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At this point I wept...
I thought this film was the most horribly painful piece of viewing I have ever been subjected to, the scene where the pilot sacrifices himself by refusing to jump out the explosive laden truck due to not wanting to kill any civilians is not so much tragically sad as it is unnervingly horrible and painful, although not quite as bad as the emergency surgery on the wounded girl.
The acting was poor all round, the script and story was weak, the "action" was even weaker, and the "visuals" were but bluntly not all that visual.
To summarise there are films which are good, films that are bad, films that are so bad they are good, films that are terrible...
And then on a whole new level is "McBain"
This was an absolutely terrible movie.
Don't be lured in by Christopher Walken or Michael Ironside.
Both are great actors, but this must simply be their worst role in history.
Even their great acting could not redeem this movie's ridiculous storyline.
This movie is an early nineties US propaganda piece.
The most pathetic scenes were those when the Columbian rebels were making their cases for revolutions.
Maria Conchita Alonso appeared phony, and her pseudo-love affair with Walken was nothing but a pathetic emotional plug in a movie that was devoid of any real meaning.
I am disappointed that there are movies like this, ruining actor's like Christopher Walken's good name.
I could barely sit through it.
Creep is the story of Kate (Potente), an intensely unlikeable bourgeois bitch that finds herself somehow sleeping through the noise of the last underground train, and waking up to find herself locked in the tube station.
After somehow meeting workmate and would-be rapist Guy on a mystery train that runs after the lines have closed, things go awry and she finds herself pursued by what lurks beneath the city's streets.
Her story is linked to that of George (Blackwood), an ex-con working in the sewer system;
they meet in the final third of the film, brought together by their attempts to escape the monster that pursues them.
The pair proceed through a set of increasingly unlikely locations;
from the Tube station, they end up in the sewage works before somehow finding themselves in some sort of abandoned underground surgery.
Most Tube stations don't have toilets, so how one has a surgery is beyond me.
Naturally, the film cares to explain that the surgery doesn't have running water.
Yet it has electricity?
Just one of many inconsistencies that work against the atmosphere of everyday believability that the film tries to create.
The monster itself is a problem.
There's a complete lack of reasoning for its actions, it just kills people for no obvious reason.
And then of course it keeps some alive for no real reason either, perhaps just so that they can eventually escape and give the film an extra 15 minutes or so running time.
I understand that natural evil is supposed to be scary, but then the film attempts to explain itself via a photo of a doctor and his son, and a few shots of some jars containing babies, and yes, it is just as tired and pathetic as it sounds.
It also fails to explain how the creature has been underground long enough to lose the ability to speak, communicating only in raptor screams, but not long enough for its pair of shorts to decay.
Hmm.
This doctor business leads to scene that is the film's desperate attempt to implant itself on your memory, and while it is gory and uncomfortable to watch, it just isn't enough.
The final third of the film hinges on an emotional relationship that never existed, and the characters break down and recover for little or no obvious reason.
George breaks down, unable to cope with something despite stating that he wants to escape so he can see his daughter again, and Kate becomes emotionally tough seconds after going to pieces over someone that ripped her off for a travelcard.
Yeah.
After starting out as a "this could happen to anyone" movie, it quickly falls apart as it introduces ideas that make it more and more unrealistic.
A complete lack of emotional interest in the characters and an absence of suspense make this one to avoid.
The London Underground has something inherently creepy about it, with its long winding tunnels, the escalators taking you deeper and deeper underground, and of course the rats roaming the tracks.
It a source of wonder that it is not used in horror films more often.
It was used in the seventies horror Deathline aka Raw Meat, featuring a cannibalistic tribe living in a disused tunnel, and the celebrated chase sequence in American Werewolf in London.
So I was pleased to see that someone else had tried to capitalise on the atmosphere of the tube at night with the recent UK production Creep.
I thought the film started off well, with a highly effective credit sequence that was genuinely unnerving, followed by a scene in the sewers that sets up the premise of there being something evil lurking below the streets of London.
However, Creep went downhill from here, and I found myself wishing that I'd switched it off after this opening scene, leaving me with a favourable impression of the film.
All the characters become unsympathetic and unlikable, even Potente herself, and the director felt the need to hit us over the head with social commentary about homelessness.
he also made the mistake of showing the "monster" in full lighting, where he ceases to become remotely scary, and reveals his name to be Craig.
How can you have a monster called Craig?
It turns into an X Files-type thing, and reminds one of the episode Tombs.
In fact, I was wishing Mulder and Scully would turn up and sort them all out for me.
As for the infamous sexualised violence, it is very graphic, disturbing and totally unnecessary.
It seems to be there merely to shock the audience rather than for any intrinsic plot value.
The trouble is it is so over the top and horrific that it actually numbs you to the rest of the horror, which is a mistake as it's only halfway through the film.
So there you go.
The only redeeming feature of the film for me was a rare appearance from Ken Campbell, one of my favourite occasional actors.
You don't see him very often, but when he's on screen he acts everyone else into a corner.
Casting him as a sewer inspector was a stroke of genius, unfortunately the only one evident in the film.
The potential was there.
I saw Creep and thought, 'Oooh, this is getting interesting' several times.
Yet somehow the interesting plot lines wound up unexplained or ignored, like they never happened.
The lead character was irritating throughout the movie, and at one point my fella and I both shouted that we wanted her to die.
There are some genuinely spooky/scary moments, but these are grossly overshadowed by the moments that just annoyed the hell out of me.
It's another one of those horror movies that crops up and intrigues you for a while, but ultimately leaves you frustrated and a little confused about what the movie makers were trying to achieve.
The one saving grace of this movie is the bad guy, but when the baddie is more likable than the lead character you know you're on to a loser.
I'll keep this short as a movie like this doesn't deserve a full review.
Given the setting, this movie could have been something really special.
It could have been another "28 days later" or even a "Blair Witch Project" The first 20 or so minutes of the movie I was really excited, directer did a decent job with cinematography and suspense, although I don't think He managed to capture true eeriness of an empty London Underground.
Characters were a big let down.
Our "heroine" in this movie is a worthless piece of crap, and you really don't care if she dies or not.
As many people have said before, I was rooting for the homeless people and the black guy, who managed to give me a chuckle or two(whether intentional of the writers or not).
The main villain, is kept in the dark for the first half of the movie, but when he is revealed I was really disappointed.
I won't spoil it but lets just say my 10 year old sister could probably beat him in a wrestling match.
All in all this is just another mediocre horror film which falls into the trap of following a simple Hollywood formula.
This film had a lot of potential but really failed to hit the mark.
Just to highlight how lame this movie was, the characters in this movie had at least FIVE TIMES to finish off and kill the main villain.
INSTEAD THEY RUN AWAY.
I was so disgusted by this film, I felt obligated to warn off others.
This film has no story, plot or hint of purpose.
The film starts after the standard "lets be scary" movie intro, which by now every film watcher has become accustomed.
So we can ignore the beginning completely.
We are soon introduced to the main actress and from this point it becomes clear to all that you have just wasted your hard earned and would be better off watching static.
(Unless you have seen white noise - EEK) Acting is a DISGRACE and all of them should return to the travelling pantomime from where they came.
Having said that, even the best actors in the world would struggle to make this film remotely watch able.
Their poor performances merely contribute to the disaster.
Senseless violence and what I can only assume is the written word of yet another junked up "eccentric" writer, who probably considers himself to be an artist, has resulted in a film which will test your patience.
It was not until my fellow watcher turned to me and said, "We have been watching this for 45 mins" did I realise that this film is as thin and tasteless as a cup of tea without a tea bag.
Clearly something was missing and unfortunately it wasn't the audience.
Rather than suggest what the film is missing, let me tell you what it has: Dumb Blonde (surprise surprise), Victims, bad-monster-guy-thing, about 2 mins of storyline which is stretched over hours, days, weeks, months...
and credits.
Want a silver lining?
Well, the blonde girl is a bit saucy looking in some of the scenes, but expect to want to see her face ripped off for the rest of the film!
Absolutely laughable film.
I live in London and the plot is so ill-researched it's ridiculous.
No one could be terrorised on the London Underground.
In the short time it is not in service each night there are teams of maintenance workers down there checking the tracks and performing repairs, etc.
That there are homeless people living down there is equally unlikely.
Or that it's even possible to get locked in and not have access to a mobile phone in this day and age...
The worst that's likely to happen if someone did find themselves there after the last train is that they might get graffiti sprayed on them.
Although this has been coming under control due to the massive number of security cameras on the network, another thorn in the side of the story.
(Remember in London as a whole we have more security cameras than any other city in the world.) If it had been set in a city I am not familiar with perhaps I could have enjoyed it through ignorance, but it's not a high quality film so I just couldn't bring myself to suspend my disbelief and try and enjoy it for the banal little tale that it is.
I would have given it 0/10 if such a rating existed!
Possibly the most disappointing film I ever thought I would like.
Yet another example of the complete waste of UK Lottery money.