeting him. Like I said. I won't leave until I have an autograph and a picture! hehe. It's only fair tho! At this point, I don't care about not going to Warped. So for those who were maybe looking at going with me, sorry, but Muse is definitly worth it to blow off warped for. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Well today was a fun, but long day! Came home from Aunt Kat's house around 9:30 this morning, got changed, then Rachelness came and picked me up at a little after 10. Went to Mary's house, got party supplies, opened my present (Thanks ladies!) then we coo-bye-yah-ed down to Jenna's and started setting up in her cabin. Made many trips back and fourth. Yeah. She was so surprised, and the cabin looked cool! Hehe, we dressed up in her little sisters play clothes, that were like, sparkley non fitting items, and went to the movie store and Pizza Hut, waved to people and got some interesting looks. O yeah, and she's getting an underground pool, oh my goodness, she has some nice looking workers! (The shell necklace guy!!) Yea, over all between the eating of icing, the cake..me almost getting killed by Rachel, and humiliating myself in front of people..it was a good day. Catch you on the DL!! |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | I woke up to the 'rents fighting. Then Aunt Kathy called and rescued me to her house. Mom followed. > I swam with Emma and Noah for 6 hours. I think I have chlorine poisoning because I don't feel good and my ears hurt. I came home, and they faught some more. So I sat in my room listing to Muse for a few hours. Then ventured out into the living room to go online. I don't know where mom is. Hm. Tomarrow will probably be quite interesting. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Goodness! I have had nothing to do, this whole day. Seriously, I went online for a few hours, called Bob, because all of the gentlemen were over there and found out that they were all leaving in a little bit anywho. So I stayed home the whole dang day. Fell asleep though around 2:45 until almost 6. I was quite sleepy. I'm really hoping that tomarrow will be better. But who knows what everyone is doing. As of now I'm going to Warped Tour with just my Dad, which will suck for him, because I go into the pits, and I don't think he can. Meaning I'll have to leave him alone for most of the time that were there. That is so going to be boring for him. Maybe I can find someone to tag along. Because Sarah was supposed to go with me, until she found out she has driving and danceline that day. So I'm going alone. Marching band starts in less than a month. 26 days to be exact. Oh, joy. I'm guessing that I'll type more tonight. The boredom is effecting my communication skills. Ba. |
1,415,200 | female | 15 | Student | Libra | 10,June,2004 | Okay, so I found the magical wonders of xanga, and I must say, they've won me over. But I know some of you kids out there read this thing, so for the hell of it, I'll update. So Cups, this one's for you. I think I'll start by giving you the expo on wensday, since it was rad and I heart it. We left the house at 3:30 and go there at almost exactly 5. It was down at Blossom which was really nice. Then I found out I couldn't of taken in my camera because they don't allow it. And because it was pouring we had to take raincoats. (Yeah, it stopped raining about 20 mins afer we got in.) Then we watched Auf Der Maur. The lead, Melissa is the ex-bassist for the Smashing Pumpkins. Who, in her age still rocked like a mother. I couldn't believe how rad she was. She is now my vanilla! Then we watched Thursday, who is amazing live. Didn't expect that great of a job by them at all. Plus it was the last day of the tour for them, and they we're filming a rock movie called 'God's Lot,' (btw, second stage was in a parking lot.) After that (when everyone else left for a while) I stopped by and talked to him, Geoff, (lead of Thursday) for a good half hour. He's such a sweetheart, it's great how he listened to me. I wish I had more people like that around me more often. Gave me some good words of wisdom. Then came Muse. Oh dear dear me. I was so bloddy excited for them to come out. Okay so the stage wasn't more than the width of a classroom. Maybe a tad bit more. And where I was standing I was right on the baracade, and I was in front of Matt. Who I could easily drool over, let alone sweaty and with a rad guitar. So they played, Hysteria, New Born, Butterflies and Hurricanes, The Small Print and Stockholm Syndrome. I was a bit dissapointed because I didn't get to hear 'Plug in Baby,' so what I did, was I yelled it really loud, as they were still on stage, and then the group of about 10 forigners screamed out was sounded like, 'Ploog En Bah-bay' but it was just there accent. It was still great. So they stopped, looked at each other, and came back on, and played it. I was so happy. Oh yeah, after Stockholm Syndrome, and after the riff thing they played after, Matt was on the ground right in front of me, so when he stood up he was like, 'hugs for everyone,' and so I gave him a big hug, and kissed him on the cheek! (you only live once right?) and then he looked down at me, and was like, 'alright then,' and gave me a kiss back! I thought I was going to die. but I didn't! Then we decided to catch The Cure, who by all means suck live. Its like all stoner/elevator music. Horrible. So we left after the first 2 or 3 songs. It was like, 10:30 by the time we got out, and we wanted dinner, so we went to Denny's where we ended up running into Melissa from Auf Der Maur, talked to her for like 10 mins. then ate, and came home. Sound great? Yes! It was! |
3,868,966 | female | 27 | Education | Gemini | 07,July,2004 | Well I'm not sure what a Blog is and so this will be me figuring it out as I go. LOL of all things I'm in a pretty crappy mood tonight too. Joy. I have lots I should be journaling about and I guess I might as well work on it here. I used to have an Open Diary, a site that is still near and dear to my heart. But that got compromised by someone and I took it down and then never had the umphf to start over. Whats on my mind tonight. Who knows. Well what WAS on my mind this morning at work was this. He spent the night last night. That was cool, always is very nice to be in his arms. To be aware of his warmth all night. I actually didn't sleep much last night. Told him this morning that I didn't know why but I do know. I may only have 4 more weeks with him. 4 more weeks to last my lifetime of having someone hold me and love me for no reason, just because they do. He holds me...all day sometimes. I love the morning light shining on his face as he wakes next to me....his blue eyes gazing back at me with his soft smile. Lying in the darkness, just before sleep sometimes he tells me things. Last week he drifted off in my arms and when I had to leave he woke and told me he knew he was falling. And I said I know. I held him for longer before I finally had to leave. The other night we were sleeping and he sat up in the night...sort of upset or sad. He said baby i just don't want to lose you. And I said so don't and held him and he fell back to sleep with me. It's like his fears and heart show in the dark of night. And I know because mine do too. When we drank cider the other night...things started to be said that we feel...and are afraid to say. I still can't say it so much in words. I want to and I miss him so much tonight it aches. But early this morning...before the sun rose, I looked over at him and he reached for me in his sleep and held me close to his chest. Said I love you baby. I said I love you too...then I held him so tight....so much it hurt because I ache for him, ache to tell him what's in my heart. Ache to be with him and really give all of me to him. It's ripping me open that in a month or so it may be over. Maybe not...but what if. What if it all changes...we go apart... I know we can live through that...but that's not the point. I can't spend my life wondering what would have been if we had given this a real go. In my dreams I want to share a home, to have him come home for dinner at night and to wake with him every day. I want to play our games and watch our movies and have our friends. I want to see what our babies would look like and take them places. To make pictures of us that match the dreams in my heart. How could I have known that he would be so much so soon and that I would never want to let him go. I think I'll stop with that cuz I don't wanna talk about what I don't wanna talk about anyhoo. |
3,544,864 | female | 33 | indUnk | Sagittarius | 04,June,2004 | I awoke this morning in a foul mood. Why?? I don't really know. I had become a little testy on the phone with my girlfriend last night but not enough to justify it carrying over to the next day. One thing I do know is it is setting the precedence for the rest of the day, which isn't really surprising as once I get in a foul mood it is extremely hard to pull myself up out of the trenches of self loathing and hatred. I've been at work for the last 4 hours and have thus far accomplished nothing, at least a lot more nothing then what I usually accomplish while at work. In recent times I have slipped from a model employee to the try to do as little as possible disgruntle employee, reason being my boss recently hired a new employee and our office is turning into a good ole boys club where I being of the opposite sex feel out of place. I work at a university and have worked in the same department for the past four years, my official job title is Computer Support Assistant yet my responsibilities have grown much since I started gainful employment here. Yet now I’m feeling under appreciated as the new guy is getting paid more than me and is perhaps destined, in the near future, for a pay rise, just to stick the knife in a little deeper. You could argue that his job title carries more clout then mine as he is officially known as a Web Developer, yet I as a lowly old Computer Support Assistant should technically be paid less, yet it appears that I have moved from the illustrious realm of shit kicker to web developer over the years, yet I still kick the shit when ever someone is in. Technically we should be on an equal playing field, yet this too doesn’t seem to be the case. Because I have been here the longest I am given the added responsibility of maintaining our servers while my boss lays on a beach somewhere smelling of coconut oil and slowly burning flesh. But alas it is not to be, I must suffer in silence, I know I’ve not been very silent. I do however feel much better now after this little venture, perhaps my foul mood was simply due to pent up frustrations which have since subsided as a result of this writing. I feel better now and perhaps well enough to do some real work. |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | wowwwza fer real i have just been happy lately. like theres nothing to bring a girl down, well a few, but like honestly, my life is amazing riot nio. for example, yesterday i worked with jim, and hes just really nice and i love that kid. then i could drive home cuz my parents were so thoughtful as to give me my liscence back. then me tess mart and clarr warched one of the worlds best movies : dickie roberts: former child star. and something as simple as playing a few games b4 bed just made the night complete. i went to bed happy and woke up in the night laughing b/c sarah started screaming things in her sleep waking us all up. then in the mooonin i ate pop tarts, which was a positive, but the best part was emma was doing all of her dances for us and hannah was attempting them too. it was hillarious. and then we hit shady izzoak. it just was one of the best spans of times EVER. u know what i was thinking about tho, just to go deep for a sec. having a boyfriend or a girl friend is so WIERD. like think about it. you pour your heart aout to one person, and say all these things, and do little cute things for them like go to their games or buy them presents, or suprise them somewhere. but then like, when youre 'done' with them and move on to the next person, you do it all again, and its all the SAME. like, you end up saying that same nice things, and going to the same games, only for a differnt person. like why does it mean anything any more. or why do ppl not get offended when someone askes them out. i do. so the next time that a guy askes me out im going to start crying and ask them why they dont care about me. but seriously think about that. it makes you wonder the significance of your relationships. gatta eat and then coach, wish my sistas team luck. ~~monroe |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | k well last night was one of the funnest nights in a while. we took care of business on jenny's tramp, and we watched a few quality movies such as hollow man, memento and small portion or rats. we had one mass CO-ED sleepover which is just a positive step in a whole new direction. but the guys were just to 'with it'when we played chuck or fuck, but they're new...i guess u could say. also avital sang a few songs which were amazing, on the flip-side, she woke up the entire house at 5 in da mooonin. but honestly it was fun. next step: sleeping in the shaggin. it will happen, im calling it. oh and david wilkinson you owe me two dollars and do not deny it. u happen to make the same bet twice and, yes, you lost so PAY UP. oh and u spelled ur own name wrong in sarahs yearbook from way back in the day. ur spelled ur name wilkonson. (poor kid) ahem... ok, i really dont know what to say, im so conflicting. a part of me really wants to just blow up and write this nasty blog about something that happened. because i felt like i was about to throw up for about..mm..a couple hours last night. like i try to tell myself that i dont care, and its not a big deal and to move on, and like ive been trying to psyche myself out for like the past few weeks but i guess im not doing a good enough job. but like it really ISNT that big of a deal and i dont even know why im wasting ppls time writing this. i think its not that big of a deal to me until im really there caought up in it, then it means the world to me. aaah. i hafta go im helping coach my dads soccer team baby ttyl |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | i forgot a crutial part of my day. now i want you to honestly say it out loud, just cuz its fun. The cap. words are the words with the accent in the sentece. its just cool cuz it kinda changes what they sentence means. say it with me: I will see you in the morning. i WILL see you in the morning. i will SEE you in the morning. i will see YOU in the morning. i will see you IN the morning. i will see you in THE morning. i will see you in the MORNING. thanks guys that was fun ill see you in the morning |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | well lets see. 2day i visited augsburg, played nintendo with quaile and buyas, i worked with yossi and jamie, hmm and hung out with the jew kids. it was a hot one. soo hot. want to touch..nvm. oh and CLAIRE BROKE HER PHONE. lets see. she made it about....45 minutes with that phone. i got it. lets all pitch in some money and buy her ONE of those clips (the one that attaches the mitten to your jacket sleeve) and clip one end to her phone and the other to her FACE. now that thats settled.. the shaggin last night was a GROOD...i mean great...and good... great and good... time, david did manage cover his face in wax. Typical david forgot that the candles would eventually overflow with wax, and he was lying on the floor under one of the corner-shelves and all the wax flowed off the shelf on to his face. it was a beautiful thing. oh and we did have a HARD CORE card fight, and yes i took every one with authority. especially clay. poor kid. but honestly the shaggy waggy looks emaculate, everyone should check it out, and david would like the company. it would give him something to do other then make out with his sister. moving on i have the thought of the blog. ok. lets say u have a friend or a lover or someone who talks about a past person. like a friend talking about an old friend or a lover talking about an old lover. and they talk so, like, lovingly about them. and like how they miss them so much or like they were devistated that they couldnt see each other cuz they moved, died, or broke up or something. ok. well do ever wonder if they are thinking like that about you? like so u arnt frinds with someone ne more, or like arnt dating someone ne more, do u think that they are having those same feelings about you? like are they upset cuz they cant be with u ne more? or was that one person they were talking about just amazingly special to them and u dont mean nething to them, and they havnt thought about you since. see that bothers me. i guess that whole paragraph was saying that i wish that i knew if ppl were thinking about me the way they thought about other ppl or like im thinking about them. like if i meant ne thing to them. cuz maybe i thought of them as a best friend, but they only thought of me as someone to hang out with when they were bored...... well its 1 in the morning and i should be hittin the sack. i am going to Bethel tmrw, im leaving at like 130, call me if u wanna hit that with me. night *alison |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | hewlow alright well big news about the shaggin almost being done, it does look hot, ill admit that. umm survive it and drive it just finished about an hour ago, it it was STUPID. they gave both of them cars b/c neither of them were going to stop. see that just ruins the fun but w/e floats ur boat. they did go around about 1500 times, and really thats sick. if ne one wants to come to colleges with me, hit me up cuz im getting lonley. im going to gustavus this morning, im going to one tmrw and 2 on friday. oh and COME AND VISIT ME WHEN IM WORKGING 2NITE AND TMRW 4-9. ok so the feeling of the blog. this random feeling that was pissing me off is the 'sudden not caring' feeling. dadaadadaa. idk if ne one u have felt that, but i bet that u have. its like u think that someone really cares about you or something that ur doing, and then when ur done then they just kinda...stop caring...and u wonder if they really cared that much earlier or if they were just kinda doing it b/c they had to, like if u guys were dating. or if...uumm...uu..were..bbsitting someone..hmm. and that just sucks and makes u just feel not cool. but its okay, ive found things in my life to make up for it, for example, claires car. i have NEVER been sad when im in claires car, she always has a happy mix, or good things happen in thurr. so moral of the 10 second story :if ur in a pissy mood hit up claires car. alrrrizzite, gatta bounce beyatch donde esta la biblioteca Pedro? *~aya~* |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | ok so this one is going to be dedicated to lying becuase i think that its a problem that has infested ppl lately and it is just not cool. im not saying that everyone lies xcept for me b/c i do it too. but i just want to say that a lot of the lying that is going on right now is really hurting ppl, for example a witnessed a lie that took place about 20 minutes ago and if it were me on the other end i probably would have cried. like ditching ppl isnt cool. ill just leave it at that. and i just want to give a should out to the ppl who build on other lies : someone is ALWAYS going to find out no matter what. anf it is only going to get worse. there is no way to live a lie for your ENTIRE life, b/c eventually its going to come up again and its only going to be 10x worse then. so just stop being stupid and just admit what u need to say, or be mature and talk about it. b/c if ur lying ur obviously trying to cover something up, which really should be talked about. were all mature ppl here so, like if were me, i would have so much more respect for you if u actually laid it all out for me, and i would realize that u are being the bigger person and in the end i would later thank you for that. so thats a HINT for all those ppl out there u are NOT TALKING TO BE BECAUSE ITS REALLY BOTHERING ME BECAUSE NOT TALKING TO SOMEONE ABOUT IT IS AS BAD AS LYING ABOUT IT. its not any different. im sorry im just in a bad mood right now b/c so many ppl lied to me tonight, are lying to mo over a spread out amount of time, or are lying to eachtoher. aye aye aye im not sure if u would understand, but go to jason mraz's website and it explains it very well, but seriously guys, THE BOYS GONE HOME oh and we died claires hair today, its like a light strawberry blonde, it looks good. hit me up if u want ur hair died. sorry guys al |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | WELL i have a lot say considering i havent blogged since the day b4 the euro exam. but i decided to start over with a new blog and like vow to blog eaerry day. (every day). tonight was a good night, we went over to alainers and we just partayyed it up like no other, it was a lot better then sitting in the wendys parking lot for the entire night, ill let u know that one from some past experience...OH and today was good. WE RE-DID THE FRIGGEN SHAGGIN!!. there are no words to describe what we did to it,but it just looks amazing, ill tell u that much. and its going to bet better once we put in the shelves and like put that gold shia all over it. this day would have been the best day ever except for the fact that davids mom SPAZZED on us because there was a few rolls of TP in his trees and he was to spoiled to clean it up, but im going to put that behind me and move on. but guys remember, 'if u do it again you are no longer welcome in our house' i was talking to byers about 1/2 hour ago about this, and he told me to blog so here it is...be excited. ok well im saying that ppl make it really hard to figure things out. like things never work out the way they should in the first place, and then once they get screwed up other ppl who dont really know what they are talking about make it so much harder to fix. rumors get started, ppl talk behind other ppls backs and ppl shoot other people. im sure ur all thinking about a specific situation that is going on right now, and thats not what im talking about, im just talking about problems in general. like if things just went bad and only the people who were involved knew about it then it would be so much easier to fix. but dont get me wrong, not all situations. like if ur getting stalked by a crazy old lady wearing over-all shorts that likes to go walking at 2 in the morning then PLEASE talk to the police or something. but like about all the 'drama'that happens. i think that we should all be like buddah and let it flow. nothing matters b/c whats happened has happened and u cant do ne thing to change that. also u cannot change how ppl are feeling b/c if ur changing ne thing, its not what they want..because ur CHANGING it. i hope u catch my flow. that rule of thumb also goes for the ppl that are involved with it b/c trust me, youre going to waste a lot of time for nothing b/c no matter how hard u try its still going to be what u dont want. yes i am the UNIVERAL BUBBLE BREAKER but i needed to slap u in the face and make sure u knew that b4 u wound up in that situation. IM JUST LOOKING OUT FOR YOU because i love you, i love you all. (except for david because he called me fat and then made his mom yell at me) and if u dont listen to me and end up being screwed, hit up either me or mart for the top 10 bible verses to know that we got, they really help for like every situation. no joke. ok well, im sorry if that first blog dissapointed you, but there are many more to come. goodnight everyone, and as the amazing alex byers says '2morrow is a new day' love that guy ehhhwwley |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | the song |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | URGH |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | 'OOH! KEVIN G! |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | i have many things that i have been thinking about lately. one being why its so easy to say that u dont care about someone when youre not around them, but then when ur with them u take it all back? or its so easy to say that u hate someone or that u just want to never see them again, but then when u see them u would kill for them to even talk to you? two being why is it that when u have no authority or right over a person you still feel like that are yours? like u know that u have no reason to, but u get insanely jealous when someone else is with them and hes not giving his attention to you? and u cant tell anyone because u have no reason to be feeling those feelings because hes not 'urs'. like why is it such a big deal when u see him later laughing with someone else, or when he casually puts his hand on someones hip, just in a friendship way. why is it that in a realtionship one person can love someone with all their heart and soul, but the other person doesnt even mind that much when the relationship is finished? like it doesnt make sense. also do u think that it is possible that every one has someone out there in the world for them, but when u find them, maybe ur not the person for them? their person is still out there. like is it possible to find someone that ur meant to be with, and love so much that u could never love anyone greater, but then that person isnt meant to be with you? i hate thinking about things like that. me and tess just kinda got on some of those topics, and my mind was still flowin, so i had to blog. if u have the simple answer to any of those q's....just email them to me. me and rowdy are working together tonight, 4-cl, come and visit us striz |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | well as u all have probably guessed by the title of this blog i am having a co-ed sleepover with the universally loved alex byers. he apparently 'doesnt want to sleep by himself in his house' so my dad was like 'well theres an aero mat in the basement' and that was that. right now were just chillin, and its just cool...because its cool. lets see. today i went to the cross-town club with sarah, and then i rollebladed around the lake by myself cuz sarah wussed out. then me and tess went to byers' house b/c there were about 40 cars outside and his door was open. but really no one was inside and he had just stupidly left the door open. me and sarah like snuck all in thinking that they were like hiding from us too, but really... no one was home. then later me tess c-dub byers and clay chilled in the long lot. no joke. and then byers is sleeping over. its been a grand day. have u ever experienced i time when someone is talking to u about a time that u two had together but u dont remember it and u think that the other person dreamed it. like u know that it was a dream and its just really funny? well that just happened to me. ill just share that great experience with you all: mattgoneWild04: make sure to bring those sexy pajamas, the ones i love, those sexy sweats. HcKYcHiCA06: hah what. what sexy sweats? mattgoneWild04: u know damn well, remember when we went to ur house and then u went to change and then u changed into those sweats and u looked super fine assed in em HcKYcHiCA06: i think that was a dream mattgoneWild04:u changed into gray sweats wit sumin written on the butt, and a dark burgandy red shirt HcKYcHiCA06: i dont own pants liek that, im sorry man it was a dream mattgoneWild04: no way i hate u so much, ally, it was so sexy. u have to remember, and bring them to camp HcKYcHiCA06: im sorry and it just went on for a while. lol well that about wraps it up, im going to the driving range tmrw. it will be a grand time. peace aballaby 'u want to come to the pants party?' 'are u asking me if i want to come to a party in your pants?' '....yes' ~~anchormizzan~~ |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | ok so i realized last night how mean ppl are to each other. like its not a lot to where ppl notice that much, but when you sit back and look at it, people are just plane mean to each other. i also noticed last night how nice clarsky dub is. i think that we should all just take a leaf outa her book and just try to step it up in the niceness scale, myself included. and we shoudl give her an award. wow im excited for 2nite, theres a rumor that a bus-full of ppl are going to grand slam, and thad be wicked awsome. i havent been there yet, ever. greatest 2 moments of my life yesterday: *getting off of work at 930 when i started at 2 *listening to a mix in byers' car from the summer b4 7th grade it was hot well i gatta go to work, come visit me, were open til 7 ewl |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | hewlow. it feels like it has been a hella long time since i blogged. or blogged about anything of importance. ya the 2nd one. right now i have my friend over brittany, shes my moms best friends daughter, but now her and my sister and her friend carrie hoppman are playing mario cart, and i got shafted. man i had fun last night. me tess claire clay travis dave and byers had a tramp party and we all watched claire jump retardidly (i dont know why she looks so funny haha). but travid protected me and others in his boobs, which are massive. we climbed into his cleavage. it was a good time. no but so everyone leaves to go home and likei SWEAR that i had my phone. but then i went inside and i couldnt find it later. so i assumed that i left it out on the tramp. i went out there..and it wasnt there. so i went back and got a flashlight and looked on the ground for about 20 MINUTES and couldnt find it. then i went inside and gutted my room incase i threw it in there and guess what? I DIDNT FIND IT! so i went to bed thinking that my phone was ont he ground outside getting all full of water and morning dew, and then i had a few nightmares, and then claire called me saying that she took my phone home in her purse. it was a beautiful thing. thanks claire for making me one hour deprived of sleep. jk i love this SAT class, its full of 12 hot junior guys i want to announce to the world that i have overcome a large barrier in my life, as of yesterday. and it feels good. it took a lot of cold pricklies to make it happen, but i got 'er done. wewell i hafta go play nintendo..peace holla 'I DONT KNOW WHY WE ARE YELLING!!...LOUD NOISES!!' ~ the best movie ever ****striz |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | ATTENTION!! this goes out for YOU!...seriously Theres something bout the way you look tonight, Theres something bout the way that i can't take my eyes off you. Theres something bout the way your lips invite, maybe its the way that i get nervous when your around. And I want you to be mine Theres something bout how you stay on my mind, theres something bout the way that I whisper your name when I'm asleep Oh no. Maybe its the look you get in your eyes. Oh baby its the way that makes me feel to see you smile. And the reasons they may change but what i'm feeling stays the same. urgh. ~a tired and sad ally~ |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | its been a while...member that song? no fer real its been like a week and a lot of shia has gone down. lets have a large and in charge replay: right b4 i left claire and byers were at my house playing board games and reading about how mary-kate is addicted to drugs until like 1215, and then i still had to finish packing. then about 10 minutes later i had to be at the ariport at 6 in the morning to catch a plane to Mass for a hockey camp. day1: it was tight cuz we just kinda chilled at our coaches house and ate a lot of food and watched van wilder. great..yet sick movie. and we got our hotel room and got all settled and shtuff. day2: we were woken up at 615 for breakfast and like an orientation that me and brando were late to cuz we were buying little toy boys lacrosse sticks. they were a necessity. then we got our clothes that we had to wear ALWAYS and then we skated edges and stuff and split us ito groups. i guess by watching you skate on your ourside and inside edges they can tell how good you are at hockey..and i got shafted cuz i haddnt skated in 2 months. but it was fly. then after skating we had plyometrics--if u dont know what those are just think jumping...lots of jumping. after that i dont really remember exactly what we did but somewhere in there we skated 3 more times and had 3 more drylands b4 being shipped back to the hotel at 930. day3: it was our first real day and it was the longest day of my life. i was amazingly sore from the day before and honestly couldnt walk. but regardess we had 4 killer hours of skating with a wicked long run in the woods by the arena in the rain. like it wouldnt have been that bad but then we ran by the steepest hill that u have ever seen and our coach made us slide down it. little did we know that we were going to sprit up that beyatch thousands of times until this 14 year-old like collapsed on the hill and then we dicided it was time for us to run all the way back. i pretty much died. after that it all blurred together. day4: 2nd real day, and at this point i was so sore that when i tried to get out of bed my legs gave out. it was a horrible experience. but it was worse trying to put my pants on b/c TO SAVE MY LIFE i could not pick up my leg to put them on. so i ended up sitting on the bed and using my ARMS to pick up my own leg. also the highlight of this day were the slide boards. if u dont know what they are they are like a sheet of plexi-glass that u slide across with little booties on. it seems fun but its not. i reached a point that i had never reached before. at a point my legs gave out at the end and honestly i could not get up. like i REALLY couldnt. im lying on this plastic sheet in a puddle of my own sweat trying to use my arms to lift myself up and at that same time about 130 coaches and councelors surround me and are screaming at me to get up and are like hitting the walls and floors and im just wiggin out. i thouhg i was dying. i think i was becase i dont remember ne more. xcept that we skated for the same 4 hours and had thesame drylands. oh we did have the stabillity balls for one dryland which i got a kick out of. that was a highlight. day5: our last real day. it was just like the onthers xcept for that we had a scrimmage for our last our of skating. and and durring the day we had this like crazy kickboxing thing. the lady who ran it was the beastiest ladies i have ever seen. she was REALLY into the whole thing. and it was wicked tired after it, it was 2 strait hours of lots oj jumping and football running and punching air. it was funny cuz everytime we did just a normal jab we had to say the person we were imagining that we were punching. it was a good time. i bet u are all wondering who i was punching. lol. annnnywayy day6: this day all i can say is parachutes. and mine was HUGE. talk about pulling the groin muscles. ouch. still cant walk right. but that was about it. oh and i met some really cool ppl there. ill just tell u the ones that reminded me of ppl here: -this girl names leah who was the spitten image of meg, ben carlsons older sister - i swear this girl could have been brandon b's sister - this coach who was an older adam galililiililii...hmm and the cool ppl were the one girl that was called corey that i thouht was a guy for a while and my roomate called gardner, but with a boston accent it was gaadnaa. ** and i heard the song coolo about 20 times along wiht freak-a-leak. it was tight as hell. well this is a wicked long blog just about camp, i think that ill come back tmrw after church and blog fer real. night all *~minnesota~* (that was my name at camp??, along with strick) |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | i just got home a little bit ago, and im glad that i did. im just in a damn good mood right now. ill just give u the good day run thru right quick: *woke up at 1030 *byers picked me up at 11 15 and we went to the twins game. we did happen to miss the only scoring of the game, but it was okay because byers made up for it by buying a foot long beast of a hotdog. and he purchased my ticket. twas a grand ole time *went to work and had the best time i have ever had there. me and yossi had some deep convos, and i dont think that i have ever laughed so hard. when we get fruit its put in this huge plastic bin-thing and put in the freezer for when we need it. so we needed it today and we had no idea how to get it out of being a giant frozzen rasberry ice cube. we sat there in the back with huge butcher knives just stabbing the thing and then using a plasic spoon put the shavings in another bin to use. meanwhile we listened to the jason mraz cd FOUR TIMES. eventually we were covered in melted chunks of soggy rasberries and we had spilled the giant icecube on the table. after that, im not sure what really happened. all i know ids that i had to clean it up *then i went home, changed and drove to clarsky dub's house,...just in time to say bye to ppl and to take byers home. but really we didnt go home, but had our own partay and picked up te$$ *we went to baker square and then partayed in the long lot with a hard-core q&a session. sorry u missed out. *then i went home. * i blogged sad everyone is leaving and i feel that im never going to see anyone again. i really want to have a giant calander of when everyone is leaving and coming back cuz right now im flappin in the breeze here. i havnt packed and i have to be at the air port at 6 in the moonin at sat. i have some work to do. well i will bid you farwell, if i be just for the night, or for the next couple of weeks. aye aye aye. come visit me i work tmwr 4-cl night lovers *~Al~* |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | honestly alex byers is the best person ever. like no matter what negative thing i say he always has something to turn it around. i could say that i hate the way the state of new york is shaped and he could tell me that maine is in the process of selling a chunk of land to NY and in the end it will look differnt. HcKYcHiCA06: but it pisses me off, like all the fricken love stuff BaSeBaLLa964: well a-weew-lo that is why u dont get involved like that BaSeBaLLa964: u get into really great friendships BaSeBaLLa964: and u just love life with ur friend BaSeBaLLa964: and as far as tappin goes BaSeBaLLa964: i am always an option i love this kid you dont even understand. and tmrw we are hittin a hot twins game, it will be a big day. and im working tmrw with yossi, 4-cl, EVERYONE come and visit me no but reallyi had fun 2nite at avitals, we played the question game, which is fun like always, and just chilled. we did leave at about 1145 and i got hom eat like 1230, we just got hard-core lost. like not lost, just missed every possible exit and such. over the last 2 days something happened that made me EXTREMELY happy, and something that just made me want to throw up again, out of like..anger?.. i dont even know. so if u think that u did the thing that made me happy please do it again for my sake, and if u think u did the thing that made me want to cry and enter into a feedle position, try and avoid it, or at least around me. well, im off to bed, and i hate it. why do u always dream about the thing that u cant have, and is the last thing that u want to be thinking about. after a dream dont u wake up so happy that u finally got it, but then u realize that it was all a JOKE and u get to either go out and see the harsh truth in the real world, or go back to bed and have it happen all over again. yay. now im excited. night world *striz* |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | who ever said that dress-up was for little kids was stupid. cuz im proud to say that in this last year alone i have played dress-up at leaste...mmm..18 times. no seriously i think like 5. thats kinda embarrising, but i wear it proudly. i think the only person that should be embarressed is clay, cuz he just looked stupid, or more likea beastie girl as i stated earlier. oh and claire, u looked like u were on every drug possible. sorry. i want to bring to everyones attention that in the last 3 weeks i have seen david...1ce. ok, i was gone for two of those weeks, but i have been home for like a week and i have seen david 1ce. oh i forgot, hes too busy with every girl in the sophomore class, my bad. david, i thought that we had something, like we had some sort of connection. we went rollerblading around the lake together, that meant so much to me. i thought we were .... friends. **sniff** moving on boob-tag was fun last night. but its one of those games that no one wants to play, cuz u can NEVER relax the whole night. ur just reaching acrosse the table for some popcorn or sitting down, minding your own bizznas when....WWHACK...riioot in the boob. but it does keep everyone on their toes. by the way, who is IT? ok this goes out to someone in paticular, but im not going to say who. i just want u to know that u mean so much to a lot of ppl, more people then u think. u make ppl laugh, and feel really good about themselves, especially me. you mean a lot to me and if anything happened to u i would be devistated. and i know a lot of people that feel the same. what ur thinking about would not help anything, even tho is seems like its only logical thing to do in ur case. but its not. at all. i bet thats what she thought too, but it didnt help a thing and think about how it made u feel, and what it has brought u to considereing. it would just bring more people to to feel what you are feeling right now. it woudl make everything worse. so many people love you, please know that. please, at least think about what i said. ~)me(~ |
1,932,521 | female | 16 | indUnk | Taurus | 12,August,2004 | no if i were to serisouly blog fer real about eveything that i have been doing for the last 2 weeks u would be reading for a bout 5 1/4 hours. and i can pretty much skip church camp cuz i bet stess had some wicked blogs about it. but i can always brush on some highlights anyway lake geneva CSI |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 29,June,2004 | I'm so obsessed with knitting, I decided I needed a spot where I could track my finished projects, muse about future projects, and generally go on about it all without being a drag on my regular journal, where I get to be boring about my life as a mama instead! I thought I'd just post pictures of my projects thus far, starting with my first scarf last November, which I made along with armwamers, with no pattern for a little family friend; however my son, Silas, is modeling them. They were made with some cheapy Lion Brand chenille, since I was deathly afraid of ruining good yarn, and I had yet to discover the many amazing yarn stores Seattle has to offer! Next I made a couple facecloths for my sisters for Christmas: I can't recall what order I made all of these, but I made them in December 03 and January 04. The kids' scarves have no pattern, nor does Vivienne's hat, but Silas' hat is 'Hot Head' from Stitch 'n Bitch , as is my kerchief: Next came my urlLink Booga Bag , my first attempt at felting. I used Noro Kureyon #126: Around the same time, I started a sweater for Silas. I only JUST finished it, so I'll post pictures as chronologically as I can manage. I also started the 'Little Black Top' from Stitch 'n Bitch for my sister, and a felted hat for my other sister. The hat is made with Cascade 220 (black) and a Dalegarn wool (purple), held together with a sparkly bit of something I bought off a cone at my LYS. Next I decided to make a urlLink little spring top for Vivienne. I used Paton's Fresco, and loooved working with a ribbon yarn. It was a nice break from the Little Black Top. Somewhere in there I made a spring shawl out of Plymouth Eros for our co-op preschool's annual auction, but I can't find any pictures. I did finally finish the 'Little Black (olive!) Top', and it fit my sister perfectly. It was my biggest success to that point. I had a huge sense of accomplishment. Here is Susan showing it off: I needed a major break from garments after that, but my addiction forced me to goof around with some spare yarns I had. So, yeah, a beer cozy: That was pretty dorky, but it did inspire a little thing I consider to be pure genius: (don't pretend you don't eat it out of the pint!) Then urlLink WEBS had a huge sale and I got a steal on some closeout Cascade Lana D'Oro. I started the 'Under the Hoodie', again from Stitch 'n Bitch . I'm still working on it, currently working on the first sleeve, but here's a view of the back: After frogging the sleeve once, I got sick of it and put it away for a few days. Well, of course, I couldn't NOT knit, so I seamed up Silas' sweater at long last: And that, my friends, brings us up to today! Still plugging away at Under the Hoodie, having made numerous stupid mistakes on the sleeve and having had to frog it twice. Next up is Knitty's urlLink Cleo for my other sister, Helen. I'm also planning on a cardigan by Kristin Sperklund from the urlLink Interweave free subscriber patterns for Viv, but I have yet to buy yarn or anything. I need to start thinking holidays, too! Okay. That's it for my first foray into blogging! C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 21,July,2004 | I finished another urlLink tiny ribby tank , except I changed it up a bit-- crossed the straps in the back and did a 3-needle bind-off instead of kitchener to graft the straps. This one is for my friend J's little cutie. Hopefully she will send me a picture of C modeling it! Now, onto Cleo for real. C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 13,July,2004 | Look at this yummy yarn: It came today, for urlLink Cleo , for my oldest sister. I'm so pleased she decided to order this yarn. It's soft and the color is amazing. Kinda splitty, but I think I'll get used to it. And, for the first time in my personal swatching history, my gauge was spot-on the very first try! I love urlLink elann.com . I got a good price on the yarn, and I received my order in two business days. I'm excited to start it, but I think I will finish up Tiny Ribby Tank #2 first. C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 10,July,2004 | Here's Vivienne in her new tank: poser! She immediately pulled like crazy on one of the straps & stretched it all to hell. Damn cotton. I washed it on warm/ gentle and it looked really messed up upon coming out of the wash, so I now have it on delicate tumble dry with hopes it's not ruined. Ayeeee. C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 09,July,2004 | A LiveJournal friend recently knit urlLink this cute tank for her daughter, and I was inspired to make one for Miss Viv. I happened to get some uber-clearance Lily Baby Cotton, so this cost me seriously less than $3 to knit. I had to learn kitchener stitch, which sounded easier than it was. Actually, the execution wasn't that hard, but it doesn't look that great. I need to figure out the trick to making it look nice & neat, I guess. Anyway, overall, I'm pleased with the top. The very middle stripe is leftover variegated cotton I had from some dishcloths. It looks much better in person than it does in the picture. It's obviously too late to have V model it, so I will add a picture of her showing it off tomorrow. These quickie projects are very satisfying to instant-gratification types like me. The yarn arrived for my sister's urlLink Cleo halter. It isn't quite as it appeared on my monitor. I guess there's the flaw in bargain-hunting online. I think it will work out okay, though. That's the next thing on the needles, and I will work on my hoodie here & there, too. I really want to make a big, soft afghan, too, in hopes my husband will finally get rid of the holey, sun-bleached, monkey-vomit-green one he's had forever. C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 05,July,2004 | I made the Umbilical Cord Hat from S'nB for a friend's new baby this evening. It's nice to know there's a pattern I can just whip out in an evening when friends have babies! It's cream-colored, despite looking white in the photo. Such a nice, easy thing to knit! C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 04,July,2004 | So my ice cream cozy was featured on urlLink Cozy of the Week . If you want to knit one, too, here's the made-up-as-I-went pattern: On size 5 US double pointed knitting needles, cast on 48 stitches, join, and divide among 3 needles. Knit 3 rows in k2p2 rib. Knit two rows. Add in scrap novelty yarn and knit however much you want with that. When you are about halfway done, k2tog after the sixth stitch on each needle. Add more eyelash or whatever as you see fit. About 3/4 way through, do the k2tog decrease again. For the next 2 rows, k2p2 rib, then cast off in rib. The last row should be the bottom of your cozy. I'm thinking after I finish the second sleeve, I'm going to put my hoodie aside for a bit. I need to knit the Umbilical Cord Hat from Stitch 'n Bitch for a friend's new baby, then I think I'll knit up one of urlLink these cuties for Viv. I got some Lily Baby Cotton for next to nothing today at Joann, since my store is moving and they are clearing everything out. I think it will work well for both the umbilical cord hat and the tiny ribby tank. C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 03,July,2004 | It's not so beautiful outside today, and T & I were out late celebrating his birthday last night, which leads me to think today would be a good day to sit around and knit. Unfortunately, I'm really sick of my hoodie. I can't start Viv's cardigan, since I'm waiting for the yarn to arrive. I can't start Cleo for my sister, because again, I'm waiting for the yarn. Ayeee. I guess I will just tough it our and work on the hoodie. I just want to be done with it already. I should look through my stash to see if I have some random cotton to make Viv a little tank. So, the new issue of urlLink Knitty . People are all a-swirl on the various knitting communities. People seems to feel strongly. I don't. I think some of the stuff is cute, though I am more inclined to make things I can show off, I guess because I'm still newish and it feels like such a giant accomplishment every time I finish a piece. I am considering making urlLink hush hush . It's really beautiful. I might wear it in public, actually. I'm thinking a silvery grey with black and hot pink ribbon. Ohh, Maybe I'll knit the top in black, the rest in the silvery grey and pink ribbon. Hmmmm. If I do, I'm sure it will take me ages. I can see it being something to have perpetually in progress when I get sick of scarves, hats and sweaters over the winter, and then voila! Next spring, I'd have a lovely little nightie/ dress. We'll see. Time to vacuum and do dishes, then I will hunker down with the sleeves to my hoodie. C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 06,August,2004 | I finally got through the lace band! It's really a cool pattern, once you sit down and do it with out small-child interruptions! I expect I'll finish the body today and then I need to go back and make another triangle. It's a little dark, and it's squished onto the circs, but you get the idea. What's next? I am going to finish off a Big Bad Baby Blanket for my friend, urlLink langus , who has thrown in the towel. Then I need to decide whether to focus on a bag for me-- I've got some Lamb's Pride Bulky in black and a nice deep pink waiting for me to knit & felt. I have a cardigan I want to start for Viv. I need to go back and add the hood to my hoodie. And then there's xmas presents... I'm pretty sure there will always be plenty of projects awaiting me from here on out. C |
1,238,294 | female | 33 | indUnk | Leo | 04,August,2004 | oh. my. god. Cleo is slowly killing me. I've ripped out one of the bra triangles twice. I got sick of that, so I moved on to the lace band, and guess what? I've ripped it out not once, not twice, but ohhhh 5 or 6 times! I've lost count. I need one full evening of total silence to get the lace band done, and done right. If I don't get it right next time, I may throw in the towel and come back to it next spring. ugh. I hate when knitting sucks. C |
2,435,706 | male | 16 | indUnk | Gemini | 07,December,2003 | Well, here I am, all alone, nobody to talk to. I'm Bored... I think I'll make this a place to write my poems even though I suck at writing poems coz I'm more of a story writer. Well since I have nothing better to do I will write a poem now. Here goes. Yesterday, You didn't have a clue, Yesterday, I seemed a little blue, Yesterday, The truth I thought to tell, Yesterday, My life was a living hell. Today, You're there with me, Today, My life is filled with glee, Today, The truth is told for you, Today, I still feel blue. I may have come out but my life still troubles me. A little weight is lifted but theres still so much that hurts me. I still have to get used to the fact that things will be different. But even if they are good things, it makes me uncomfortable. My parents act differently, they think things that are wrong. I've always been like this, and just because I am who I am, doesn't change the reasons for the things I like. You who read this may not fully understand what I mean, You're not like me, but one day it will be better. One day... I'll be truely happy. I just wish to be happy... now. Well ne way. Forget ur trouble come on get happy! You better chase ur cares away. lol I like that song. =P FUNKY FUN AND STUFF! BYE BYE! |
2,435,706 | male | 16 | indUnk | Gemini | 03,December,2003 | I rushed my English work so much today that I lost my really detailed front cover and forgot to draw an important diagram inside it! Well ne way, who has used an electric roulet game that zapps your finger!? Well I HAVE! and i put both my fingers in it creating a full body circuit around my arms causing me to be highly zapped 3 times IN A ROW!!!!! Well, ne way... actually I don't know what comes next... APPLE!!!! ...no ... ... FINGER NAILS!!! Don't you just love finger nails? They're great. I could talk about finger nails all day long! They're really handy when u r opening a can of drink, and when you need to scratch ur bak! If finger nails didn't exist I wouldn't know what to do. They can also come in handy when u r trying to get barcodes off products that u hav just bought. Usually they just end up ripping though! If I could turn back time, I wouldn't change a thing! But even in my prime, My heart forgets to sing. Secrets hidden so long, Have stopped me from myself, And when I find me soon, I'll prop me on my shelf. Thankyou and goodnight! You've been a gr8 audience! |
2,435,706 | male | 16 | indUnk | Gemini | 31,January,2004 | EVERYBODY SHAKE IT! TIME TO BE FREE AMONGST YOURSELVES! YOUR MOMMA TOLD YOU TO BE DISCREET! AND KEEP YOUR FREAK TO YOUR SELF! BUT YOUR MOMMA LIED TO YOU ALL THIS TIME! SHE KNOWS AS WELL AS YOU AND I! YOU GOT TO EXPRESS WHAT IS TABU IN YOU! AND SHARE YOUR FREAK WTIH THE REST OF US! COZ ITS A BEAUTIFUL DAY! SEXUAL REVOLUTION! NE WAYZ! now that I'm beginning to get over that song, I thought I might do a spot of BLOGGING! ALEX'S HOT TOPIC #1: Always wear underwear, no matter what you're wearing over them!!! coz sum1 might dak u! I HAVE A JOKE!!! ALEX'S JOKE #1: 'Knock Knock' ... 'Who'z there!?' ... 'Mary!' ... 'Mary who!?' ... 'MARY CHRISTMAS!!!' Sorry, that joke was in a little kids winnie the pooh christmas cracker and it made me and my friends laugh alot! NOT THAT WE FOUND IT FUNNY! Just how stoopid it was! Once upon a time there was a boy called Boagle! He went to Horty Torty Primary Skool! He was sooo silly coz he constantly fell in a hole! Well this one time, he had just arrived at skool, he walked into the grounds and fell in a hole... and THEN he went and played downball! But the ball hit him and he fell in a hole! So he went and fell in a hole... and THEN he went to class, which had a hole in the doorway and he fell in it! THE END!!! Stay tuned for more Boagle! THATS ALL FOR NOW!!!! BABAU FROM AKIRA (Alex) YAY! WOOT! |
2,435,706 | male | 16 | indUnk | Gemini | 24,June,2004 | OK OK In my last blog which was a few minutes ago, I forgot to give a hot topic AND a joke AND i forgot to write the next installment of boagle, the boy who falls in holes. So here goes: ALEX'S HOT TOPIC #2: What ever you do, never and I mean NEVER put your face at the entrance of ball returners at AMF bowling. Coz you never know when a chicken is going to hit you in the head! I mean a BALL! Not a chicken! ALEX'S JOKE #2: What did the elephant say to the giraffe? How did you ever get so tall and thin while I'm stuck in this fat, heavy body? I KNOW I KNOW! It isn't funny and really it's not a joke... but I didn't have any on hand! Adventures of Boagle, Episode 2: It was the weekend and boagle felt like riding his bike, so he went out the back and fell in a hole . Then he got on his bike and fell in a hole . He rode around the block three times and through Horty Torty School twice. Then he sat down and fell in a hole . So he sat down on a grassy knoll. He got out his sandwich which was actually a hole and he fell in it . So he went and fell in a hole . On his way home he fell in a hole and then he fell in a hole . Around the corner he fell in a hole , and in the driveway, and at the door, and in his room. So he came to the conclusion of watching where he walks, so he immediately... ...fell in a hole. STAY TUNED FOR MORE BOAGLE!!! |
2,435,706 | male | 16 | indUnk | Gemini | 24,June,2004 | Wow! It's been a LONG time sincee I last blogged! So HERE I AM! How are you? I am good! Ooh! Ooh! I f you're interested, I have a new website, it is www.alex.cooolman.com It's still well under construction but its got a picture to look at. More will be added quite soon so hold on to ya hats! IM SO EXCITED! AND I JUST CAN'T HIDE IT! Coz I got a PS2 and a really kool new mobile! And im staying at my sister's house because i'm working with her husband for two weeks because of work experience! AND!!! I'm going somewhere very special which I can't say because I really want to keep it private ... SO I'VE GOT A SECRET!!!! KEWL! eeewww.... KRYSTAL!!!! YUK! POO HEAD!!! NE HOOOZ... Have a nice day and a wonderful life! BABAU! ;) |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 26,May,2004 | Woohoo - she'll be here tomorrow! - which probably means I need to clean the place up a bit - uh oh :( Since Jen's going to get a car we'll be able to at least grab some furniture so she'll have somewhere to sit - and she has timed it perfectly for the pool opening on the weekend. While I'm slaving away in work, she can lie by the pool and fight with the cicadas :) Got my HDTV Cable hookup - unfortunately the on-demand function seems to have broken in the meantime, so I have to get out early again today so someone can come look at it. On the brighter side of things techie I managed to blag two 1U dual PIII 866 machines for free, I'll swap the mobo's out into a more reasonable case and hook them up at home - no idea what I'll use them for yet but I'm betting that they'll munch a few SETI units in the meantime while I figure it out..... One last thing - where the hell is the Alt Gr button on US keyboards? - it annoys me to have to type Alt+0128 for the Euro (€) symbol and then have to remember what the code is for accented e etc. I know I could change the keymap to UK or whatever but I shouldn't have too - how about an Alt Gr option or something? *end of rant* |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 24,May,2004 | That's right, this is the week, Jen arrives on Thursday and will be staying right through to the following Sunday - Yay! :) Also on the good news front, I now have Cable TV, Broadband and a new mattress. On the not-so-good-news-for-Jenny front I still don't have a bed frame, a couch, or even something besides the floor for her to sit on...... On the other hand that does mean that she will have plenty of reasons to do that favourite female pastime - shopping! And with someone else's money no less - always the best way to do it. Should be getting a few rack mounted dual PIII's gratis from the job too - will be nice to play with them, maybe set up a beowulf cluster or something else equally difficult to configure :) After all I'll need something to do with my spare time when Jen leaves :) |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 21,May,2004 | I'll be getting bot a new mattress and cable TV/Cable internet on Saturday. The prospect of Digital Cable with HDTV and a 3MB cable connection makes me drool :) Should be cool - though I still need some furniture - a desk, a couch, a coffee table etc. The place looks so bare without anything - though the stacks of DVD's books and cd's help a bit - so shelves are on the list of things to buy too..... At least the TV works as a monitor so I'll be able to actually able to use my cable connection when I get it. Hopefully the next post will be from my G4 cube hanging of a 3MB cable connection :) |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 19,May,2004 | My stuff from Ireland arrived this morning - so I now have all my CD's, DVD's, clothes etc. Unfortunately I have nowhere to put them :( On the bright side though, I did get my new urlLink TV . Not a bad price either. Plan is to use that for now and them wall mount it in the bedroom when I get my bigscreen TV later. I've been looking at some of the 50' to 60' DLP screens but I can't decide at the moment. My phone should be hooked up tomorrow which just leaves the Cable to go, fingers crossed I'll be up and running by Monday - it's always nice to have a 3 MB internet connection :) Got a nice aerobed to sleep on for now, my mattress has been ordered and should be here on Saturday. No word on my bed frame yet though - can't win them all I suppose. |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 11,May,2004 | I've decided to document my little adventure in America. My previous attempt at a blog ( urlLink http://adam.killingmachines.org ) has fallen by the wayside somewhat, but I think with some of Blogger's extra features, I should be able to rectify that situation. Besides all that - it will give me somewhere to moan about the red tape infested wold you end up in when you immigrate into the US these days. Anyways, on with the blogging - after nearly 6 weeks in the country I finally have a new place to live - right next to Reston town center. The rent is reasonable and the big bonus is that I'm within walking distance of the job, which is good given how hard it is to get a drivers license in the state of Virginia when you were born outside the US. Go take a look at the urlLink requirements (pdf) for yourself and try to figure out how many of those documents you might have. It turns out that the only thing I can use to prove my identity besides my passport is the I-797 form I got when applying for my Visa. Not too bad you might think, but then I applied for the Visa in January, so my memory of forms I obtained is a little hazy. It was only when I got desparate and started Googling every form listed on the sheet to see if I could get one that I found out I had the I-797 already. Once I get the learner's permit it's just 30 days until I can take the test - that should be just in time for delivery of the new car :) Other than that things have been going pretty well. I'm finally going to learn PERL tomorrow - properly this time too - not my usual half assed attempt - the company are paying for an intensive 3 day advanced course - it would be nice to know at least one programming language properly. Most importantly, my lovely (and far too good for me) girlfriend is visiting in a couple of weeks - all I have to do now is make sure there are things like a bed, chairs, tables in the new place before she comes. Another trip to IKEA is needed methinks..... That's enough for now - more when I get bored :) |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 25,June,2004 | Not so much from the what happened point of view as from the 'thank God it's over' point of view. For some reason I was shattered this week - I essentially passed out around 9 p.m. on Wednesday night and slept right through. Then my bloody ankle started to act up- just when I thought it was getting better..... On the plus side I found the excellent urlLink Dia program which should do as a nice replacement for Visio - who needs licensed software anyway? The IC department in work finally delivered the Linux box I ordered. They'd imaged it with Redhat 9, but I didn't like the way they had the disks partitioned and I like to stay a bit more current, so following a plesant experience with urlLink Fedora Core 2 on my laptop, I installed that instead. The box itself is a decent spec considering they gave me whatever they had spare - it's a 2.4 Ghz P4 Dell- not bad at all. Now I'm going to watercool my shuttle system so it stops making so much noise. Annoyingly it looks like I might have to replacethe RAM in that system - seems to have developed somenasty errors - every time I try to view a Windows Media player video on it the program crashes - and games work for about 5 seconds. Strangely enough Quicktime seems to play fine so maybe it's a directx memory addressing issue or summat. |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 19,June,2004 | Well, now that things are settling down a bit I find I have a bit of spare time on my hands. I have plenty of things on my to-do list but I've got some stuff done. First off I have kicked off the transition of urlLink Comerford.cc to urlLink PHP Nuke . I won't be using Dreamweaver to administer the site anymore, because I no longer have a license for it with the change of job, hence the transition to a more web based management of the site. You can view the initial template here: urlLink Nuke Site . In fact now that I have switched jobs a lot of my licenses are hosed - Photoshop is gone too, not to mention Windows XP Pro (I do have an XP Home license, but why bother.....). There was a time when I would have just kept on using them illegally but that's over. Usually I can find an alternative that's free and usually Open Source, so that's what I intend to do - just for kicks, here'sthe list and the alternative: Windows XP --> Linux (currently Fedora Core 2 but that may change) Dreamweaver --> PHPNuke & BlueFish/Quanta Photoshop --> The GIMP Firefox --> Same, just on Linux :) Thunderbird --> Same, just on Linux :) Fedora Core 2 is currently running happily on my little Sony R505DL laptop, and all of the bits and pieces, besides the scroll wheel (which I never used anyway) is working. I'vealso managed to get an RSS feed to work on PHP Nuke by converting the Atom feed. I put a little guide up on how I did it here: urlLink Atom to RSS . So, left on the to-do list: Install Linux on the Xbox Build out my two other dual CPU boxes and get them up and running Linux Design a new theme (or use an existing one) for the Nuke Site And there's probably more I'll dream up along the way. That's it for now...... |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 16,June,2004 | Woohoo! - I got my learners permit! This time I got every question right, though if I'd had this test last time I would have had no trouble then either - just the luck of the draw I guess..... Now all I have to do is learn how to drive before my car arrives next month :) Yesterday was a pretty good day all round in fact - as well as the successful test, the Pistons destroyed the Lakers. Since I had 20 euro on the Pistons at 8-1 odds I was pretty happy :) A fact that I am now paying for since my happiness inspired me to drink 7 or 8 beers, oh well. So, no going out for me tonight - have an 8 o'clock start in work tomorrow and I need some sleeeeep. |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 14,June,2004 | Just realised I never mentioned the new chair - My Lazboy arrived on Saturday and I'm glad tosay it rocks :) On the bad side of things - I managed to fail the theory test on the Virginia drivers license exam so I have to re-take it tomorrow........grrrr What's annoying is that I needed 20 correct out of 25 and I got 19 - the last question was how much more likely you are to have an accident if you are drunk - 5 times, 7 times, 10 times or 12 times. How the hell am I supposed to know that - so I went for 12 times and got it wrong - pain in the ass. At least I can get another lift down to the DMV early next week. Guess I better get studying :) |
3,309,662 | male | 25 | Internet | Aries | 13,June,2004 | Finally got around to installing linux (fedora core2) on the laptop - it is working quite well, I even have wireless networking going on it, using the Netgear WG511 card I bought a while back - Nice :) Also have the bare bones for 2 new systems - one dual PIII 1Ghz and one dual PIII 866. The second one will be donated at cost to Mr. Irwin who has been good enough to drive me around the whole time and populate my apartment :) The other will be my default file/web/whatever server on my home network. Since it has RAID capabilities I should be able to come up with a nice fast machine :) Haven't decided what to run on it yet - BSD or Linux......Fedora doesn't seem too bad so far, gentoo is a possibility if I'm bothered putting the time in, then BSD is as stable and secure as it gets, hmmmmmmm... Anyways - back to watching the basketball, after seeing England go down to France tonight, a Pistons win would be the icing on the cake :) |
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